AWAKENING

Timing Is Always Off

What happened to Avery is my fault. I should've handled those cop's a long time ago. Them as well as Jerry. I've known where he was for awhile now but I've been so consumed with Avery I let thing's slip. First I was focused on my revenge then I was focused on winning her love. Had I went ahead and settled the score with those hounds I could have prevented the trauma Avery endured .

She's been at the Hacinda for nearly a week now and she gets better day by day. I've told Sasha that I had to leave on business to keep her from questioning why Avery is here. Right now Avery and my son is my main concern. Duiring these pass few day's I've gotten to see the old Avery, the Avery I first met and fell in love with. This entire situation has humbled her and she's back to being my sweet little sunshine. Then again she surprises me.

Earlier this morning I confided in her about Jerry. I had told her that I captured him last night. We was sitting by the pool and she had on the tiniest red bikini with matching shades. "Is he here?" She asked without looking at me.

"No".

She nodded her head. "May I ask his whereabouts?"

It was no secret with Avery, she has always known that I did kill people but I've never discussed the details with her. "He is no more".

"Good". She snapped. Wait, what? She just blew my mind. I assumed she'd show remorse instead of being pleased. Deciding to push a bit just to see her reaction I said. "I buried him alive in the desert".

For the first time since this conversation she looked at me through her shades. "That was going a bit easy on him don't you think?'

Wow. Never had she turned me on so much as she did right now. Not because what she said, it was because most women would have freaked out and wouldn't accept my lifestyle. Yet here was Avery telling me I took it easy on Jerry. Sasha still has no clue what I actually do. She thinks I just own multiple casino's. She couldn't handle the truth. That's the thing with Avery, I don't need to hide who I am, only my feelings. Fuck why does she have to be so headstrong, stubborn or maybe she truly doesn't love me anymore and I refuse to accept it.

For some reason I decided to test my theories out. We laid right beside each other on the lounge chairs by the pool. I could see that Avery's eye's were closed underneath her shades as we relaxed under the warm sun. I outstretched my arm and lightly trailed my fingertip up the inside of her arm. Her lips quirked up in a smile and she said in a soft voice. "That tickles yet feels good".

And there was my door. I didn't remove my finger, instead I softly continued to strum my fingertip up and down the inside of her arm. After a few moment's she released a small moan of relaxation. I then moved my fingertips to her side. Avery giggled sweetly and shrank away. "Tickles". She mumbled.

I rolled onto my side facing her. After a few minutes she turned to her side to look at me. "Okay, what's up? You've been staring at me for several minutes now".

"I love you Avery".

Holy shit. Where did that come from. That's not what I intended to say but that's what came out. Avery propped herself up on her elbow. "Severo".

She said my name so sadly. Almost as if she felt sorry for me. I had to know though, I had to know if she had any feelings for me. "Avery do you love me at all. Is there any love left for me?"

"Severo".

There it was again, my name said in a sympathetic tone. "Tell me Avery. Be honest. I need to know if there's any chance at all for us".

She looked down at the stone patio and chewed her lower lip. Finally she spoke. "Yes Severo, I do love you but there's no chance for us. I'm too scared of you. I want so bad to be with you but then I think of all you did to me and wonder if it would happen again. I'm sorry, I can't risk that".

"Fuck Avery, haven't I proved myself to you.?" I asked becoming heated.

"Your doing great right now Severo, but what about in six months, a year? Will you hold your temper from me that long? Will you ever assume I've betrayed you again and put me through hell. I can't live like that, always wondering when your going to flip on me again. I'm sorry but I can't".

"How many time's do I need to apologize Avery. I fucked up okay. I made bad decisions. I was the worse SOB to you and I regret it with every breath I take. What can I do to make you believe me?" I yelled, my temper getting the best of me. Even though I was angry I wasn't going to harm her. I just needed to vent.

Avery stood up and wrapped her towel over her. Clearly she was upset by me yelling at her. "What? I can't even raise my voice around you now? You know couple's argue from time to time and it's perfectly normal".

"We aren't a couple". She lashed back.

"And who's fucking fault is that Avery?"

"Yours". She screamed balling up her fists.

"Ohhhhh, looks who's getting mad now? Fighting mad by the pool of thing's".

"Shut up Severo, just shut up will you".

"Why should I. You have no problem accepting my help, especially the other night might I remind you. You just won't accept my love correct?"

"I'm done discussing this Severo".

"Oooooohhhhhhh.... she's done. She's warned me. Well I'm not done damn it. Fucking talk to me Avery".

"Screw you Severo. I mean really? You have a girlfriend. Let me repeat that so you understand. G-I-R-L-F-R-I-E-N-D". She spelled out.

"I'm not a fucking idiot Avery but you are if you think for one minute I fucking love her. Fuck, your not giving me any pussy so I must get it from somewhere".

Her hand snapped out and cracked against my cheek. She gasped and covered her mouth. Taking a few frightful steps back from me she whispered through tears. "I'm so sorry Severo. I-I didn't mean for that to happen".

I rubbed my stinging cheek and spat. "You can stop backing up Avery, I'm not going to retaliate. I didn't last time and I won't this time. However who is the one with anger issue's now. You should really seek help for that".

"You are a unbelievable asshole Severo Marettia. You made me this way".

"That's okay Avery. You wear this asshole's name all over your ass".

"Not by choice". She snarled then held her hands up. "I'm not doing this anymore. I should head back to my place now. It's all safe, no reason for me to continue my stay".

That hit hard and I snorted. "Yes, you should go. Seems you've warn your welcome out".

Avery's mouth fell open but she didn't say a thing. Instead she scampered off. By noon she was gone and I was left to wallow in her aftermath and angry. Angry enough to make more stupid decisions. I placed a call to Sasha. As soon as she answered the word's flowed from my mouth like a river. "Marry me Sasha?"