Aberrant

Chapter 5 - Hunger

I enter the school to find Ash sitting with the others without saying so much as a word, his gaze appears to be focused on the wall with a blank expression. This isn't like him at all, usually he is energised right from the word go, that's where we both clash: I like sleeping, he doesn't. This makes it hard for him because most of the time when he tries to talk to me in the early hours of the day, I'll either be half asleep or snapping at him for talking.

But now he's just quiet, I can see the wheels turning in his head as he thinks silently to himself. His blond hair is a mess on top of his head and greasy from running his hands through it over and over again, the dark tones under his eyes suggest that he's barely slept, and it's not that hard to tell he just picked up his outfit of the floor this morning. Despite how bad I feel for him, I still don't want to approach him, he shook me up yesterday and I can't help but feel like he'll get angry like that again.

I'm not even a couple of steps inside the dining hall before Ash notices me, he jumps straight up from his seat and puts his guilty gaze on mine. His whole posture is slumped, like he's trying to hide his guilt and how worn out he is. He stares at me for a moment before giving me a hesitant smile, he quickly shuffles out of the room and into the hall, thinking he wants me to follow, I do.

When I step into the hall he's leaning against the wall, trying to pull off being relaxed. I stand in front of him now, picking at a lose thread on my jeans, maybe this isn't such a good idea. He could easily snap at me, I don't want to hurt him, because that's what I'll do if he makes a grab for me. I notice that the jeans he's wearing are the same from yesterday, but the bottoms of the legs are now covered in mud and grass stains. It's makes me wonder what he was up to last night.

A sigh escapes his mouth, "I'm sorry." Only now do I realise how angry I am at him, he got jealous for no reason and hurt me, he didn't even care.

"Sorry, won't cut it," I say harshly, making him flinch, "You know that there's nothing going on between Colin and I, nor do I want there to be. If there's one thing I'm not, it's a cheater. I f I wanted to be with him, I would break up with you. Do you see me breaking up with you? Do you? No. That means that I don't like Colin, he's a friend, and if we're going to remain together, then I expect you to make an effort to be friendlier with him."

Without another word I start to walk off, before I get to the doors he grabs my arm lightly. "Wait," He says pledingly, "I really am sorry, I just - you're beautiful and so many guys look at you, I don't want them to look at you and... it feels like you'd leave anyone for me, because it feels like I'll never be good enough for you."

I sigh, leaning against the wall, "Look, Ash, I won't leave you. If I thought I could have someone better than you, I wouldn't be with you. I like you and you like me, okay? If this is going to work you have to get over your jealousy and trust me."

"Okay, I'm sorry. I won't act on my jealousy again, I'll just have to remember that I trust you." He smile slightly as he offers me his hand.

I take it gladly, "Should we go back in there?" I say, nodding to the dining room doors.

A smirk plays on his lips and I look at him suspiciously, "Well we could, but we could also do something else."

I bite my lip, giggling, "Well we could..." I look at the time on my phone, still enough time, "We have about ten minutes."

He grins at me, dragging me down the hall to find a secluded spot, where a teacher won't try to stop us.

In first period Psychology, Cree/Colin is waiting in his seat looking a little tense, he relaxes as soon as he sees me, "Where have you been? I was worried, I called Avex, but he said that he's been trailing you all morning and nothing happened."