Shy Boy

Chapter 7

No matter how he would come off, he found himself in the same position. Stuck and paralyzed without the right words ever coming out.

He could never really make a move.

The time spent away from her was the more likely the better. It wouldn't work out, he figured.

Joshua was awkward and timid; his personality wasn't easily changed. Trying very hard was something parlous that he would not risk.

It was hard, he thought silently, looking at the spine of the books while sitting with his legs crossed; equally as his back was resting on it on his side from the lower shelf.

He was miserably pondering about his life and how he shouldn't get involve or try in the first place. It was useless.

"See, this is what I'm afraid of," Joshua uttered lowly to himself.

None of this would have happened if he just kept his distance because then his feelings for her wouldn't grow as strong any more than just an admiring crush.

The more he thought about it, the more frustrated he was.

He couldn't understand his own feelings. To him, she was like the butterfly with the butterfly fluttering effect inside of his stomach.

He locked it and hid it. The times that he contained inside of him, it wasn't anything like this before. Now, he was embarrassed.

Joshua sighed, ruffling his hair with both hands and wishing he was thinking about anything but her. Then shortly afterward, he pushed his glasses up of his nose.

A confident guy wouldn't have this problem, but he was an ordinary shy guy.

Homework was more productive to do than thinking about a conflict in his mind, but he couldn't put his focus onto that.

His eyes stared desolating into his mind blanked out. And that look stayed on him for a while.

Joshua didn't know how long he sat there. The time didn't occur to his mind as he didn't move from his position. He didn't pay attention to anything else whatsoever.

There was someone who just walked this way, their eyes and attention on looking for a book on a bookshelf. He didn't have to look to know that.

Going back to his thoughts, he thought, Maybe I should just tell Scooter that I don't have it in me. I appreciate his efforts in boosting me to have the confidence, but something in me just couldn't do it.

I don't know how I'm supposed to open up. It's not me.

While he sat unknowingly, someone said "Hey," and slowly he turned his eyes. 

Now wary, he was caught off guard as he didn't believe what he was seeing. She was there looking down at him, and his breath halted. There was panic that he felt not knowing what he's supposed to do. 

"I'm sorry, am I bothering you?"

Joshua didn't know how to respond to Coral. He just stared at her. 

"Weren't you the guy who came by to talk to me a few weeks ago?"

Feeling like an idiot as he was too stunned. She asked him a question that he could've said yes immediately, but he was just frozen.

"You are, aren't you? And I think you fell down the last time too. Were you okay?"

He nodded his head quietly, and she looked relieved this time as she was the last. 

"Do you mind?" Coral said, going down to sit with her back against the bookshelf steadily before she had met with him from across.

Joshua thought to himself that he didn't know what was going on. She looked radiantly pretty, her kindness never ceasing, and it still surprised him. 

"I think you were also that guy seated near the window in math class."

He was holding his tongue. Joshua would never think she'd noticed any part of him.

"I never knew..." 

Joshua looked at her, giving just soft nods. It would be weird for him to talk to her back when he didn't know what kind of conversation he should make. 

Hearing her voice filled a nice sound like listening to a nice melody that would come playing into a store.

Should I run? Joshua asked himself in his thought. 

"Hey, you read that book?" He turned his head, finding the book she pointed out was the book that sat next to him. 

"Yeah..." he spoke up quietly. 

She leaned her head closer for a better view of the cover. "It's nice. I like their use of personification."

"What's your favorite...?" 

"The wind carried me home for the first time," she said, smiling. "I think there's a significant feeling behind it."

He remembered that quote as well. He'd love to talk about it, but didn't want to be overbearing. It wouldn't start off right. 

So he nodded. "I like it too."

Her lips curved up appeased. "What's your name?" Coral asked him.

Name. The thought of telling her his name was opening up to something new. Was that his silver lining?

Joshua saw as her brown eyes looked at him with a hopeful gleam. He was feeling really shy at the moment, but he caved. "Joshua."

"I'm Coral."

Though he knew her name, she introduced herself anyway. Her mannerism was featured— polite and poised.

He could feel his heart rate speeding up. With her right there, he wondered if this is what it felt like to talk to her.