Shatter

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Chapter Nineteen

The ground was wet.  The earth smelled musky and slightly like pine.  The trees towered over our heads and a cool breeze stirred the still air.  There was no sunlight, but sunlight didn’t seem appropriate after all the people we had killed.  All sixteen of us darted through the trees, hooting and hollering because for the first time in forever we were free.  The security from the mental hospital had stopped chasing us once we reached the woods but we hadn’t stopped.

We ran because it felt good to run, because we could run.  My sides burned and I felt dizzier and dizzier by the minute.

Finally, we came to a small river.  All of us jumped in to rid ourselves of our scent.

“Melinda?”  One of the girls in our group called out.  I turned to see Urbana glancing at me with a fearful expression.  “Toxemia,” she whispered.

“What?”  Ronny whispered, then his eyes snapped to me.  “Fuck,” he swore as if he was coming out of a daze.  “Jaison!”

My shoulders slumped, feeling as though the weight of the world was on my shoulders.  I fell to my knees in the river, the water around me turned a pinkish orange color.  Jaison was at my side in a matter of seconds.  He lifted me up and carried me to the edge of the river.

“Mel?”  He asked, his eyes frantic.  “The boss, he shot you when you killed him.”

I coughed, feeling blood work its way up my throat and spill down my chin.  Jaison took my hand in his.  I could feel him trying to heal me, but still my eyes were closing slowly, and I was becoming numb.

“Mel?”  Jaison called, bringing his hand up to my face and pushing away strands of hair.  “Why isn’t it working?”  Jaison yelled to no one in particular.

Urbana stepped forward her eyes scanning my body.  “The stomach acid is mixing with her blood and the bullet is lodged in her stomach walls,” she explained.

“What do I do?”  Jaison yelled, sounding frantic.

“There’s nothing you can do,” Urbana said solemnly.  “This happened what, fifteen minutes ago?  It’s probably only because of the shock she wasn’t writhing in pain the second she was shot.”

“Fifteen people with fucking powers and none of you can help her?”  Jaison yelled.

“You’re the healer,” Ronny bit back.

“You’re not going to die,” Jaison insisted forcefully.  “Tell her she’s not going to die.”  Jaison’s now grey eyes darted between Ronny and Neveah.

Ronny’s eyes glazed over for just a second before they shifted back into focus.  His jaw clenched and he forced his eyes away.

“No,” Jaison said, gritting his teeth and turning his attention back to me.  “No, Mel, you’re not going to die.”

“Jase,” I said weakly.  “I’m sorry.”

“No, Mel, why are you sorry?”  Jaison’s eyes were filling slowly with water, his jaw was locked tight with determination.

“You tried so hard to get…” I paused to cough, more blood coming out of my mouth.  “You did this so we could get out and now it’s pointless.”

“No,” he insisted again.  “This wasn’t all for nothing, you’re going to be okay, it’s just taking a little longer for me to heal you.”

Austin stepped forward and locked his gaze on Jaison.  “Try again,” Austin insisted.

Jaison took a few deep breaths and closed his eyes.  He slid my hands into his own and squeezed slightly.  Austin seemed deep in focus as he enhanced Jaison’s power.  Jaison gritted his teeth in pain.

“Jase, stop,” I demanded.  “Maybe…maybe this is for the best.”

“Don’t,” Jaison said through gritted teeth.  “Don’t say that.”

“I can’t make it out there.”

“Yes, you can and you will.”  I shook my head at his words.

“I got what I wanted,” I said softly, feeling my body grow numb and my mind start to fail.  My heart beat was slowing inside my chest as the acid filled my veins.  I fisted my hands into the grass, feeling the damp blades slip in between my fingers.  “I got out and I got to meet you… the one exception to my gift.”

Jaison burrowed his head into my shoulder and sobbed softly.  I tried to raise my hand to comfort him, but I was too tired and moving was such a daunting task in this state.  Tears slid down my face, whether they were his tears or my own, I couldn’t tell.

“Try not to miss me,” I murmured.  “And try not to die.”

Jaison pulled me closer towards him as if he could keep me here if he just held on tight enough.

“Don’t go, Mel,” he said one last time, his voice a low whimper.  He pulled back and I saw his grey green eyes red and watery.  I gave a small smile as I felt my eyes slide shut.

Dying was like drifting away.  Going somewhere peaceful, losing touch of who I was and forgetting all my troubles.  Dying was easy and after the hard life I lived I thought that I deserved an easy death.  Losing Jaison hurt and still kind of does, but it’s more like a shadow of an ache, like the pain is just a memory of what pain used to be.

Dying means that there’s no real measure of time.  Not like when I was stuck in the dark and damp cell and couldn’t tell when time was passing it was more like time just didn’t exist.  I don’t know how old Jaison was when he died.  I just know that there was one day when I was out in the backyard of my childhood home, with sun shining down on me and a warm breeze rocking the grasses.  The sound of a lawnmower in the distance and my mother beside me on my father’s lap made me feel at peace.  Then Jaison walked up the hill and jumped over the gate like he had done it a thousand times before and he never left.

Dying gave me the peace that I so desperately needed and I think eventually Jaison realized that I was right and that death was the best option for me.  In death, I could touch whoever I wanted and never had to feel like I was a monster.  In death I had my mother and my father and Jaison.  I had my home and never worried about my punishment or the boss.  The life I used to live was hard, harder than most but I wouldn’t have given it up willingly.  If it was possible, I would live forever with Jaison but in life, you don’t get forever but in death, we have eternity.

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The End.

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