Gems Of Ramadan ✔

DAY 28 - FASTING OF THE TONGUE (Part 3)

Some people like to give their Ramadhaans, their night of Laylat al-Qadar or their Hajj away. Listen to this story. A blood brother and a sister went to Hajj, and the brother left his wife behind. She wanted to stay behind because she has a lot of kids, so she stayed behind at home. During the Hajj, the brother and sister were walking in some place and the brother said let me just quickly buy this gift for my wife. The sister was in a rush and she said one simple word about his wife. They were not even on bad terms, they were on good terms but it was just some words she let out. In her country, the wife saw a dream - the one that did not go to Hajj. She saw a dream that her sister in law gave her Hajj to her as a present. She called the Shaykh up - Shaykh I had this very weird dream that my sister in law gave me her Hajj. He said she must have said something, backbit or gossiped about you, and her Hajj is a reward for you - that is what you are going to end up getting. When her sister in law returned, she told her the dream. They were on very good terms and the sister in law admitted it, apologised and asked her for forgiveness. They were on good terms, but one word and she was going to give the entire Hajj to her for that! Imagine sentences, articles, constant harassment and years of feuding. Imagine how much reward they are going to lose.

Wallahi, speaking about Muslims in a bad way is not an easy game. I am going to tell you it may be decade's worth of deeds to compensate for a few words you said about a Muslim. A few verbal words, but it may take a lifetime's worth of deeds to compensate for them. Someone might say come on now, you are exaggerating and you are basing on this on dreams. I say I do not base it on dreams, but take it from the perspective of the harm you inflict on Muslims and take it more so from this Hadith. When the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam was about to marry Safiyyah radhiallahu 'anha, Aishah radhiallahu 'anha said she is short. In another narration, she did not say she is short but she just gestured that she is short. A simple hand movement and one word to say she is short - that is all it was. What did the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam tell her? The Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam told her if you were to put that in an ocean, it would change the ocean. Do you ever reflect on these Ahaadith when you read them? In Sunan Abi Dawood:
لَقَدْ قُلْتِ كَلِمَةً لَوْ مُزِجَتْ بِمَاءِ الْبَحْرِ لَمَزَجَتْهُ
Aishah radhiallahu 'anha, put that gesture or that word in the Pacific Ocean and it will change the colour of the Pacific Ocean. What it means is that it may cost you the Pacific Ocean's worth of deeds to compensate for that one word.

After hearing this, will you not reconsider everything you say, contemplate it and think about it before you say it? And you my brother and my sister on the receiving end, rejoice to the mountains and oceans of deeds that you are going to get, which your mum, your dad and your child would not even give you. You get it from the person who gossiped about you and backbit you.
You see those who get together after Taraweeh and they bring one Muslim after another - slandering and backbiting them. They start with the Imaam and the guy to their right and the guy to their left. They sit and laugh and then they get into politics and they slander men whose souls are possibly now in green birds, or on their way to being in green birds. What happens to all their deeds? That Taraweeh and that Qiyaam - they gave it as a gift to people. Not that one night only, but possibly for years - they are going to give it as a gift to someone.

When they told Aishah there are people who speak ill about Abu Bakr and Umar after their death, she said Allah subhaanahu wa ta'aala cut their deeds - their deeds stopped when they died and this is one of the means by which Allah wanted to extend more deeds to them. Abdullah Ibn al-Mubaarak said if I were to slander or backbite someone, it would be no other than my mother and my father, because I do not know anyone more worthy of reward than my mother and father.

In slander, Gheebah and those matters, you are either spoken about, you are the speaker or you are listening. If you are spoken about, we said enjoy the reward and do not be sad anymore. From today when someone speaks about you, do not feel sad. Remember the free Hajj you are getting, remember the free Ramadhaan you are getting, and remember the oceans and mountains of deeds that are going to come at you. Remember those deeds that are going to swipe you off your feet to Firdaws and you did not even have to work for them. As for those who speak, we already mentioned the Ahaadith warning about that. Now there is one who is listening and that is what I want to get to. Those who are listening - you have to withdraw as soon as possible or advise that person to be quiet. If they be quiet, you can continue sitting with them. If he does not stop, then you leave. You the listener are part of it and you will be a partner to him because Allah said in similar matters:
وَقَدْ نَزَّلَ عَلَيْكُمْ فِي الْكِتَابِ أَنْ إِذَا سَمِعْتُمْ آيَاتِ اللَّـهِ يُكْفَرُ بِهَا وَيُسْتَهْزَأُ بِهَا فَلَا تَقْعُدُوا مَعَهُمْ حَتَّىٰ يَخُوضُوا فِي حَدِيثٍ غَيْرِهِ ۚ إِنَّكُمْ إِذًا مِّثْلُهُمْ ۗ إِنَّ اللَّـهَ جَامِعُ الْمُنَافِقِينَ وَالْكَافِرِينَ فِي جَهَنَّمَ جَمِيعًا ﴿النساء: ١٤٠﴾
And it has already been revealed to you in the Book (this Qur'an) that when you hear the Verses of Allah being denied and mocked at, then sit not with them, until they engage in a talk other than that; (but if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them. Surely, Allah will collect the hypocrites and disbelievers all together in Hell. (Surat an-Nisaa': 140)
إِنَّكُمْ إِذًا مِّثْلُهُمْ
(But if you stayed with them) certainly in that case you would be like them.
If you listen to them, you are a partner to them. Be above and beyond all that and defend the honour of your brother or your sister. Guard the honour of a Muslim and Allah will guard your face on The Judgment Day.
مَنْ رَدَّ عَنْ عِرْضِ أَخِيهِ رَدَّ اللَّهُ عَنْ وَجْهِهِ النَّارَ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ
In Sunan at-Tirmidhi. If you are sitting in a setting and they begin to gossip and backbite, if you defend the honour of your brother then Allah will defend your face from Jahannam.

