deprived | jung hoseok

{ 08 }

The only thing I could do was try a different tactic.

Finally being able to work up the courage, I knocked on the door of your dorm, patiently waiting for any response.

As the door opened, I was met with your tired eyes, but a surprised smile quickly graced your face and it made my mind go blank. Your cinnamon hair was unkempt and your glasses were rested atop the bridge of your nose.

"Oh! You're a classmate! How are you?"

You were as nice as I thought you'd be and more, but that only caused the aching in my heart to intensify.

"Never mind me. Hoseok, how are you?"

You seemed to be taken aback by my question and gulped before nervously chuckling at me. Scratching the back of your head, you avoided any eye contact and replied,

"Um, I'm fine? I guess, I mean, I'm pretty content."

You were lying to me, I knew you were.

"Why do you consistently eat up her harmful words? She hurts you so much and yet, you still stare at her as if she's your entire world."

I teared up as the words left my mouth, not sure if it was pity, jealousy, or even both.

All you did was sigh and give me a soft smile, but I could still see the faint pain laced into your expression.

"She is my entire world and she probably forever will be. She was different, but I love her. I have hope for her, but thank you for worrying. Goodnight."

You politely closed the door as I stood there, tears threatening to fall from the precipice of my waterline. I quickly wiped them away, feeling guilty to be the one crying.

Walking away from your door without looking back, I felt at a complete loss.

I couldn't bear to leave you like that, but I guess you made it clear you didn't want my help.