Envious of the People Below - Spencer List

My wings

I am so sick of this, my therapist thinking that I need to write a diary, I'd rather die again but maybe in a different way. I sat down on my balcony my wings surrounding myself for warmth. I looked down at the city lights beyond the cloud bank and sighed.

I'm dead by the way. Yes, I'm up in the sky... with that big dude god. by the way he's a total asshole.

I guess I should tell you about myself, my name is Spencer List, I died last year, I play basketball and I'm quite a fan of Harry Potter, I was an actor. I was born in Florida and spent some of my years in New York and LA, my family and I moved permanently to New York City for my sisters job as an actor. Things started going down hill from the age of 13, now I'm 19, dead and stuck with black wings, they do however go with my leather jacket.

Like I said, I have black wings instead of white or red. Now let me say this, there are a lot of Black Winged people in heaven, they just stay away from this area, that's what god says anyway. I know for a fact that they are terrified of me.

OH the wings... there a little hard to explain, but I suppose I should say, so it makes sense.

They basically tell everyone how you died.

So the pretty angels get white wings. White means you've died of natural causes and disease, age, cancer stuff like that. Basically you're considered 'innocent' by the judging and you're sent to live in a place of harmony, choirs and bright lights.

Red wings tell you which one was murdered or killed in an accident, those people get the most sympathy from the head angels and god. You should've seen New York heaven at rush hour last week. So many flowers and "I'm sorry you were stabbed and shot" cards it was enough to make me vomit. They live in pretty houses that are big and grand.

And then there's the black ones... they tell you which one died on their own accord. So we're the kids who are depressed and the ones that no body understands because we think differently and hate our lives and don't appreciate what we have.

I'm one of those people. We don't get any pity from the big guy, if anything he's angry at us for giving our life away and leaving our family. If he actually knew what was going on maybe he would understand it a little bit better but like I told you, he's an asshole.

Black winged angels houses and towns are the bad side of the neighbour hood. Filled with rehab centres and therapy offices. I live on the out skirts of Black Wing territory, it's not amazing but it's home and I'm right on the edge over looking the city. I can sit on my balcony and look down and see the ruined places, smoking ash rising to the sky. I absolutely love seeing the hustle and bustle. But there was someone down there who's different...

I muttered under my breath, "Roman"