Take Me Home | ✔

Chapter Twenty-Seven (unedited)

I felt downright terrible.

     I felt like a kid again, a kid who just stole from the forbidden cookie jar when she wasn't allowed to but did it anyway because of that rush -- just the rush -- of complete and utter adventure of doing something you know you're not supposed to do. I wasn't supposed to kiss Eli but as far as my limited knowledge of kissing went, the best kisses were supposedly unplanned. 

   Was Eli a good kisser? 

  I'd rather not delve on the specifics. But he definitely left a lasting impression. 

  As I stared at Elliot and he stared right back at the end of the hospital hallway, my stomach twisted into knots more tangled than my headphones. Guilt spread lively in my veins but I couldn't find the reason why. He wasn't even mine to feel guilty for. 

    I choked out a response, moving one foot in front of the other. "Hey. How long have you been standing there?" 

     I notice now that he's holding two cups of coffee in cheap styrofoam mugs. 

     "Long enough to see what just happened," he said. 

     "You mean... you saw?" 

     "That kiss? Of course I saw, I have eyes too, y'know," he said calmly. 

     When I didn't say anything, he stretched out one arm, offering me the cup of coffee. I took it in my hands, shoving Eli's quarters in my pocket. The coffee looked stale and oddly like a muddy puddle off the side of the highway. But hey, it was still coffee. 

    "And speaking of eyes, he totally had them open," Elliot said casually, staring at me hard. "Just thought I'd let you know." 

    "Oh really?" 

   "Yeah. Of course. You can totally trust me on this Vienna -- his eyes were wide open." 

      "And that's a bad thing?" 

   "Hey," he said soothingly, "I'm just looking out for you. I don't want you to get hurt." 

   “And if a guy’s eyes are open during a kiss, it means I’m going to get hurt?”

    "Not necessarily, but eventually."

    "Are you trying to ruin the moment, El?" 

    He twisted his face. "Don't call me that, alright? It makes me sound all -- feminine. And only if it's working," he suddenly cracked a light grin that told me that he wasn't bothered at all by the kiss, and I tried not letting this get to me, but I couldn't help what feelings I had. 

     "Anyway, we should probably get going. It's getting pretty late and we still have Nevada to cover," he told me, running a limp hand through his hair, momentarily shifting it from its usual shape. After seconds of staring at it, I realized I liked it better poofy than flattened down. 

    He started walking away to the hospital elevators, and there was nothing more I wanted to do than scream from the top of my lungs that I was slowly liking him more than I should. 

   But of course I didn't do that. 

   . . . . . . . . . . 

It’s two am, and Elliot’s driving this time. The car feels awfully empty without Eli, and there’s a significant gap between Elliot and I that only he could fill. I’d forgotten how lonely this trip had seemingly been until he was forced to tag along. Before, I’d never thought twice about taking him with us. We were just taking him home, just like Elliot was doing for me. But now, I couldn’t deny it no matter how much it confused me.