Kyle and Johnny's Story

13 - Too Good of an Impression

Chapter Thirteen - Too Good of an Impression

Once they got inside Kyle sighed and slipped off his shoes. He rested his head against the wall by the mat where his family’s shoes were all lined up neatly and let a rough breath out through his nose, letting just a small part of his internal torment be visible for a second. With his eyes closed he could hear his mum move to align his own shoes on the mat, unhappy that he had left them haphazardly strewn by the door. Kyle put the palm of his hand against the wall to steady himself and then flattened out each of the fingers one by one. He heard Irene get up from straightening the shoes and moved around him. Quietly, she leant her shoulder against the wall beside his hand and looked down at him.

“I though you felt happy about this boy,” she said quietly, her voice completely neutral but questioning, no hint of confusion betraying her inner thoughts.

“It’s not him, believe me, I am over the moon about what has happened with him. It’s Steve and Peter,” he paused, eyes still closed, “What if I am gay? How are they going to react? And what if they tell people and the whole school finds out?”

Irene sighed, “I can’t promise you that they’ll be ok with if you are but I don’t think that they would have a problem with it. You’re great friends and even if they don’t accept you they wouldn’t tell other people. I know them well enough to say that even if they stopped being friends with you they wouldn’t tell anyone else.”

Kyle slowly opened his eyes, “I want to tell them. To share my thoughts with them, but it’s still scary.”

“It will always be,” Irene agreed quietly, “If you turn out to be gay then you‘ll quickly learn that this world isn’t kind enough to people like you.”

“That’s not fair,” Kyle answered blinking.

Irene nodded and pulled him into a hug, “Life isn’t fair.”

Kyle nodded and pressed his face into her shoulder, breathing deeply, trying to keep himself calm. It felt incredibly stupid to feel so upset about this but Kyle couldn’t help feeling like he was going to cry. He bit the insides of his cheeks and screwed his eyes shut, telling himself that if he cried now he’d only look like a girl.

Slowly he regained control. He broke away from his mum and thanked her for talking to him and for being so cool about what they’d discussed in the car. She just shook her head and gave him an awkward little side smile, letting slip a little sign of how worried she was now he’d confided how scared he felt.

Kyle shrugged and walked up the stairs, resigned. He shut himself in his room and slid down the back of the door, crumpling in on himself, letting his head fall into his hands. He sat there shaking slightly but kept his composure. When he felt calmer and dug his mobile out from his pocket and sent a short text to Johnny to tell him he was home. He let the phone slide from his fingers and crash to the carpet as he leant his back against the door and stretched out his legs.

Johnny responded speedily sending back ‘You still want me to come and get you?’

Kyle typed out ‘Yes please. I need you,’ then looked at in dismay and deleted ‘I need you’ before clicking send. He’d known Johnny less than a week and already he’d let his guard down so much that the only thing he felt would make him feel better was to see him. This time Kyle knew things were going to fast but he didn’t care. If being with Johnny made him feel better he wasn’t going to deny himself Johnny’s company.

‘Right now?’

‘Yes’ Kyle texted back simply. Hauling himself off the floor he trudged to the mirror and frowned at his dishevelled form. He grabbed a comb and tugged his hair into a passable style before realising he should probably shower before Kyle came round. Turning quickly and diving for his phone he hurriedly sent a text explaining that he needed 20 minutes to freshen up before Johnny came round. A little smiley face came back with an agreement to come round in 20 minutes while Kyle was in the shower, and made him smile when he got out and checked his phone.

He pulled on some clean clothes and dried his hair with his towel, plying it into a rough wind-swept look for easiness.

Within 10 minutes he was downstairs waiting by the door for Johnny, wishing he’d only told him to wait 15 minutes so that they could have been together quicker. He sat down on the stairs and leant against the wall, closing his eyes for a moment.

He head footsteps on the stairs behind him and quickly jumped up out of the way of his sister. Carmen poked her head through the living room door then closed it gently.

“Mum’s in there. How did it go?” she whispered grabbing the tops of his arms in excitement.

“it’s ok,” he reassured her, “Mum knows. I told her in the car this morning. She already knew that I’d left yesterday with a boy so it made sense to tell her why, that way I can share how I feel with her.”

Carmen looked a little miffed.

“You were still the first to know though!”

She perked up at that and shook his arms, “Details! I need details!”

“Well I can’t say much right know because he’s coming over to pick me up right now.”

She let out a little squeal, “I get to see him?”

“Well if you’re planning on sticking around there’s not much can do about it.”

“And Mum definitely knows about him?” she asked pointing at the closed door.

“Yes. She knows about him, his name, why I like him and everything.”

Carmen bit her thumb nail thoughtfully. She grinned at Kyle and raised her eyebrows before bursting through the living room door, “Kyle’s boyfriend is coming round soon so if you want to see him get near the door quick!”

Kyle trailed after her, “He is not my boyfriend!”

His sister just shrugged and beckoned to Irene who leaped off the sofa to join them.

As if on cue, a knock was heard at the door and both Carmen and Irene fell over each other trying to reach the door first. Carmen succeeded and threw open the door to reveal the very handsome Johnny standing outside.

“Hi, I’m here for Kyle. I’m Johnny,” he said addressing both the women who both now shared a look which meant ‘wow’.

“Kyle! You didn’t tell us he was gorgeous!” Carmen whispered fiercely behind he to Kyle who felt a little left out.

“It must of slipped my mind,” he murmured, it certainly did not, he thought grinned to himself.

Carmen introduced herself in a giggly voice and pointed to herself childishly.

“Nice to meet you Carmen.”

Irene gently pushed past her daughter, “Hello Johnny, I’m Irene, Kyle’s mother,” she held out her hand and Johnny shook it politely, “now if you’re done gawking Carmen I’m pretty sure Kyle will want to be leaving now,” she steered Carmen away from the door leaving Kyle alone with Johnny.

“Sorry about that,” Kyle apologised stepping outside, closing the door.

Johnny just laughed, “It’s ok, I think I made a good impression,” he said remembering Carmen’s ‘gorgeous’ comment.

“Maybe too good of an impression, it looks like Carmen might try and steal you!”

“Don’t worry, I don’t think any girl could turn me, especially not now I have you,” he said the last part quietly, slipping his hand into Kyle’s as they walked through the gate and towards the park.