hidden life - septiplier

○the ward○

Jacks pov.

I woke up to the smell of calorie ridden food and a sore stomach. Maybe I coul- No. I can't eat. I mustn't.

Then mark comes in the room and says "Hey babe. Your mom said you have to eat something. Or at least try,"
Fuck.
I lazily get up and walk behind him to the dining table. I sit down and my mum puts some veg on my plate. I 'smile' and say thank you, poking the food with my fork and bit. Maybe I should just eat it all and then throw it up. I'll eat a bit.  I picked up some peas on my fork and look at it. Ew.
I put it in my mouth and scowl at the taste of it. Was this fried?
What did she fry it with?
Fuck.
"Hey mum did you fry this?" I say.
"Yup," she says with a smile. I look at it and whimper, "Okay then," i have another bite, trying to forget my gained information. I look at mark, he can eat so normally. "Hey mum I'm done. Can I go for a walk?" Or a run. To burn off this.
"Um yes but mark can you go with him. It's getting late," she took my plate and went to washing the plates with Marks mum.

I sigh.
I can't even exercise now. We both put our shoes on and go out of the door.
"I know what you were gonna do you know?" He says before we reach the gate. "Oh really?" I gulp. Guilty as fuck.
"Babe I know you. You were just gonna run the food off."
"Yeah whatever." I put my head down.
"So. How are you doing?"
"I'm good would be a bit of an overstatement,"
"Yeah well. I'm here for ya, forever and always," i smile a bit and peck him on the cheek. He chuckles and wraps an arm around my waist. I lay my head on his shoulder as we walk.

I love him.

When i wake up in start to pack my bags slowly. I'm due at the ward today.
I sniffled a bit as i tried to work through my silent tears.I can't live without mark for a week. It's going to be horrible. Maybe they just want me gone.
Oh my god.
Of course.
They're just trying to get rid of me.

I stop packing and put my hands on my face. And being the crybaby I am.
I cry.
This wakes mark up and he rushes to my side. "Baby what's up?" He says in concern. "A-are you trying to get rid of me!?"
"No baby calm down,"
"Calm down! B-but you're the one making me go to a fucking mental hospital!" I screamed in blind rage and hurt. "Jack breathe. Please."
Only then I realised that I wasn't breathing. I exhaled and sobbed into my hands again. My mum came rushing in and she saw me in Marks arms. She sighed and came to me. Laying a hand on my head "jacky it's gonna be okay. C'mere" mark let go and i clinged to my mother. She kissed my head and looked at me.
"You have helped us so much and you miraculously got us here. We are not getting rid of you. You just need to get better, we don't know how to help you,"
I nodded and let go of her. "Continue packing love. I love you," she then went to the kitchen to make breakfast. I then looked to mark. He looked concerned as usual.
"Babe I promise it will be okay," i just shrugged and continued to pack. I hid my blade in a sock. I'm gonna need it.

I purged breakfast which I feel bad for but I had to. Mark looked so proud when i ate it. But I just had to fuck it up. After that mark drove me to the ward. He kissed me goodbye and a nurse showed me to my room.
"So jack. I'm going to have to check your bag. Do you cut, take drugs or drink," she said as if rehearsed.
"I-I cut," she nods pulling out my blade. "Well there'll be none of that,"
Aww fuck. Wwhhyyyyyy.
I do drink alot. But I stopped when me and mark got together. I miss it. So much. "Okay jack. You must come to the cafeteria for your meds and lunch at 12:30. And if you want you may get your diagnosis papers to read for yourself." with that.
She leaves and takes my blade too. I sit on the bed and fall back. I close my eyes but I can't sleep. I decide to wander around a bit.
I open my door and i walk with my head down through the halls. Right then I bump into a girl my age, she looks at me with anger and pushes me down. "I-I'm sorry,"
"Yeah whatever fag" she scoffs. I gulp and get back up. Wiping a stray tear.
Geez. Well done jack. You've already fucked up. I shuffle down the hall and bit more until I reach what I think is the cafeteria. They serve out what looks like diabetes on a plate.
"Hey I'm Allie!" A girl comes out of nowhere. I jump and reply. "J-jack"
"Hi jack. What are you here for," i shrug and get a bit scared. "That's okay. I have-"
"I-I gotta go," i run back to my room as fast as I can. That was too much. Ugh I want mark. I slide down the door and cry. This place wasn't that big so of course a nurse just had to hear me sobbing. Some dude knocked on the door. I stayed quiet and moved from the door. "You okay in there, I'm gonna have to come in if you don't reply,"
"I-I'm fine!" I cried. He opened the door and i hid my head. "Fine. Lunch is in 10 minutes, I think you might need your medication,"
What is that supposed to mean.
Jeez what a jerk. I climb into the bed and stare at the ceiling for a bit until lunch.

I shuffle to the cafeteria with puffy eyes. The person hands me my meds and a tray. They give me chicken and salad and i gulp looking at the huge portion, i sit down and swallow my pill and poke at my food. I can see people staring. Obviously there's nobody else here with an eating problem. I eat the whole thing and then I start to gag. I leave my tray and bolt to the bathrooms. Then the same nurse from earlier blocks me. "Why are you going in," he says firmly. I point to my mouth. "Ew. Just swallow it wierdo," he was really getting on my fucking nerves now. I push him out of the way and run into a cubicle. Throwing my lunch up. After I'm done he grabs the back of my hoodie and drags me out. He threw me down and shouted "i told you to swallow it you little bitch. Fucking psycho," i cried and hugged my legs against the wall. I was cornered. Oh god he's gonna beat me. No no no no. I want mark so badly right now. "Get up,"
"I said GET UP!"he grabbed my wrist and i winced as he dragged me up, he pushed me away and I ran to my room.

What a great first day.