Jenna Marbles In The Hunger Games

Chapter Five: The Bloodbath,First week

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 .4...3...2...1. I sprint into the cornucopia, keeping my eye out for Hannibal Lector with sharks with laser beams strapped to their foreheads. I spot another Ninja Turtle Backpack and run for it, but the boy from District 9 trips me. He has an axe, but thankfully he falls over dead. I see the girl from District 2  throw a knife at me, but I put my backpack over my head so I don't die. Then I put my hand on my back to make a landshark fin and say " I AM A LANDSHARK,YOU CAN NEVER CATCH ME!" I sprint into the woods. I have been working hard on the elliptical at the gym, so I run about 10 miles into the forest before I stop and look through the turtle backpack to see what's in it.A spiderman blanket. Yes .A pack of beef strips. Who care about that diet? I’ll start tomorrow ,there’s a water bottle thats empty. Crap, I'm thirsty to. I don't find any water so I climb up a tree to sleep. Or try to sleep, because I see lights and hear noises. I look over, and am about to freak out. The girl from District 8 was throwing herself a rave.

The "Career" tributes must hate pointless raves to, because they show up within the minute to cut her. She must be the biggest idiot in the Games, now she's pleading "No, don't kill me, please!" Hahaa, nice try.

That night 11 other tributes have died, most in the bloodbath, unfortunately, my roommate is still alive. I make a mental note to find and kill him myself. 

At day I decided I needed to get something to drink, and set out to find water, that’s when I trip over John, into a pool of water. I chili face noodle punch his head off until he dies, then drink some water. I see a starship come to pick up John's dead body. Props to Nicki, now I know what a Starship is, and why they are meant to fly.I fall asleep. 

I wake up  choking on smoke , I see fire all around me. This wasn't like at the parade when Cinna lit a cigarette, this stuff was legit. I run away but fireballs are chasing after me! One hits my calf , and one burns off my sidebraid.

I hear the Careers chasing after me, and climb up a tree. 

"Kill her Cato" I hear Clove scream. Bit-- 

I see Cato climbing up a tree with a sword in his hand, but he's to heavy and the tree branches break. He must have stopped at Taco Bell.... 

"Just leave her there, she’s not going anywhere" Marvel says 

I try to think of a plan to get away from the Careers, when it hits me. A sponsor sends something to me and it hits me square in the forehead. I open it and its a..............chainsaw? 

I scan the woods looking for some possible answers of to why I know have a chainsaw when I see eyes staring back at me. Rue. 

She motions her finger up to my tree and I follow it, and see a Tracker Jackers nest. I wait until the anthem plays, seeing its my only chance. I start climbing up when it starts, I fire it up. I get 3/4's of the way through the branch and decide to finish it in the morning. I sleep thinking of Kermit and Marbles, and what hey would do if I never came home....  

I scramble up the tree next morning, and finish cutting the branch, and watch the mayhem unfold! Mwahahaha.  

The nest splits open on the ground, that’s what the Careers wake up to.  Most are running to the lake, but Glimmer isn’t so lucky, the tracker jackers’ ate her like Kermit eats bacon. Yeah, it was nasty. I jump out of the tree and see she has a bow and arrows, and I figure "why the heck not take it, free stuff!" I free it from her and run away again.  

Once I'm sure I have ran far enough, I sit down, now, with a weapon, I have a better chance in these games, I also have a chainsaw. I practice and, manage to actually kill a bird. I set a fire to cook it, and cut down a tree with my epic chainsaw. When the tree falls I see that someone is hiding behind it, it's Rue.  

"The careers aren’t the only ones that can have alliances" I say 

"You want to be my allie?" She asks, amazed. 

"Anyone should be able to be allies, I don’t care f your allies with a penguin or a box of fruit roll-ups, and to be honest, you remind me of Mr. Marbles" I say 

"Umm, okay?" She says. We sit down by the fire and I share my meal with her. 

" I got something from the Cornucopia, but Im to young" she says as she hands me a bottle of wine 

"Aww,  thank you!"  I say, and drink it all 

Somehow we ended up with making two perfect drunken cheesecakes which we eat.

"Do you know where to get anymore?" I ask

"There’s a full bar at the Careers camp, but its trapped with something, Ive been creeping on them..." 

"I understand everyone’s right to creep on the Careers camp, but how can we ge it, and maybe punch all the other stuff and break my hand again?"  

After talking most of the night, we have a plan. 

That morning, Rue goes to light the first fire, while I head back to the cornucopia. I crouch in the bushes when I see movement,. Foxface! 

She does an odd series of movements, some I’ve done at The Estate. She gets behind the giant pyramid and takes some apples,gum,6 cheeseburgers, a large fries, Coke, Mcchicken, and a Caesar salad to even it all out, then she takes off. I see the boy from District 3 tending to the bar. It clicks now, why the boy from District 3 is here, Foxfaces dance, the pile is jagger bombed. 

I try to figure out how I can get the drinks and...is that a freaking Sorry board? Yes! I take out my bow and arrow, shoot the boy from District 3, then do that dance, take the bottles, load my backpack, and grab the Sorry board. I dont want anyone to know what I took, so I shoot  a bag of apples, and they fall on the jagger bombs that exploded, affectively blowing up the whole camp.  

I run back to try and find Rue, but cant.