We Fall Again (Joji x Maxmoefoe)

Getting There, Hun~

Chapter 3

I opened my phone staring at his contact, "should I do it..." I thought to myself. My finger nervously hovered over the call button. I shook my head setting my phone down, leaning back in the chair and staring up at the ceiling, wanting to give up.

"I said I would make sure to keep my distance. I won't do this. I'm gonna go there and he is gonna think I am weird as fuck and we will never talk again! Good God. I say I love you behind closed doors and that's all I can do, cause I am too pathetic to go out there, look him in the face, and say... I-I love y-..." a few tears gather in my eyes but I sigh wiping them away, "No, you said you would call him and tell him that you are coming over. You aren't going to give up now. If he says no then deal. You are suffering with it as it is. It's better to tell him how you feel than coop it up in your chest."

I pick up the phone and press the call button, holding the phone at my ear listing to the ring... anxious..

"Hello?" Joji's voice rang out frosome other line. I immediately smiled even if it wasn't supported with any confidence.

"Hey Joji..! I wanted to talk to you but uh.. I feel like over the phone really isn't appropriate, y'know?" I stated while running my fingers through my thick and curly locks hoping I had said it clearly and didn't sound nearly as stupid as I thought I did.

"What do you mean...? Are you alight?" he sounded a bit more alert seemingly worried. The concern in his voice sounded slightly different than usual but I didn't question it.

"Yeah everything is okay. It's just very important and I wanted to make sure you were okay with me coming over." I spoke up trying to reassure him that I was okay but made sure he knew what I was saying, thinking just a little too hard about my every word.

"O-oh, yeah that's fine, Max," he stuttered, sounding... nervous?

"Are you sure? If you don't want me to it's alright, I completely understand," I told him hoping I wasn't forcing him into anything.

"No, I'm perfectly okay with it. I honestly enjoy company.. it gets lonely over here." he replied definitely sounding more sure this time. I guess it can get a little lonely over there.

"Cool, well bye then. See you in a couple days," I told him in my happy go lucky tone.

"Hmhm, can't wait..!" He chuckled sounding more excited than ever. I blushed lightly with a smile you couldn't exactly wipe off my face, "Bye." he hung up in haste oddly but I could almost hear him smile. He seemed so... up beat now. Yet as happy as it made me it couldn't shake the nerves that built up, now it had me sure I was gonna have a slight panic attack but I held it all back... somehow.

Yes, yes, I'm travailing over seas to go tell a friend that I like him knowing that he could say no and all that money would go to waste and then it would be a hassle to get back home having to stay in a motel, possibly, to wait to book another flight back home. I thought about how stupid it is but.. I'm doing it all for him and I couldn't give two flying fucks if it's a lot of money and stress just say one sentence to him. It seems ridiculous to many but to me.. I believe he is worth that. He is worth so much more than that, to be honest. Some say I am stupid, others say I am a more of a man than any other to do such for someone I love, and many say I am vulnerable... Too vulnerable, but what does it matter? They will never convince me when I know what I am going for, I know what I want and what I am going to do. I'm stubborn, very stubborn.

I stood up after I had my little self reassurance session and headed to my room searching for my suit case as I couldn't really find it. I swore I had set it in the left corner of my small little closet as it was the only place I knew to put it... Ahh.. there it is. I forgot I had set those close on top of the case only hiding it from sight even though a rectangular figure isn't that hard to miss. I picked it up throwing it down on the bed.

Something that is very unusual of me had just happened as I unzipped my suit case looking for a pair of clothes. I just grabbed a bunch of shit and shoved it in the suitcase. I'm not a neat freak it's just when you do that your clothes get all wrinkled and it kinda looks like.. shit. I wanna look alright at least but right now I had beads of sweat rolling down my forehead as if I was left out in the rain and got soaked. Not only that my palms were sweaty and my hands were fidgety. I took a deep breath pulling out my phone.

"Flight to Sydney, flight to Sydney, flight to Sydney," I constantly whispered to myself searching franticly trying to find a flight to Sydney, "Ah-ha!!" I spoke aloud!

After booking the trip and setting my alarm I practically fell back on my bed and sigh, "I'mmmm soo not ready yet I am.. I know that big chance of him saying no and that slim chance of him actually saying yes. As much as I want to hear him say yes.. I wanna hear the truth. What if I pressure him on accident? I don't wanna do that. I really don't need to do that. That would fuck us both up! J-just calm down. Just tell him you don't want him to feel pushed. Tell him that if the truth is the thing I don't want to hear, it's alright. Something is better than nothing... right..?" I think to myself. Staring up at the ceiling I smile. I smile a very.. joyous smile.

" He's so cute... so sweet.. so small. I've always had the urge to just hold him and cuddle him. I mean, he is so tiny, who could resist?!? He's just perfect, his personality, his looks, his height, his heart.. He's so friendly yet very shy so many people think he is this disgusting jerk that likes to fuck with people due to his channel. He isn't really like that, sure his sense of humor is crude and just screwed up in every way imaginable but it isn't all of him. He only acts like such around us, his friends, just not constantly," I sigh to myself and close my eyes for a moment.

"I just wanna see him..."