Be like Abu Ayyub the killer of rumours. Allah revealed Qur'an about him and his wife, for the stance they took to kill a rumour that inflicted the Ummah. Aishah radhiallahu 'anha - our mother and the definition of honour gets accused in her honour. Muhammad Ibn Ishaaq said that when people began to speak on the honour of Aishah, word got to Abu Ayyub (his name is Khaalid Ibn Zayd al-Ansaari radhiallahu 'anhu). Look at the discussion they had. He told his wife Umm Ayyub, if you were alone with that man in the desert like Aishah was, would you do anything? She said no way. He said Aishah is better than you, she would not have done anything. End of discussion and they killed the rumour. She did not say but Aishah is younger and Aishah is better looking, or I do not believe it but it is a possibility. No, it is done - Aishah would have never done it. Allah revealed Qur'an in the honour of Abu Ayyub and his wife.
لَّوْلَا إِذْ سَمِعْتُمُوهُ ظَنَّ الْمُؤْمِنُونَ وَالْمُؤْمِنَاتُ بِأَنفُسِهِمْ خَيْرًا وَقَالُوا هَـٰذَا إِفْكٌ مُّبِينٌ ﴿النور: ١٢﴾
Why then, did not the believers, men and women, when you heard it (the slander) think good of their own people and say: "This (charge) is an obvious lie?" (Surat an-Noor: 12)
Whenever you hear rumours or slander about your Muslim brother or sister with nothing to back them up, tell them you are a liar. This is an obvious lie so be quiet. You can do it in a good way and stop the rumour. Kill it and do not pass it on. This verse says two things - number one is think good internally, and number two is take it a step further and say this is a sheer lie. Just because something was said, it does not give you the right to pass it on. Be the one who kills the rumour. If you are a listener, stop those who backbite, slander and harm Muslims. Do you ever see anyone gossip and slander to himself? If me, you and all the other brothers and sisters do not listen, he is not going to sit in his room and gossip and backbite.

The one who brings you the news of what was said about others, what is going on with others and Nameemah (نميمة) - he is a Nammaam (نمام) and a Qattaat (قتات). Do not think those who do that Nameemah confide in you. You might enjoy it when he is talking about others, but it is only a matter of time before he turns and starts talking about you to others. The one who spoke about you originally was shooting blanks and he missed you, since you did not hear about it and it did not hit your heart. You will get the reward, but it did not hurt you in this life because you did not know about it. The one who brought you what was said about you is like someone taking the gun of that person and helping him aim so it will pierce your heart. Both are worse than each other. Yahya Ibn Katheer said those who spread rumours and the words of others, and gossip and slander - what they do in moments is more evil than what black magicians do in years.

Imaam Ahmad went to visit a man who was sick. He asked the man who was sick - did the doctor come check up on you? The man said yes. He has been sick for a while, so Imaam Ahmad said well who checked up on you? The ill person named the doctor and Imaam Ahmad said try this other doctor. On the spot, Imaam Ahmad said Astaghfirullah Al-'Adheem, I just did Gheebah. Just because he preferred one doctor over another, because of the high standards he holds his tongue accountable to, he deemed it that he was talking about the other doctor.
Whenever you want to speak ill of a Muslim, remember your own mistakes. People are flooded up to their heads in mistakes, but they want to talk about others. Put yourself in the shoes of that other person and think about how he is going to feel when you talk ill about him or her.

Finally, some say I want to repent and I do not want that person to take my deeds. Number one - you apologise to them. If you know they are open hearted, they will accept it and it will not cause more harm, go to them and apologise to them. If you think it will make matters worse, do not do it because the whole purpose of this whole matter is to eliminate hardships and problems among Muslims. If you know it is going to create more hardship, make Du'aa for him, speak good of him in some settings and give charity in his name. That is the best thing to do. If you were in a setting where you mentioned him in bad, go in a similar setting and try to mention him in good or make Du'aa for him. That is number one and that way you have given him his right back. Now you deal with the right to Allah, which is three prongs. You say Astaghfirullah, you plan on never doing that again, and then you regret your past. Inshaa Allah, Allah will forgive you, and you train yourself so that you will not do it again.

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Jazak Allah khair