for your eyes only.

in a.m

(repost from mb but edited )

this is;

to the ones who are down and lonely at 12 am. overthinking is slowly killing you.a needle pricked too hard and sinked in deeper and deeper through that icy cold thin skin. thinking that you knew better,should have done better and could have done better. thinking that whatever the future holds,it's gonna be  much worse. praying too hard failed you probably. wanting to just stab through that chest without hesitation. these emotions have been hidden under the clouds for too long that the clouds turned dark and heavy. letting out the thunder and rain throughout the night. it's harsh and angry at the world and self. predicting the future is terrifying with all the 'what ifs ' running around madly and endlesssly. hoping someone would stay and help you but no one knows. that someone would sit there in the silence without saying a word. hold your shaking body and wipe those tears away. that someone would answer your 2 am calls even though you've interrupted their beauty sleep. they wouldn't mind talking to you if that made you feel better . just a bit . sadly there ain't someone like this. someone to trust this much. the wall of trust that you've built has been broken and destroyed too many times that it's uncountable. you can't afford another damaged brick.
those bricks were protecting yourself now there isn't many left.
to the ones who are down and lonely. know that you aren't the only ones.
i dare say that i'm one of you.
the world is honestly fucked up and there is bad out there. real bad.
times are hard and expect much worse.
there are days ahead when the flood will arrive and arise.
i'm sorry you need to face this but you have swim to survive this flood.
make it out alive
you can then say that you've defeated your enemies and fears with much pride to hold.

\\ ngl i'm terrible w advice but know that it's okay to just let those tears swim into the ocean silently\\

p.s sorry for all the editing ugh