I Am Rey

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"Two drowning people can't save each other.
All they can do is drag each other down."
-Carsten Jensen


Rey slammed her fist against the table.

"Look at me."

As his platter jingled against the strength of her palm, Luke Skywalker cemented his gaze where her fingers clenched the sleek table edge.

"Look at me!" The girl shrieked and caused a tidal wave of silence to ripple throughout the bustling Resistance lunchroom. "Luke... It's been weeks since I've seen your eyes. The maker's sake, Master, look at me!"

Skywalker did not so much as flinch. Rather, he fastened his grip on his tray of portions and stood himself up from the table. The eyes of the girl fractured as she followed his vanishing figure in labored breaths.

"Luke!" Her hand reached his shoulder and foiled his escape. He fought her hold on his arm, but she eventually drug his body to face her own.

Rey could feel the heat of her breath as she whispered in a plea, "Look at me... Master, just look at me-"

"You're making a scene," Luke mumbled before he pivoted back toward the entrance of the room. His fallen apprentice, however, stretched out her fingers and twisted her wrist, and his tray slipped from his hands to soar into the wall, leaving splotches of portions across the metal paneling.

"No," Rey stepped forward in a snarl, "That's making a scene-"

"I won't have this discussion with you here," Luke whispered between gritted teeth as his eyes flickered anxiously across their open surroundings. Several groups of Resistance members had gathered to marvel at the spectacle- of a failed padawan and her ruined mentor.

The little Jedi did not feel the weight of their gazes as her master did.

"Tell me why," her voice was raw, "Why do you hate me!"

"Do you expect me to feel proud of what you've done Rey?" Luke snapped, and the little Jedi stumbled backward at his sudden ferocity.

"No, no... I-I... I-"

"Answer me, Rey!" The Jedi Master marched forward as his face contorted into a warped frown, "Am I supposed to lie and say I'm not disappointed? Should I give you a hug and tell you everything's going to be alright? What do you want me to say?! You failed me! I'm ashamed of you! I'm ashamed of your weakness! I'm ashamed of what you've become!"

Rey noticed then, through glossy eyes, the great many people observing this scene. "I did... what I thought would keep me alive, Master."

"I would rather you have died," Luke straightened himself, "Than to have offered yourself to darkness."

A murmur echoed throughout the spectators as Rey's face crumbled in mortification and grief.

"Master... Master, you don't mean that..."

The weathered Skywalker scanned the young woman with feral eyes before he spun on his heels out of the room in silence.


"Disappointment."

Kylo Ren let the weight of his helmet drag his face downward.

"This is all you've ever brought to me."

The young man felt something twist and churn inside his thrumming heart as the fire of his anger fogged his mask.

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