Never Letting Go (Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanoff)

Chapter 6 - There's a Secret

-March 15, 2017, late afternoon-

Natasha opened her eyes slowly, not initially realizing where she was. She looked to the pool, where Steve was hanging off the wall, floating and watching the ocean. The sky was not blue with fluffy white clouds like it had been all week. It was overcast but bright. "You swimming without me?" she called out.

"Hey, sleeping beauty," he laughed. "Come join me."

"Be right there," she said as she felt her stomach turn. Something told her to grab her phone and she headed for the house. She wasn't a step into the powder room before she felt the sickness rise in her again and she lunged for the toilet.

When she had finished throwing up, she leaned back against the wall, clammy and pale.

Oh, my God.

...There's no way.

There's no WAY.

Natasha reached for her phone.

Something like fifteen minutes had passed when Steve got curious. He couldn't put his finger on what it was about Natasha this week that made it seem like something was wrong. He wondered if that was true and if it was, why wasn't she saying anything? He thought maybe he was making too big a deal of it but he couldn't seem to let it go. And why had she taken her phone with her? - Something wasn't computing for him.

Steve got out of the pool slowly and quietly, drying off and walking into the house. He didn't hear anything. "Nat?" he called out.

Sitting in the bathroom, she hesitated but then realized she couldn't hide from him. "Yeah?"

"What's taking you so long?" he asked.

She stalled for a second. "I'll be out in a minute."

Steve walked away. Natasha's shoulders were clenched high around her neck from the tension. I hope he's not upset.

Okay... okay... this explains so many things, the throwing up, the tiredness... I can't tell Steve yet. What if I'm wrong? If I tell him and this isn't what's happening... it will be so hard for him. I should just keep it under my hat. I'll just tell him I want to go out and I'll pick up a test. Okay. Yeah, that will work. Get it together, Natasha.

Natasha willed her achy body to rise from the floor and she rinsed out her mouth again. She walked upstairs to brush her teeth and with how she felt, it felt like it took forever. She looked out the window to the pool when she walked back down the stairs and she saw Steve with his arms up over the side of the pool, just staring at the ocean. She had a bad feeling that he was upset with her, although he may never admit it. She knew his body language well enough to know his gears were turning.

"Hey," she called softly as she walked back outside. The clouds were darker now and there was an ominous feeling, not unlike the feeling in the pit of her stomach from being sick and knowing Steve might be upset with her. She knew it took a lot for him to get like that but she was hoping she was wrong.

"Hey," he said in a deep voice, not turning to look at her.

She walked over next to him and sat down on the side of the pool, sticking her feet in the water. "Looks like we might get a storm," she said softly.

Steve didn't move a muscle.

"Do you want to go out tonight?" she asked.

"Natasha," he said dryly, "are you going to act like you're not hiding something from me?" He finally looked up at her but immediately looked away. Natasha's breathing stopped, she'd never really seen him directly angry with her before, she wasn't even sure what to say. "I want to ask you what's going on but part of me is saying I don't want to know." He turned his face away from her.

"Steve..."

"I mean, I guess if I were someone else, I'd ask to see your phone... but I'm not going to do that," he sighed. "Or maybe you're upset with me that I brought up getting a dog. I don't know. We're on our honeymoon and you're hiding something from me..." He took a breath and looked straight ahead.

"Steve..."

"I didn't think you'd keep things from me," he said.

"I am keeping something from you," she said, trying to run her fingers through his hair but he leaned his head away so she couldn't. She kept her tone gentle. "I don't really want to... but..."

"But you can't help yourself, can you?" he said curtly.

"Steve, I don't think you understand," she said, it was almost a whisper. When he finally looked at her, he was surprised that she almost looked like she was smiling. She sighed and picked up her phone. "I didn't want to tell you for a reason..." She handed him her phone.

Steve looked at the screen. Pregnancy Symptoms

His eyebrows shot up. "Tasha?"

When he called her Tasha, she was thankful because it meant he wasn't angry anymore. "Oh my God," he said, looking down and grinning just a little. "I'm such an idiot..."

She watched him.

"That was so easy to see if I would have thought about it. My mind went to a bad place. I'm sorry, baby. I really am. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," she smiled. "I just didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to get your hopes up. I mean, I don't see.... I don't see how it's even possible."

He set her phone down and picked up her hand to kiss it. "We'll figure it out together." He moved in front of her and put his hands on her waist. "Come here," he said, lifting her down into the pool. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tight. "I'm sorry I was angry." He kissed her wet shoulder.

Natasha laughed. "I understand. It's hard for me to process this."

"Well, sure... because you never expected it to happen. I mean... if that is what's happening..."

"I thought we could go out and get a test tonight," she said.

"Yes, absolutely," he smiled. He held onto her tight. "I'll call for a ride." The skies opened up and sprinkles of rain started hitting them and the surface of the pool in miniature waves. Steve kissed Natasha gently and lost himself in her. Natasha moved her hands all over his neck and his back, losing herself too.

Pulling back and resting his forehead against hers, breathing hard, Steve laughed lightly. "I think you were right not to tell me... Because I'm finding it hard not to get excited."

"I knew it," she laughed.

He kissed her again before saying, "It's getting cold out here, let's go inside." The rain started coming down harder as they grabbed towels and ran for the house. Inside, Steve wrapped a towel around both of them and they stood at the window watching the storm.