Medley

43: ARMS.

"Since we're in a confessing mood, can I ask you a question?" Jasmine sits up looking puzzled, as if she can't think of anything she'd need to confess. "Are you in love with Kai?"

Her face turns pale and her lips tremble before she speaks, that's a sign she's considering denying it and in that, she's actually confirming it.

"Oh, my God! Is it that obvious?"

She's mortified and I don't understand why.

"No, it's not. But you can fool anyone except me, I noticed."

"Of course you did! I was going to tell you but..."

"...But you were too busy trying to shove him down my throat." I finish the sentence to save her from having to make something up to explain herself.

"He's crazy about you and you are my sister, if you had any chance at being happy with him I was not going to get in the middle of that."

It's not necessary for her to say it, I know this already, I'd do the same for her.

"Jazz, you've always known how I feel about him, why would you try to encourage me to date Kai if you were interested in him? That would've killed you!"

"Maybe. But his love for you brought him closer to me, you're the one thing we have in common. He'd come and talk to me about you and ask for my help, we're friends because of that. I wish someone loved me as much as he loves you, that's why I wanted that for you, Emi."

"Well, after our talk yesterday I think he has finally realized I will never feel the same way about him and I'm sure eventually he'll get over it."

"'Talk?' What did I miss? Did he finally say something to you, did he ask you out?"

"He knew it was already too late to ask me out, so he opted to skip the part where he confessed his feelings to me and went straight to demand answers about me and Harry. We both ended up saying things we didn't mean and later apologized. But I don't know, maybe now he'll give up the idea of me and that's when you should be around him the most, supporting him and showing him what an amazing woman you are. Be there for him, and when it's time, you can tell him how you feel."

"You say that as if I can make him love me. It doesn't work like that."

That is exactly what I said to him.

"You're entirely correct. But, right now he's blinded by something impossible. If you're there for him, it wouldn't hurt that when he finally opens his eyes you're the first one he sees. Love doesn't always just happen, Jazz. It can grow too."

"I have to go now or I'll be late, but you have no idea how relieved I am we had this conversation! I love you, Emi."

She gives me one of her trademark bear hugs.

"I love you so much Sissy, thank you for the pharmacy run. Have a safe trip."

I walk her to the door and plan to go to bed.

Talia checks on me after closing the store and offers to walk Seb before going home.

I've been drained of all my energy since Jasmine left and I had to vomit one more time despite not having anything in my stomach but water. The fever comes and goes, but when it comes I get sleepy and sweaty, and when it goes I feel tired and thirsty.

Once showered and in my purple and gray Baltimore Ravens pajama shorts and tank top, I get in bed with my cellphone close to my pillow in case Harry keeps his word and calls some time tonight.

I'm awakened by the sound of a machine gun going off on the TV. I open my eyes and try to adjust them to the light. Apparently, I fell asleep while I was texting back and forth with my brother.