⌈01-Fear and Anxiety⌋

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"What's comin' will come, and we'll
meet it when it does"|-Hagrid

"What's comin' will come, and we'll meet it when it does"|-Hagrid

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Harper smiled as her eyes opened, it only took her a second to remember the events of yesterday and looking around her room to realize that she was finally home, in Forks.

Although they had moved around a fair amount in her 17 years of life, for her, Forks was home. She couldn't logically explain why she felt more at home here compared to Alaska or anywhere else they had lived, but she had noticed since they had first gotten here that she felt safer, like she was meant to be here.

Sitting up in her bed, Harper's eyes wandered around the room she hasn't been in for so long, smiling when she saw the large stuff wolf Jasper had given her for her 14th birthday, the first one she had celebrated in Forks, a wolf had always been her favourite animal and he had told her that when he saw it he knew he had to get it for her, everyone laughed but her mom who had rolled her eyes.

Harper ran out of bed as fast as humanly possible and ran downstairs, hardly remembering to breathe as she stopped where the carpet started in the living room and let a larger smile fall on her face as all of her family were sat in the living room, even Bella.

"I told you to wake me" She said, throwing a fake glare at her father before hearing foot steps behind her in the kitchen. Turning around she saw both grandparents talking and smiling to each other, laughing about something the other said, making the girls heart warm and full of light. All she wanted one day was love like that.

"only if your dad lets you leave the house long enough" Edward snorted from the spot besides Bella, causing her to snap her body back around.

"I thought I told you to stay out of my thoughts- hey where's mom?" The daughter asked, frowning when she realized that the spot her mother usually took up beside her polar bear of a father was empty.

"She went out to get you food, there isn't much in the cupboards" Esme explained as she walked into the room, leaving her mates side to bring her granddaughter into a hug.

"I missed you so much" Harper whispered, as she wrapped her arms around the colder woman. Harper had taken comfort to their coldness. She never once felt unsafe with them, she never felt like she didn't belong with them. The Cullen's were her family, there wasn't away around it. Although deep down she knew that someone left her on a door step, like her parents had told her at the age of 12 when they explained everything to her, that didn't matter to her.

You always see on tv shows that when the "adopted person" finds out they are adopted they get angry and cry and set out to find their real parents- but that simply wasn't the case for Harper.

"When did mom leave?Will she be back  soon?" She asked after hugging her grandfather, moving towards her father. Harper had slight separation anxiety, not being with her parents scared her. She always worried about them and although any of them could literally walk away from being hit by a car, that never gave her peace of mind. She always felt unsafe without them. Harper had been homeschooled all her life, and besides the days where the Cullen's went to school she was always with them unless they went out to hunt.

From the time she would have started grade one, Esme began to teach her things. Simple maths like sorting, Reading(although she was always two grade levels ahead in it). Then around 9th grade they put her into online classes. Rosalie was always so incredibly proud of her daughter, Harper was smart and beautiful, funny and sarcastic, her and Em has done a good job or raising their daughter. Throughout all of Rose's doubts, throughout the constant worry that rose wasn't doing enough, came to be this wonderful human being and nothing would ever bring the blonde more joy than that.

"She left twenty minutes ago, she should be back within the next twenty, your mother is stronger and scarier than a truck, she'll be home safe and sound soon" Emmett told his teenage daughter, pulling her into a side hug and kissing her forehead.

Giving the polar bear a nod with a smile, Harper head moved towards the panoramic window, her lips thinning in a line as she took in the beautiful view of the forest. One that she had always wanted to explore.

Before the family of three went to travel, the only time she had left the house was when she was with someone from the family, and it was always to go somewhere, like book shopping in Port Angeles or grocery shopping(which looked like they were buying to feed an army of 12 when it was really just for one). She wanted to go out, and walk in the woods, explore things on her own, have a moment with her thoughts and feel the grass between her toes. She didn't want to go out long, not long enough to feel her anxiety set it, but just for a moment.

Harper was confusing, confusing to herself as well as Jasper and Edward- both checking in on the girl more than she liked them too. She was split 70/30. 70% of her didn't want to be alone and the other 30% of her did. All at the same time and it was horrible.

Harper was the kind of girl who's thoughts consumed her. She thought more than she talked.

A large part of Harper wanted to be independent and adventurous, to take risks and live life to the fullest but it always felt like something was pulling her back. Fear and Anxiety. But for once she didn't want to let that stop her, she wanted to go take a walk and not fear the unknown for twenty minutes out of a day, and that's what she was going to do. When Harper was determined, nothing could stop her, most times.

"Like hell you are!" Edward said harshly as he stood up, his gold eyes looking into hers as he moved, snapping the girl out of her thoughts after than ever.

"Excuse me?" Emmett asked from beside her, not liking the tone Edward took towards his daughter. It was no secret that the two weren't biggest fans of each other, growing up Edward had always treated her like a flight risk and now she was more than hurt about how hypocritical he had been. Almost as if she wasn't good enough to be a Cullen but Bella was.

"There's no way your going out there. Don't even think about it"

Just as Emmett opened his mouth, Harper stood up, a look of anger flashing on her face faster than ever before.

"And why the hell not?"

"Because it's dangerous!"

"Since when did you start caring? I don't know if this is how you treat Bella but that's not how you can treat me. You don't get to order me around and make my choices for me. It was a conversation I was going to bring up to mom on my own! And I don't know how many times I have to fucking say it but stay out of my thoughts!"

"Edward! Harper!" Esme called from her place beside her husband, shocked at the way Harper spoke, she was never one to blow up and get angry.

Harper scanned her eyes before looking back at her father, who's face was full of confusion, and then to Esme and Carlisle before pushing past Edward and walking back up to her room.

Maybe it wasn't just her fear and anxiety always holding her back, maybe it was theirs.

As she closed the door to her large room she felt tears of anger well up in her eyes. She hated yelling and she hated being angry, it always seemed to turn to sadness, sadness that just built up in side her- it was times like this were Harper needed Rosalie the most.

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