For A Moment

Moving Too Fast

The next morning, I roll over remembering the night I just shared with a Miss Cassandra Jeffries. I smile as I see her hair sprawled out across the pillow, and see how peaceful she looks while she sleeps. I don't know what I did to deserve this angel in the bed beside me or in my life. All I know is that I don't want to wake up and find it to be a dream. I reach out and run my forefinger down her jawline and whisper as her green-brown eyes meet mine, "Mmmm, good morning beautiful..."

She smiles as she moves her face to kiss my finger, "Good morning..." she answers, her voice thick with sleep.

I move to lean my forehead on hers, "Sleep alright?" My hand moves up her side, and I'm rewarded with a soft sigh.

"Yes....did you?"

"Mhmmm...." I lean in and brush my lips on hers. "I could lay here all day and make love to you, but we have two little kiddos in the other room who will be up and starving for pancakes!"

She giggles softly as I feel her fingers scratch my side lightly, "It's ok....at least you can teach me how to make your famous blueberry pancakes..."

I sit up and laugh, "Oh, yes, that would include staying in the kitchen and not going to multitask..." I tease as I stand to get dressed.

She dresses quickly as well, throwing her hair up, "Well, I promise, I'll stay in the kitchen until it's all done cooking!" She crosses her fingers as she heads to the kitchen.

It's quiet, and I take the opportunity to make coffee and kiss on Cassie every chance I can. We enjoy talking softly, and at one point, I'm afraid nothing will get done because we can't keep our hands off of each other. "Move in with me...." I whisper as I run my hands around her waist and kiss her earlobe as she flips the pancakes.

She is quiet, too quiet almost and I feel my stomach twist as if I said the wrong thing. I nuzzle my nose on her neck as I listen to her breathing before pulling back. "What's wrong?" I flat out ask her as I lean on the counter and watch her.

She clenches her jaw then looks at me, "We just got here....where we are... I don't want to move too fast...." she says all of this slowly, as if she's afraid to hurt my feelings.

I sigh, "What are you so afraid of?" I sound kind of annoyed, and to be honest, I am.

She doesn't look at me, but bites her lower lip in same way she's always does when thinking or trying to not say anything wrong. Finally she pulls the last pancake out of the pan, "I'm not afraid....but really, Kate, think about it. Are you really ready to move another woman AND her kid in with you? After seven years of being a single mom?"

I am stunned as she says this, "You think I haven't thought about all of this? That I don't clearly think things through before I make decisions?"

She shrugs as she pulls down plates and cups. "I just think it'll be tough for you is all. You're used to being independent, and listen, I don't cook like you. You heard Marley! We eat cereal and microwave dinners...." she giggle and looks at me.

I sigh, trying not to ruin our morning right when the kids run in, "Pancakes!!!!!!!!!" They chime in unison.

I look at her and whisper, "This conversation isn't over..."

She ignores me as she pours the orange juice for them, and we all sit to eat the blueberry pancakes, sausage and juice, all prepared by Cassie, with my help. I barely listen to the conversation around the table as all I can think about is how she's really not all in like I am.

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CASSIE

When Kate asked me to move in with her I sort of panicked. How am I going to move in with her and blend our families? I don't understand why the concept scares me so much except that the anxiety I am feeling is that we will soon grow tired of each other especially when she really begins to see my flaws. After breakfast, we clean up, goofing off as usual while the kids go play in Marley's room. We have deemed this a pj and lazy day, and both Kate and I each make ourselves another cup of coffee before heading to my small living room to snuggle.