Chapter 10: Pain and Alcohol

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Elizabeth

Rejected.
Rejection.

The two words were roaming wildly within my mind. He had rejected me. Using someone else. That jerk had sent someone else out to do his dirty work. He had admitted how unwanted I was, through some supermodel chick. He didn't even have the courage to do it himself.

A pretty red head. Her body was perfect, she had no imperfections really, with her porcelain skin and perfect complexion.He was picking her over me.

Some stranger over his fate chosen soul mate.

I didn't even know her name, just her face. That lean body apparently had proved useful in stealing my mate. I wasn't surprised about the fact that he didn't want me. Being unwanted wasn't a new feeling. I was used to people shutting me out and pushing me away. I guess I just hadn't expected it to be my own mate. Marie howled in pain. I flinched at the noise.

"He never wanted you, he has always only ever wanted me." She turned around has if to walk away but before she did, she looked over her shoulder with a sly smirk. "He is rejecting you. You're obviously not good enough for him, you are just worthless. He even told me himself."

I sighed deeply, tears threatening to spill out. I had thought that there was a connection when we were in that closet. He had wanted me to join his pack even.

Maybe it was all apart of his game. I mean he did have to keep up his reputation, right?

Marie whimpered yet again has the memory of the recent event coursed through my mind. I stared down at the water that was several feet below my feet. The concrete bridge like structure was my seat, like always.

My heart was in pain. My wolf was in pain. I was simply just a mess. I had gotten the news an hour before school had let out, probably to ensure that I wouldn't see my "mate". I had ran out into the woods, straight to where I was. Tears unwillingly ran down my cheeks, I was trying to hard not to let them out but luck just wasn't on my side.

My feet were dangling over and images of letting myself fall flashed in my sight. I would only be injured if I let that happen though. It would only result in pain, not death. I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not.

Pain.

Maybe pain was something I deserved. My "mate" certainly thought so, seeing as he was the one creating the most pain. I sighed once again, scooting myself farther off the edge. The jagged rocks below would be sure to leave a mark. They could even possibly cut deep enough to draw enough blood to.... I let the thought trail off because I didn't want myself to admit to myself the outcome that I wanted. It was about a twenty foot drop. I closed my eyes and pushed myself completely off of the concrete.

In that moment I realized why mates could never survive on their own. Even without the full mate bond, the connection is there, the need is there.

Meeting your mate is like a free ticket to happiness and losing your mate is like a slingshot straight to hell. It was like losing the only thing that could ever make you happy, it was breathtaking and intense. It was pain.

"I deserve pain." I whispered to myself once more.

The cold of the water surrounded me. I didn't open my eyes, I didn't want to see the mess that I had created. I was cold, yet I felt numb at the same time. I didn't feel any pain like I should have. Though, the pain in my heart seemed to impossibly increase.

I wasn't unfamiliar with death, maybe I was dead. Maybe this is what dying felt like.

*Flashback*

"A mate's bond is extremely strong. So strong that it cannot be broken." He said, wisdom shining deep in his eyes.

"How strong Daddy? Has strong as you?" I watched myself ask in my five year old tone.

"Stronger than me. So strong that when you get hurt, it won't be you that feels it first." he answered, taking me into his arms.

"What do you mean? I won't feel my boo-boos?" I questioned once again.

"You know when you fall and get an ouchy?" He paused while I watched younger version me nod, "You won't feel the ouchy, your mate will, so he knows to come and protect you."

*Flashback Over*

My eyes snapped open, bless the ability to see underwater, once I realized what that meant.

I didn't want him to hurt because of me. Sure, he didn't care about me but I still didn't want him to hurt. I swam until my body was resting upon the gravel of the creek bank. I slowly sat up as a tingling feeling settled on my body.

Red? Why was the water running red?

I ran my eyes over my body to find the source. Pain. My arm. So much pain. This is what I deserve. Tears were streaming rapidly down my cheeks. I deserve every ounce of pain. Everything.

Marie whimpered once more. Wolves didn't like to see their human in pain.

You can't do this to yourself. To us. She howled after she spoke. She was trying desperately to get my human to calm down so we could heal without her taking control. Marie knew how much I hated when she pushed my human aside. I hated feeling so controlled and helpless.

"Why does the bad stuff always happen to me? I whispered aloud. I was trembling from the cold and the loss of blood. I frantically looked around for something to cover my arm with but my sight was getting far too blurry.

"I have to do this. It will be better for the both of us."

Cameron

I lazily pressed the bottle against my lips. The familiar burn made its way across my tounge but I held no reaction. The sensation was one in which I had grown quite fond of. I drank to much, yet it never seemed to be enough.

Every hasty swig was illegal seeing has I had yet to turn of age. Everyone knew about my addiction to the rush, but I had yet to find someone who was willing to try and stop me, probably because I was their Alpha. My reputation was also once that people didn't dare to invade.

My father wasn't letting me out to help search for my mate. Sarah or was it Samantha? Well either way, she was being held for questioning. I wish I could have been out searching instead of feeding my addiction. I honestly didn't even know why I wasn't allowed to help find my own mate, it was just my father's orders. Since, he was the former alpha and he was my father, he apparently had the power to boss everyone around.

I huffed, tossing the emptied bottle aside and picked up another. Lucas growled as yet another surge of pain went through my arm. I didn't know the source of the random pains but I had chosen to ignore them, even though Lucas didn't seem to enjoy them.

I chugged the remains of the bottle, not bothering to even consider my Alpha duties. I closed my eyes and blindly reached for yet another one. I didn't even know what I was drinking all I knew was that it was making my mind cloudy, in a good way. I heard the door swing open, nearly cracking it off of the hinges.

I opened my eyes, it was Hunter. His eyes were yellow, signaling that his wolf was in control. His hair was poking out in strange directions and his breathing was frantic.

"She's gone."

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