<During Produce 101>
"Hyung," Guanlin said while we were waiting for our final performance.
"Yea?" I said.
"Can you kiss me when if I get into the final 11?"
I felt my entire body system shutting down by Guanlin's words. I just stared at him, unable to even let a sound out of my mouth.
Guanlin laughed at my reaction.
"I'm just asking because I don't think I'll be able to make it to the final 11. Obviously you will, but I'm not sure about myself. So can you just say yes? I probably won't get into the final 11 anyways," he said.
I nodded. I wanted to say something assuring to him, but I was still so shocked by his bold request.
He smiled.
"Oh and by kiss, I mean more like a peck on the cheek. You can kiss me if you want to, but that'll probably not going to work out that well since it's going to be on national TV," he said still smiling.
"O-Okay..," I stuttered. I could tell my cheeks were bright red.
Guanlin just laughed.
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"And the trainee that made it to the final 7th place is......... CUBE LAI GUANLIN!"
Bunch of screams came from the crowd. All of the trainees gathered in front of guanlin. He had a huge smile on his face. He came down the steps, getting hugged by the trainees. He finally came to where I was standing. Guanlin hugged me tightly and whispered into my ears.
"Remember our promise? Kiss me."
Just like that, he walked to the front stage where the final 11 sat at. I could feel my cheeks once again flushing.
The rest of the final 11 got called and the only places that were left was the first place, second place and the eleventh.
"And the trainees that are up for the first place is MAROO PARK JIHOON, MMO KANG DANIEL!"
Screams came from the audience, and me and Daniel hyung walked to the front stage.
"Good job Jihoon. You and I both came so far," Daniel hyung said.
"Thank you hyung," I smiled nervously.
Daniel smiled (I mean when is he not).
We stepped on the two white boxes and waited for the announcement.
"The trainee that is going to be the second national's center is.......... MMO KANG DANIEL!"
The audience cheered and howled for Daniel. So did I. To be honest, I was kind of disappointed, but I was still grateful for second place.
"Congrats Daniel hyung," I said.
"Thanks Jihoon. You did well," he replied.
We both walked up the stairs to our seats.
As I got closer to where Guanlin was sitting, I could feel my entire body tensing up. I was at Woojin's seat now, which was right next to Guanlin's. I quickly hugged Woojin and walked towards where Guanlin was standing. I hugged Guanlin and I walked away, or I tried to. Guanlin grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to him.
"Hyung, what happened to our promise? Kiss me," Guanlin said pointing his cheeks.
I hesitated for a moment but I ended up just giving him a quick short peck on the cheek. Guanlin smiled like he was satisfied. He looked like he had the whole world because I kissed him. Completely embarassed, I quickly walked away. I could feel my heart beating so fast that I became worried about other people hearing my heartbeat. This was one of the events that made me fall for Guanlin even more. I started liking even more than before.
This was also when I thought to myself that I should never let Guanlin discover that I had a sponsor.
I didn't want anyone in general finding out that I had a sponsor, because I knew they would think I'm a filthy whore, but I didn't want Guanlin to find out especially.
I was afraid that he was going to stop liking me if he found out that I had a sponsor.
So I tried my very best hiding my dirty little secret from him.
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<Back to the present when Lin found out that Hoon had a sponsor. Read chapter 3 for a better understanding!>
"Why," Guanlin asked me when I came back into the room.
I felt a cold shiver run down my spine. No. He did figure out. There was no way he'd know. The only place I actually interacted with my sponsor was on my phone, and there was no way Guanlin could see it. Because my phone was with me- wait where is my phone? I looked around the room to find my Iphone lying on the couch, which is where Guanlin was sitting. Oh shit.
Not wanting to believe what was happening, I asked him what he meant.
"You know what I mean. Why did you do it?" Guanlin said. He looked so angry and upset. I don't think I've seen him this angry or upset.
I could feel tears swelling up in my eyes.
"I had no choice. You don't understand. That was the only way," I said quietly.
"You shouldn't have done it. And you knew that," Guanlin shouted.
"I told you, I had no fucking choice! Okay Guanlin? Leave me alone. Please," I yelled back, tears rolling down my face.
Guanlin looked at me coldly one last time and walked out of the room.
I felt my legs go numb. Guanlin was the last person I wanted to figure about my sponsor. The whole world could find out about my secret and I'll be fine with that. As long as Guanlin didn't know, as long as he still liked me, I was fine.
But he figured it out.
Even before the world figured out.
It was obvious he thought I was a filthy whore.
It was obvious that he stopped liking me.
It was obvious that he just left me.
It was obvious that I just lost him.
I wanted to kill my self.
-uhhhh idk where this story is going-
