I won't be your Cry Baby
I was laying in bed with my tears falling on the soft pillow .
I can hear some stepts coming closer and closer. "Maybe it's just Jesse trying to reach the bathroom" I thought .
But it wasn't, and it was exactly the person I needed to avoid now , Zach.
I was facing the doorway so he could easily see me crying but I wasn't that stupid, I didn't wanted him to see me like this , Weak. So I turned to the other side now facing the empty wall, he was there, in the door step , I hoped he wouldn't notice me , but for fuck's sake , he did. Now I have to come out with lies and try to get my voice back to normal so he won't notice I was crying .
" Peach, come on, the dinner is ready , Jesse is here as well, we're gonna eat our dinner together you know" he said happily
" I'm not hungry." I replied
" Oh come on babe , we've been here a million times , you have to eat " what nerve does he has that's always trying to tear my faith apart by giving me nicknames
As if he is in love with me . I thought
" Zachary I'm not hungry and that's it."
" Peach, are you ok?" he said softly
" Why wouldn't I be ?" I replied
" Cut the shit. Tell me what happened , I can see you're upset as fuck , who you trying to fool?"
That moment I just lost my patience , I got up of the bed and looked straight into his eyes
" Why are you cryin-"
" Zach leave it, Jesse is here, go enjoy his company, I don't wanna fight"
" No one is fighting , I just want you to be okay and tell me what happened" he said with mercy
" Fuck off Zach, you say that as if you give two shits about me " I said while tears were running down my cheeks
" Peach why are like this? Of course I give more than two shits about you, you're my girlfriend, I love you and don't you think for a second that I don't care about you"
" So what if I'm your girlfriend, you never fucking mean those I love you words and I'm fucking sick of it, I'm sick of your toxic game , do you think I'm that stupid?" I said with anger in my eyes.
" What is that supposed to mean?" he yelled
" It means that I fucking knew all this time that I'm just your cover doll, a wall between Jesse and you so you can get over each other, isn't it? "
He didn't say anything, instead his eyes were now facing the floor.
" I know and I knew you still have feelings for Jesse, I just wished I didn't get involved in this fucking relationship because I'm the one that's suffering like a piece of shit" I said while breaking down in tears , sitting on the floor with my face in my head.
" I'm so so sorry " Zach whispered after a few seconds.
" Sorry means shit , you ruined me , and there's nothing either of us can do about it, is it?"
