She moved with a certain thoughtfulness about her. Every step was placed gently. Whether this is to disappear from those around her or to protect the wounds they inflicted was unknown but, either were understandable for someone in her position. To h...
She stands with her arms crossed over her chest. Her eyes are wide and shifting. Pink tints her cheeks. It's fair to say that she's probably a little embarrassed and it's adorable. I smile at her gently "it's okay", I say "I'm not exactly complaining". She turns an even brighter shade of red and I chuckle at her. She's so innocent. "May I come in?", I ask. She nods and opens the door wider. I step into her home. She seems to be making sure to keep more distance between us than usual. I look around her house. It looks like she did some cleaning. I wish she'd stop doing that. I don't like her doing that sort of thing. I want to distance her from that past life I forced her into as much as possible. " I think we should get you a maid", I tell her. I turn to her to see her. "Why?", she asks "is it not clean enough?". I realize my mistake in saying that. It's too late to take it back and I can see her chest heaving in panic. She thinks she's in trouble. I rush to her, "You aren't in trouble and you did a great job I just don't want you hurting yourself". My words fall on deaf ears and she's now more frightened at my sudden movements. I lift my hand slowly to her cheek. Despite my slow pace, she flinches back so violently that she falls to the ground. I crouch down to her, "please just let me help me help you", she doesn't respond but instead pulps her legs to her chest successfully putting a barrier between us. I guess I'll just have to take a chance. I slowly crawl towards her. She scrambles back until her back hits the wall and looks around frantically. I wrap my arms around her and pull her into my chest. She struggles for a moment, but I keep holding her anyways. She calms down a bit and I start stroking her hair. I rest my chin on top of her head. After what feels like an eternity her harsh breaths fade to soft whimpers and she falls asleep. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I look down at her now calm face. What kind of cruel irony is this? I terrify her with every action and a calm her with my touch. It's times like this when I hate myself the most. All I have to offer this girl is something I can't control. She flinches afraid when I try to offer her even that. I press my lips against her forehead for a long while. Eventually, I pull back and see a ghost of a smile on her face. I take her into my arms and carry her to her room. I lay her on the bed and stare down at her. She's so peaceful like this. I can almost forget what I've done when she's like this. I watch the slow rise and fall of her chest. Her lips are parted slightly allowing air to pass. Her hair falls around her in almost a halo. I pull up a chair next to her and sit down. When she wakes, I want to be able to explain myself immediately, or at least that's what I tell myself. I know that my real reason is my own selfishness. I know that it also my selfishness that makes me hold her hand too. I don't deserve even this much yet I want so much more I want all of her. I want her laughter, her smile, her blush, her humming when she cooks. Everything about her is beautiful to me. I knew how beautiful she was all along. I thought I would never have her so didn't want anyone else to either. I guess I was right though. I will never have her. Those kids all those years ago were right but I was so stupid to listen. I sigh at all my failures. ... I didn't realize that I had fallen asleep until I work up. Thankfully she's still sleeping. I look out the window to see that the world had gone dark and the moon has risen. She's been asleep since afternoon and, from the looks of things, will be all night. I guess I should take her to the doctor for more than just her heat. I should have taken her to the doctor a while ago. I guess that's one more thing that I can add to my list of mistakes. I remember the last time I was at the doctor's office. I was having some back pains after I... I cringe at the memory of what I did. Dr. Azur couldn't find anything wrong with me. I remember that she said I might have of been feeling empathy. That would make sense, I guess. Once one mate knows who the other is the bond begins to grow. I was probably feeling some of her pain. She didn't know how right she was. Or maybe she did. I bolt upright in my chair at the thought. She and Hope were kind of close. What if Hope told her? My feet carry me to the door before I tell them to. Anger swells in my chest at the thought that she may have of known that I was beating my mate and continued to let me do so. I all out begin to sprint to her office. She stays in the apartment above her office to be available constantly. I slam open her door. She snaps awake at her desk. "Oh Alpha Will", she says sitting up groggily, "I wasn't expecting you". I growl loudly at her. Her face noticeably pales. "Did you know?", I ask in a low voice. "Did I know what?". "Did you know Hope was my mate?", my voice takes on an accusatory tone. I look of understanding and shame passes over her face. Her eyes drop to the floor. "Say it", I continue to growl, "say that you knowingly let me beat my own mate and did nothing to stop it!". "I didn't know for sure, but I had my suspicions", she tells me this with her voice low and full of shame. This woman let me hurt my own mate and for that, she will be punished.
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