cocooned in the cozy comfort of his blanket, taehyung pointed his flashlight at the manga open before him. he was slowly learning to read, and managed to find the discarded copy in the hallway, probably left behind by a careless child. he managed to read only a few characters per page and understood almost none of it, but the feeling of having something, even as unimportant as an abandoned manga, was enough to make him content.
lying on his stomach, he flipped through the glossy, worn pages with his tiny fingers, a small smile on his face as he took in all the different pictures. scenes of brave warriors, beautiful depictions of fictional worlds he couldn't wrap his young mind around, comical facial expressions that made him giggle: he loved reading it over and over again, every night. he suddenly heard the sound of footsteps approaching, and immediately turned off his flashlight and closed his manga, hiding them under his blanket. he pretended to be fast asleep just as the mystery figure opened the door to the sleeping chamber. all of the other children were sound asleep, and did not stir as miss cheol sat down on tae's bed.
"taetae, are you awake?" she whispered. "i need to tell you something."
pretending to be drowsy, tae slowly opened his eyes. "yes, miss cheol?"
"were you reading your manga?" she asked, her lips pursed.
"....um, no," tae lied terribly. "i was sleeping, like the other kids."
miss cheol sighed and slowly lifted his blanket, revealing the cause of his guilt. "i can see your blatant lies clear as day even in the darkness, honey."
"sorry miss cheol, i couldn't fall asleep and i got bored and i wanted to do something," tae rambled.
miss cheol couldn't help but smile. the boy was too adorable to reprimand. "try to stop thinking too much and do the breathing exercises i showed you," she told him, "then you'll slowly get sleepy."
"i've tried but the breathing makes me bored," he huffed.
"fine, but i have important news for you."
"what is it?"
"i may have found a home for you," miss cheol answered.
tae let out a small gasp. "...really?" he whispered back.
"yes, i wanted to wait to tell you about it, but they have actually been interested in adopting you for a long time. they wanted to make sure they've adjusted their living situation to best suit you as an addition to their family. now they're finally ready to meet you properly."
"wow," tae said slowly, "are they good? do you think i'll like them?"
"yes, but," miss cheol began, gently taking tae's hand in hers, "like always, you can say no. don't feel pressured into leaving and ignore what other people say. if you don't want to go, it's fine. i'll always be here to care for you, so i want you to be sure, alright taetae?"
tae nodded. "yes, miss cheol."
in the past, many parents have tried adopting tae, but it always ended with him crying and begging not to be taken away. "just let him go", "he shouldn't be so ungrateful", and "he's lucky to even be noticed" were only a few of the comments circling between the staff. it left miss cheol devastated; the audacity of these people to say such heartless words about a little boy who was simply not ready for a different world, she thought. it became a label known throughout the foster home: taehyung, the little boy that never wanted to stop being an orphan.
"now go to bed, little one, you'll be meeting them tomorrow morning."
miss cheol left, and tae drifted into a dreamy slumber, filled with visions of parents and a house he could call his own.
——
mr and mrs bang along with their own son sat across from tae with bright smiles. at first glance, they seemed like ordinary people to tae, and he felt disappointment settling in. they didn't seem like the ones that he could go home with. but as they spoke and played with him, tae began to realize that they were completely different than the rest. they felt right. shockingly perfect. he could almost touch the love they exuded, as it was so wholly tangible, and it felt like something he had never experienced before. a foreign feeling that he wanted more of.
mr bang read tae's manga with him, and tae found himself grinning. he read the lines in animated voices, which greatly amused tae, and patiently helped him with all the vocabulary he couldn't understand. he had so much fun, and cherished his manga even more than before.
mrs bang brought snacks, and as tae gratefully ate them, they talked about his likes and dislikes and everything in between. the entire time, tae noticed the kindness etched into her features, and felt comfortable with her. tae felt the warmth that emanated from her, and he felt strangely at peace, finding it easy to open up.
the bangs' son, yongguk, was twelve years old, older than tae by five years. he even brought his own books and toys, and allowed tae to look at and play with them. tae was extremely shy at first, because he thought that yongguk would judge him and see what a shy loser he was around other kids. yet yongguk didn't seem to notice how fidgety and awkward tae was acting and continued to share things about his life with him. the boys got along quite well, and by the end of the session, tae was completely taken aback by how much he grew to like the family.
with them, he felt accepted and not like an outsider, almost as if they were a real family. the visions of his dream life crept closer. his greatest wishes were being granted, right before his eyes.
——
taehyung and namjoon cried in a tight embrace for what seemed like forever. all of a sudden, a seemingly joyous day turned into one filled with melancholic farewell. it marked the last day they would be together.
"i'm so glad you're getting adopted, taehyungie," joon said, his eyes still glossy with tears. he wiped tae's flowing tears with his sleeve gently. "you're finally getting what you deserve."
"i'm gonna miss you so much, i don't wanna leave," tae started to cry again, and joon looped his arm around the smaller boy. tae was namjoon's whole world. his heart physically hurt at the thought of not having tae by his side at the foster home, but he didn't dare let his true feelings show. tae always did what made namjoon happy, and if he knew that namjoon was already suffering, he would never leave. keeping tae from his lifelong dream would only make namjoon guilty and selfish, and that was definitely not what he wanted weighing on his conscience.
joon pulled tae into another hug, not wanting to look at the boy's tearful chocolate brown eyes anymore. "you have to, you need to go," he told tae, closing his eyes tight, hiding his tears behind tae's back. he struggled to keep his voice steady. "this is the life you are meant to have. you can't give it all up just because you'll miss me. you'll have my number and we can see each other once in a while. it will be just fine, trust me."
——
the last thing tae remembered as he left the foster home in the backseat of the bangs' car was namjoon's smile, his cute little dimples on full display. tae could see him standing at the entrance of the foster home, waving goodbye until he began to disappear, at first becoming a small figure, and then nothing at all.
it will be just fine, trust me, were the words that echoed continuously in tae's mind as he clutched namjoon's number, written on a small piece of wrinkled notebook paper, tightly to his heart.
trust me. wiping away his tears, tae did his best to do just that.
