i lied.
here i was again, sitting in the basement. my maMAMAMAMA never came down here. i got a special request from someone and they wanted a "show". i really needed the money and they offered some cold hard cash if i just strut my stuff for a bit.
i turned on my crappy laptop camera and put a light towel over my tender pineapples. this was it, i was goiNG to get aWAY with it.
"lUCAA! i need you to puT the clOTHESS in the DDDRYER!" i heard my maMAMA scream.
"lUCAaaAA! wheRE are you, yOU iMbECILE!" she screamed again.
crAP. i was done for. she's going to thROW me into a box and ship me to noRth caRRROoLINa.
"lUCaA! i sWEar if you aRE doiNG a shOWO i wiLL riP youR pENis ofF mySELF!" her footsteps were getting closer.
i slipped on a pair of XXL shorts and stood there.
"hI! mMAMA! sorry i diD not hear you, i was-" she cut me off suddenly.
"oh. um. go do the laundry." she said calmly.
YES! HAHAHAHA, i bAMBOOZLED My mAMAMAM!
