Chapter 5: My fault

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~Camila's POV~

~3 years later~

I sighed, looking at the picture frame in front of me. It was my fault, it was all my fault.

I sighed again, as a cold tear came rolling down my damped cheek, and dropped on the wet page of the photo album on my lap. It's been three years, three years of living in this hell I created for myself, three years of faking smiles and hiding tears, three years of blaming myself every seconds that passed by and crying myself to sleep but still standing strong for my little girl Quincy; seven years of not hearing their voices and their laughs, not seeing their faces and having their comforting smells around me, seven fucking years. It could have been different, so much different if I reach out to them those four years after I left, or if I didn't let my pride and my fear got the best of me and talked to them that night at the RDMA, or if I didn't push them away when they offered help back in our Fifth Harmony era, or just.... if I didn't chose that time and that day for them to come over to my house; none of these would happened, NONE of these at all.

I chugged down the rest of the bottle in my hand and threw it across the room, smashing the glass object into a million pieces. Well, I better clean that before Quincy gets home. Quincy, I chuckled to myself at the thought, she was looking forwards on meeting them so much when she was little; and now she would never have that chance, to get to know how amazing and beautiful they are in person. And it was my fault!

I couldn't remember any day in my life clearer than that one. The wait, the call, the cold hospital room, the sight of their lifeless body in the blue patient gowns, the last words they said to me, the paparazzi who wouldn't stop bombing me with questions outside the building, and the way I broke down in front of them, giving in to the unbearable pain in my heart. After that, everything is a blur, everything that happened in the past 3 years in just a blur. Because I was numb, and I was empty, I was lost inside my own mind.

Out of all of it, the most painful one was their last words that kept echoing in my mind: "We're sorry Mila for everything we did that hurt you. We're so sorry. And remember that we love you, with our hearts...."

They said sorry, though it wasn't even their fault. It was mine, all mine.

I rolled up my sleeve, revealing scars, nasty ones, from all my last attempt of ending my life and held a shiny metal razor shakily in my other hand. Here it goes:

One for Lauren,

One for Ally, 

One for Normani,

One for Dinah,

And one for Fifth Harmony.

As the last slice cut through my wrist, the red sustain that was covering my hand flooded out more than I've ever seen before, and I started to feel dizzy. My finger slipped pass the send button on my phone, just in time everything went blank, and I fell to the cold hard floor of my own house.

To: Taytay <3
Tell Quincy, I love her with all my heart, she's my little princess to the rest of time. Tell everyone I'm sorry. I'm so sorry Taylor. But I can't bare this pain anymore. I guess my reunion with Fifth Harmony is sooner than we thought.
12:19PM

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I used this chapter for April's Fool once but now its the real ending for the story since Im not gonna continue this❤ Lav you guys!
_Kat

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