save me {myg/jhs}

two

The boys had gone to the diner and ordered as much as they could with their somewhat pathetic budget. It had been ramen and beer moreorless every night for a long time, but they had collectively decided that they could treat themselves, just for one night. Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook opted for big, greasy burgers while Jin feasted on some sort of seafood, and Hoseok and Namjoon ate noodles and rice. Hoseok was the first to finish his meal, leaning back in his chair and holding his stomach for dramatic effect.

"Aish, I'm so full," he whined, his eyes tightly shut but a smile remaining on his face to show his satisfaction.

His eyes traced over the other five boys as they continued to eat, and his heart sank a little at the absence of their seventh friend. He was worried about Yoongi. They all knew that he was generally a lazy person, but Hoseok feared there was a deeper cause to Yoongi's behaviour. He sighed and furrowed his brows, concern washing over him.

"Hey guys?" he called to interrupt the various conversations that were simultaniously going on amongst the others. "I, uh, I've finished so, d'you mind if I head back? I should check on Yoongi, see if his headache's still there." The boys mumbled and nodded in response. Hoseok smiled gratefully before handing his share of the bill to Seokjin and making his way out of the diner.

The walk home was quick due to the short distance from the diner to the house, along with Hoseok's fast pace. He walked fast mostly because it was pretty cold out, but subconciously he walked fast because he was worried about his friend. He reached the house and quickly unlocked the door before entering the living room.

"Yoongi-ah?" he called out, scanning the room in search for his friend.

When he was met with silence, he tried again. "Hyung?"

He listened hard for any sign of life, and he was about to go to Yoongi's bedroom when he heard a sudden sob coming from behind the kitchen counter. It was quiet and he probably would've missed it if he was't listening so intently. He paced into the kitchen, before his eyes filled with horror at the sight of Yoongi slumped against the wall on the floor surrounded by empty beer bottles, a bottle of sleeping pills in his hand and the lid by his feet. It looked as though Yoongi was struggling to keep his eyes open; Hoseok silently pleaded that this was simply due to Yoongi's drunken state, and not because he had already swallowed some of the sleeping pills.

"Jesus fucking Christ, Yoongi," he whispered as he snatched the pills from Yoongi's grasp, earning a desperate weep from the boy on the floor. Hoseok quickly got down on his knees, pushing the empty bottles carelessly out of his way and cupping Yoongi's cheeks with his hand, making them face each other.

"Yoongi, look at me," he attempted to speak in a stern voice but couldn't hide the way his voice was shaking. He swallowed hard. "Did you take any of those pills?"

Yoongi groaned as he struggled to keep his eyes open. He lack of a clear response made Hoseok panic, so he gently patted Yoongi's cheek in attempts to get him to focus.

"Yoongi, please, answer me." he spoke, choking back tears.

Yoongi shook his head drowsily before whispering "No." almost inaudibly, but loud enough for Hoseok to let go of the breath he didn't even realise he had been holding in.

"Jesus, thank fuck," he whispered, dropping his hands from Yoongi's cheeks. "What the fuck, Yoongi?" was all he could choke out.

Yoongi shut his eyes as tears seeped out through his long eyelashes. He threw his head back against the wall behind him.

"Aish, don't do that hyung, you're gonna hurt yourself," Hoseok wrapped his hand around the back of Yoongi's head, mindlessly playing with his black hair.

Yoongi laughed coldly before looking Hoseok directly in the eyes. "I don't care Hoseok. I want to die, fuck, I was about to fucking kill myself, I don't care if I hurt myself." he spoke, the alcohol in his system causing him to stumble over his words.

Hoseok just looked at him for a while. He didn't know what to say, or what to do. He just stared with a heartbroken expression on his face and glassy eyes.

"Hyung," he started, but was interrupted by Yoongi.

"Don't Hobi. Please don't...try and tell me that life's worth living because it might be for you but its fucking not for me." He rubbed his eyes and paused for a moment, before carrying on, getting more and more worked up. "Fuck, you know what? Maybe if you could just, just go back to the others and pretend you never saw me. And, then I could, I could just do what I'd planned-"

"No Yoongi."

Yoongi held his head in his hand as angry tears began rushing down his cheeks. Hoseok sighed, feeling helpless. He rested his hand on Yoongi's shoulder, causing him to look up.

"Come here." Hoseok said as he opened his arms for Yoongi to enter. He wasn't a therapist, he didn't know what he could say right now to make Yoongi feel okay. But he could offer him a shoulder to cry on. So he did.

Yoongi held his gaze on Hoseok for a moment, before completely losing his composure and throwing himself into his friend's embrace, tears furiously staining his cheeks, loud, painful sobs echoing through the house while Hoseok ran comforting fingers through his hair and over his back. They sat like this for a while, until Yoongi's hysterial sobs became small sniffles and heavy sighs.

Yoongi sat up from where he was slumped across Hoseok's body, wiping his eyes and taking a deep breath in, trying to compose himself.

"Sorry," he said in the calmest tone he could manage.

"It's okay," Hoseok replied with sympathetic eyes and a comforting tone. He took a deep breath. "Why didn't you tell us?" Yoongi simply shook his head in response.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Hoseok said, much softer and weaker than before.

Hoseok's second question hurt Yoongi much more than his first. He didn't want Hoseok to feel like he didnt trust him. Hell, he didn't care if the rest of his friends felt that way, not really. But Hoseok. Hoseok with his constant concern for Yoongi, the way he would ask Yoongi if he's eaten, if he's feeling okay, if he needed anything. Yoongi would hate for him to feel that way.

"I didn't want to hurt you, Hobi. I didn't want you to worry more than you already do."

Hoseok smiled sadly. "Yoongi...if I'd come home a little later and found you dead on the floor, do you not think that would've hurt me?"

Yoongi never really considered that. The boys coming home and finding him. He never thought about who it would be, or how it would fuck them up mentally for the rest of their lives. He silently cursed, scolding himself for not considering that he could have left Hoseok traumatised. He never wanted to hurt him.

"Fuck, Hoseok, I'm so fucking sorry." Yoongi pulled at his hair, a habit he had when he was stressed. Hoseok's hand made its way to Yoongi's, intertwining their fingers and gently pulling Yoongi's hand out of his hair.

"It's okay Yoongi. I'm just...glad I came home early. I had a bad feeling, I guess we're like, connected or something." He smiled, immediately regretting his words as he didn't want Yoongi to think he was trying to make this situation funny. "Sorry, bad time for jokes."

Yoongi smiled at him, eyes still puffy but now filled with admiration. "You're so cute Hoseokie." Hoseok looked away, failing to hide his blush. "It's okay, y'know what they say, if you don't laugh you'll cry, or whatever."

"Listen, Yoongi, tomorrow we can talk about getting you some help, okay?" Hoseok tried to be delicate with his words, not wanting to make Yoongi feel like he was crazy or anything like that.

Yoongi sighed, but ultimately nodded, accepting the fact that he needed it. The thought terrified him but he was willing to do it for Hoseok. The younger boy smiled, silently thanking Yoongi for co-operating.

Hoseok checked his phone. "Nearly 10 o'clock. The guys should be back soon." He stood up and began to clear up the beer bottles.

"Hey Hobi? Can we um, not mention this to them?"

"Okay hyung."

"Thank you."