What Not To Do When You're In Love

09 | Ignorant

09 | Ignorant

Islam is the way of life. It instructs the way things should be done in order to prove ourselves deserving of a place in Jannah when the time comes.

Contrary to Kuffar beliefs, and I'm sure every Muslim would agree on this, Islam is an extremely convenient way of life. Allah has made rules sufficient for us to balance Deen and Dunya, and our Great Prophet has shown us easiest ways for the same.

How lucky a person of Muslim faith is can never really be described, because for everything we have systematic procedures according to situation. Masha Allah. There are ways to do things laid down, to be followed for eternity. There are things which need to be done in a certain way, and also, for our convenience, Alhamdulillah, sometimes there is room for our human desires. Hence in some matters the rules are rigid, for our own good, and in others, they are modifiable.

Such rules are introduced to us by parents of our culture as options that, although existent and halal, aren't as secure as the other, and therefore inadvisable if other options are available.

One of the most controversial topics for vainly motivated idle Kuffar is how arranged marriages are prevalent in Islam. In Arab and Asian cultures it is widely popular for parents to marry their children according to their own terms instead of letting them do it for themselves. We prefer to have arranged marriages for our children and siblings instead of love marriages, because it is safer, if going by the Sunnah way of approaching this matter.

Love has been made halal, unless it leads to something haraam. And isn't it better that a man and woman like each other before they're married? In my opinion it is.

And hence I'd die for Hafsa and my brother to get married one day, because she wanted it to happen . . . if it weren't for my husband who probably wouldn't like that idea.

I couldn't think of a way to tell him. He'd trusted me to find out what his sister wanted, and instead of just telling him what she'd said, I was pairing her with my own brother?

My intention wasn't negative, I only wanted best for Hafsa. To be honest I wouldn't ever have let my mind imagine them as a couple, but all that changed when Hafsa expressed her interest. And she wasn't wrong when she said she could decide things for herself; if she didn't want anything but a good man of sufficient earning, I was sure Jebrail would be great for her.

So here I was in a crisis as big as the one I'd placed in front of Hafsa : how to tell Hasan to think once about what Hafsa was saying she wanted, instead of assuming and being so sure of what he thought she needed.

When he came back from office and, like usual, had the cup of coffee I brought him that he never really asked for, I was planning a conversation with him that could potentially go very badly.

With a deep breath and a small Bismillaah I spoke.

"Hasan I talked to Hafsa today."

"Oh," he said, and his brows tensed. "Did you talk about . . . "

"Hasan," I said, not facing him. "Have you ever heard the phrase "money can't buy happiness?"

He placed his mug on the nightstand and laid on the bed.

"Yes I have, and I confirm that it's bullshit."

My brow went up.

"You think money can buy happiness?"

"I think money can buy you satisfaction, which leads to general happiness, unless a person links their happiness to something that can't be bought."

I have him a questioning look.