Balance | Daniel Seavey AU

F O U R T E E N | showcase

"Mason, you don't have to..." He insisted, placing a hand over mine. I shook my head, taking in a few deep breaths.

"I feel like I at least owe you that," I told him. "I... Lied. I do have a sibling– well, had a sibling." He nodded, not saying anything so I continued. "His name was Matthew, and he was four years older than me? I'm pretty sure he was, and he and my dad were both drafted for the military, and the reason why I have that—" I nodded my head towards the jacket "—is to have something that belonged to him, my dad's one had burnt in the fire, and that one was left home.

"Matthew and I were close, and we had that rare brother-sister bond that most siblings don't have, and when he was drafted, I sort of already knew at some point that I'd never see him again and that scared me." My voice had begun to shake as I tried to retell the story. "My dad was also close to me, heck, I was close with all of them, even my mom and when we got the letter that they died in battle—an explosion from an abandoned house, it crushed the both of us, but my mom took it in a way that she felt like she lost all three of the people she loved... She didn't see me as a daughter, just someone living in her home." I didn't realize tears were already streaming down my cheeks.

"My mom uses Matthew as a way to make me feel guilty when I'm not doing something she likes, why do you think I went for the scholarship? My mom could've easily afforded the tuition fee with her new job and how progressive it's been, but she didn't want me to pursue art," I told him, beginning to feel angry, "She thought... She thought art was stupid and a waste of time, that it had no way of supporting my financial issues in the future... And the only times she's called me were to ask for something."

Tears had stained my cheeks, and the bile in my throat kept me from breathing properly. I forgot that I was telling Daniel about it, and felt like I was telling myself, as if I was opening up a wound.

He didn't say anything for a minute; I was sure he was processing it all in. Once he did, he pulled me into a hug and all my walls crumbled as I continued to weep on his shoulder, his hand rubbing small circles on my back.

We stayed like that for a good minute, and I finally calmed down, my eyes swollen and my head heavy as I pulled away, sending a grateful smile to him. "Agh gosh, that was... Wow." He chuckled, nodding. "Thanks for listening... Never thought I'd ever tell anyone."

"Never say never," he said, before grinning, but before he could say anything I lifted my hand to stop him.

"No."

"I was going to ask if you wanted to go to that café again?" He asked. "I have a few songs I'd want to perform—"

"I say a boom boom, now let me hear you say way–" Jack stopped when he saw the situation between Daniel and I, his cheeks blushing a bright pink as he lowered his lifted arms down to his side, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. "Did I ruin your moment? That's kind of my job as that one single friend, I knew it wasn't nothing when I came here–"

"Jack, would you like to join us for dinner?"

"And be the third wheel?" He scoffed, as if what Daniel asked was the most offensive thing.

"I'll pay for your food–"

"What are you doing guys? We have dinner to get!" I couldn't help but laugh, shaking my head at him as he walked out of the dorm. Daniel stood up and turned to me, moving to my closet and grabbing the jacket from its hanger, before extending it towards me.

"He's proud of you, they both are," he stated in a form of reassurance. I nodded, taking the jacket and putting on, before gesturing for us to leave.

—

"I swear, my hair's hasn't always been curly," Jack said, laughing. "But I use it as an excuse to add a few inches to my height."

"It's obvious you got a perm, to be honest," I admitted, eyeing his curly locks. "They're highlighted for Pete's sake."

"And I can't believe you were blonde," I gaped at Daniel, "You look more like a baby with blonde hair I guess." We had ordered our food, and were waiting for dessert now. I glanced over at the stage to find someone else performing. The waiter from before had informed us that ever since Daniel went up to perform, a few other people did so as well.

"I'm thinking of becoming a regular here, you know?" Daniel said out of the blue. "It's not that far from campus, and I need to experience anyways."

"You are?"

"Yeah, I can perform covers or my own songs, I could probably have Jack be with me if he wants," he said, gesturing to his friend who wiggled his brows in agreement.

"That would be cool," I nodded.

"And maybe you could sell your art," he then suggested, and I paused. Showcase my art? I was okay with showing it to the school board as it was a requirement to get in, but for other people? It's always been personal when it comes to my art, of course if you excluded the random and unimportant doodles I did when bored in lectures. Most of have a deeper meaning to them, and only a few people have seen it.

"No, I can't do that," I shook my head.

"Why not?"

"You've seen how reluctant I was when showing it to you, Daniel," I told him. "I'll... I'll do something about my art, just not now."

then," he sighed, before turning to his friend, "Do you wanna perform?" His friend nodded. They talked to the waiter and went up to the stage. It was Daniel in the guitar and Jack by the microphone, but he got an extra one so the both could sing.

"Hey, we're Daniel and Jack from Laguna Coast and we'll be performing a song for you guys tonight, hope you enjoy."

I watched from the table, but I wasn't paying attention to the song.

If I showcased my art, will that mean anything for me? It's like I'm publishing a diary; a diary full of secrets and thoughts that no one else knew about. It was as if I was walking around naked, revealed to everyone around.

I'm scared to do that. I'm not prepared for the judgement or criticism that I will receive when I showcase my art. I know at some point I'll have to do it, but right now, wasn't the moment.

—🌹—

ITS 00:00 WHEN I UPLOAD THIS IN MY TIME

*me watching secret love song cover* *a tear falls* IM NOT CRYING IM JUST INCREDIBLY SWEATY

legit, i searched the video for a gif but stayed for the song cuz damn guys, its such a good cover and lovey is gorgeous and im in love ?#$!!?# 

anywayyssss..... WE ARE CLOSE TO 700 READS hoooommmiiigawd, honestly i never actually thought i'd be able to reach it so fast, but you guys proved me wrong and hopefully we can go further together :) 

and like i said before, this book is going to be at least 20 or more chapters, but i don't want it to be over 30 because that'll be dragging the story along unnecessarily tbh. 

don't forget to vote comment share and add to your library. i love you. i thank you. you're awesome. hope you have an amazing day :)x