The Way We Feel

Chapter 6

"Hello?" I called into the house, holding the door open so that Jeff could follow me inside.

"In here!" came a voice—not Madelyn's voice.

The house smelled of garlic, and it had been hours since I'd eaten, so my stomach was rather loud about its needs.

"Jesus," Jeff said, hearing the sound over the click of the front door shutting behind us. He eyed my stomach. "If I didn't know you'd eaten a mere four hours ago, I'd think you were dying."

I narrowed my gaze at him, but couldn't help the smile that lifted my lips. "Shut up."

This kind of hunger had come home with me every day this week—the first week on the new film. Chris had been working us hard, and because of all the stunts, the role was more physically demanding than I'd initially anticipated. Which was silly of me, I realized now, because this was an action film. And after doing Dunkirk, well... I should've been a bit more prepared.

It was still harder this time though. I'd somewhat adjusted to leaving Mads and Lila every day—and so far, everything had been fine—but part of my struggle had become pure exhaustion. Though I wouldn't say this film was that much more demanding than Dunkirk, I think things had been easier when I was younger. When I could sleep through the night, and I wasn't woken at the crack of dawn by a baby crying, and when I could come home and crash rather than be expected to take care of my daughter after my wife had done so for a full day.

And I wasn't complaining. Not at all. I was happy to see my family when I returned home every night. I felt lucky that I had them to come home to—especially remembering that time when all I had to look forward to was returning to an empty hotel room, where it felt like a constant reminder that I was alone.

No, I was happy for the life I was currently leading. But a little more sleep wouldn't have gone astray.

"Hey," Glenne said, glancing over at us from the counter as we walked into the kitchen. She had Lila, who looked wide awake, propped up in her lap.

I looked from her to Mads, who was standing at the stove over a pot of boiling water. "Hey."

Mads smiled at me, and I could see the exhaustion I was feeling in her gaze.

"You cooked?" I asked, surprised. We'd taken to eating sandwiches or ordering take away for the most part since Lila was born.

"It's just pasta," Mads said, off-handedly. "Hardly a full meal."

"I tried to tell her it wasn't necessary," Glenne interjected. Jeff was now standing at her side, making faces at Lila, who was staring back at him with wide, curious eyes. "We would've been fine with ordering something in."

"I've got to get back into the rhythm of it at some point," Mads said, dipping a mesh spoon into the water and giving it a stir. "Figured I might as well use the advantage of company to force myself." She looked at me with a small smile. "And besides, it's the last day of your first week on the job. Take-out wouldn't have been as celebratory."

I smiled despite myself, and carried my aching muscles over to her so that I could greet her—thank her—properly.

Mads smiled into the kiss and pulled away more quickly than I would've liked. But given the company standing just behind us, I understood why.

We didn't say anything to each other beyond another shared look of hello, of I missed you, of I can't wait until later. Mads had texted me earlier to say that Glenne had stopped by, and that she had invited her to stay for dinner so I should make sure to tell Jeff. I figured there was no point arguing the matter since she'd already asked Glenne, but at the same time, I wondered why she'd done it. I knew she was just as exhausted—if not more so—than I was, and having people over, even if they were just Jeff and Glenne, was extra effort neither of us was particularly up to these days.