Rescue My Heart

Chapter 23

REWRITTEN

CLOVER

Dear Diary

I started therapy. Shocking, isn't it? Jane forced me, I'll say that, but I wasn't entirely against it either.

She says maybe a little therapy will fix me. Therapy is the fixer, am I right? We are co-dependent on each other (her words, not mine, but no denying that). I found him while in need of solace and protection. I found him and then I lost myself. I forgot how to live in a world without him. We must coexist – my brain says.

Unhealthy, I know, but if you're torn apart and you find someone who's alike, then you learn to coexist. You love that person despite any faults, and when they vanish, you forget all the world before.

He's my first love, too. He started my journey on 'real' relationships, and I love him for that. He helped show what I need out of life, so how can I forget that so easily? He saved and fixed me. I can't let that go.

But life sucked before him, so life can suck after him.

He has to remember. He has to reunite us. I can't do that on my own. He says he can't remember. He highlighted that word so much. Why? But oh well, I have my therapy session after school today.

Three days of this hellhole before winter break.

If I don't see him, it'll be okay.

~Clover

Mason caught up with me by my locker. He put his palms over my eyes, laughing. "Guess who?"

"Oh, the stupid fool who once shoved a tamp –"

"Hush, hush!" He twisted me around. "No need to shout it off the rooftops. And I was twelve!"

"Actually –"

"Midge, shut up." Mason knocked my shoulder lightly. "Anyways, want to watch a movie tonight? I've got Saw III."

Mason bringing up scary movies returned my memories of Logan. At the beginning of our relationship, we'd have the horror movie nights, ducked under blankets with a bowl of popcorn. His arm around my shoulders, me scooting closer whenever there was a scary scene. Now the memories pained, a slow agonizing death that might get solved today.

"Yeah, a movie night sounds great, but please don't make out with Elisa during it? I don't want to feel like a third wheel."

A gleam overtook his face. "You're welcome to an orgy if you want."

Now I laughed.

Together, we walked to our next class, his arm around my shoulders yet my feet ground to a halt in front of the room. In the very back row sat the guy I'd planned to avoid. He half-lay in his seat with his feet propped on the desk, his phone glued to his hand.

Mason, of course, noticed this and said too loudly, "God, the orgy is going to rock your world."

Logan's eyes lifted, alarmed. I hoped Mason's arm around my shoulders would cause a burst of anger, but no, he stayed glued to his phone.

If it was some girl, I'd throw hands.

Elisa tugged Mason next to him, shaking her head.

Next to Logan was the only available seat, even if it would be awkward because of our complicated relationship. But no choice unless I traded seats with someone. So without a word, I plopped down next to him, settling on disregarding him for the rest of the lesson, except for the occasional glances at his phone, to see if he was texting a girl.