The Last Mockingjay [ON HOLD]

13. The Other Side

The first thing I notice is the light. It's so bright that it is almost blinding. It's no question that it is on purpose - so that they could catch me not on guard as they try to kill me. Well, I'm not going to go down without a fight, even without a weapon.

I raise my arms, and try to grab onto something. Anything, to help me see what is happening. As my eyes finally adjust to the light, I see two very familiar women. I stare at them. The one on the left, with short brown hair and golden eyes, is Paylor. Just the one I wanted to see.

However, it is the next one that confuses me. Flowing blonde hair is secured into a bun as she smiles nervously at me. On her face I can see the wrinkles, something I never imagined that she would have. Her warm, blue eyes welcome me, and for a second, I feel safe. But only for a second - this woman is my mom.

The exact person who abandoned me in my darkest hour, just because she too could not handle the grief. The woman who hadn't contacted me once for 25 years. I cannot help but cry. I stare at her, though my eyes become blurry. What's she doing here?

Finnick quickly releases me. 'Sorry, Mom,' he says.

I spin around. He looks... he looks normal again. His deep brown eyes stare into mine, and I realise that he was never really damaged. 'I had to pretend. So that Beetee wouldn't suspect.'

I slowly nod, still confused. 'What? What's happening?'

Paylor sighs and opens her mouth. 'No,' I say sternly. 'I do not want to talk to you.' I'm having trouble just controlling myself enough to say this one sentence. How could I punish this woman? Make her pay for hurting my children? Breaking her promises to me?

Mom, in the background, nods as if she understands. I finally feel the fire inside of me spread. 'Finnick Mellark. Tell me everything. Now. I am your mother, not someone you can keep secrets from.'

He looks down at the ground. 'As soon as Paylor announced mandatory viewing, we knew something was up - Rue, Beetee and I.'

I don't show any sort of facial expression. I just keep listening.

He continues. 'The night before the reaping, President Paylor came and visited us.'

Paylor looks to me as if she is proud. The urge to break her apart comes on stronger and stronger.

'She said that she would purposely only put Rue's name in the girls' bowl, and Beetee's in the boys'.'

'It was all planned out, Katniss,' Paylor says. I softly growl at her. 'I told you not to talk.'

Finnick keeps talking. 'That's right. It was. The whole Hunger Games was.'

Paylor then speaks. 'So that you can return to us. So that you can be our mockingjay once again.'

'What? What for? Why are you telling me this now? What... what about the dead tributes? Johanna?'

She swallows. 'We knew you weren't quite the actor that Peeta was. The tributes? They... sacrificed themselves. They were notified of this before the reaping - they did this for you.'

Johanna sacrificed herself for me? The mean, menacing Johanna?

'Why do you need me?'

'We have to rebel once again,' Paylor whispers. Mum looks to the floor, almost ashamed. I can see that she too is thinking of Prim, and how the last rebellion almost destroyed us.

'Against... against what? I'm not sacrificing my life. This time, it's not like 25 years ago. I have people depending on me now. What about Finnick? Rue? What about... what about Peeta?'

'Against Plutarch. A couple of people have crossed to his side, and they are causing trouble. I let him be in charge of District one and two, so that he could stop whining about his losses. It... it didn't work out so well. None of us have been able to see what's happening - he's passed a new law. But Plutarch? He has the winning side. He knows what he's doing in his districts, but also what's been happening in ours. The Hunger Games were just a distraction.'

'Plutarch Heavensbee, huh? I really thought that you would be wiser. You still haven't answered my question though. What are we rebelling against?'

'I've heard rumours that... Plutarch is trying to ruin Panem. Dominate it, so that he can turn it into his own.'

I swallow. Plutarch is a man who cannot see the big picture - only the small details. WIth his luxurious Capitol ways, he is near-sighted, whereas, we're not. We have all suffered. Lost many loved ones. Then I finally begin to see. Losing to Plutarch means losing Panem. Freedom - something that people also sacrificed themselves for 25 years ago. We cannot let it go into waste.

'We plan to kill off every single person who follows Plutarch. Brutal, but worth it.'

Though beside me, my mother shivers, I know the cold truth. It's either all or none. There is no choice - if we want to win, we have to do it using the same, cruel ways that we are all against. But like I said, there is no choice.

'I'm in,' I say. I look at Finnick. Though before, he was brave and strong, I can see him now for what he really is - a confused thirteen year old boy. I go over to him and give him a hug, and kiss his forhead. 'Don't worry. Everything's going to be alright,' I whisper.

He stares at me with... such a disappointed look. He seems devastated and hollow - what is he thinking? As I see tears form in his eyes, he runs out the door back into the dark hallway.

'What's wrong with him?' I ask Paylor. She shrugs, but I can see the pain behind her actions. Like she too is hiding something. 'I have to go now. Not make Plutarch suspicious,' she mutters before closing the door behind her.

I finally turn to Mom.

'Please, tell me the truth. You at least owe me that,' I plead.

Mom looks at me with such sad eyes that my heart drops even before I hear what she is saying. 'Beetee has crossed to the other side.'

WHAT? I... can't kill him. Gale would never forgive me. How am I better than Gale, if I kill his own son? The one person he truly loves?

It is the next sentence that Mom whispers which forces a deep stab of sorrow into my heart. 'And so has Gale.'

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