𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕜𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕤 𝕋𝕙𝕒𝕥 ℂ𝕠𝕟𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕖𝕤 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕃𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥 ➀

38 CORRESPONDENCE

I step out of the shower and dry my hair then the rest of my body with the plush, soft towel before wrapping it around my waist. I brush my teeth before wiping the mirror in front of me, ridding it of the steam induced fog that covered it. Looking down at the new ink on my forearm, something I had gotten in memory of Trevor, makes me think back to the experience.

The entire time I had gotten the thing Monica looked like she was going to pass out. She had sat there wincing every time the needle pressed against my skin and especially when he'd wipe the ink and blood away every now and again. It had made me laugh because she thought she'd wanted to get a tattoo but after watching me she said there was no way. I chuckle to myself thinking about it.

"Yeah, he's here, who are you?" I furrow my eyebrows at Monica's guarded tone from the other side of the door. I rip it open, not caring that I'm just in my towel. I just want to know who the fuck is asking to see me and why Monica sounds so hesitant.

Once I step out of the bathroom his eyes look directly at me. It's Trevor's lawyer, Mark. "Give me a minute, Mark." Monica looks over her shoulder at me. "Let me get dressed." He nods and Monica shuts the door.

"Who's the suit?" She asks as she crosses her arms.

"He's Trevor's lawyer. Well, he was." I begin to change into a pair of black jeans, a white and red baseball tee, and a pair of Chucks. I look over to Monica who is staring at me hungrily. I quirk an eyebrow up at her, "see something you want?"

"I love it when you wear baseball tees." She saunters over to me and grabs me through my pants. "Gimme."

"Jesus, if I would've known that I would've worn them more often." I wink down at her, my beautiful lustful girl. "Listen, I have to see what Mark wants and then I promise my cock is all yours." She pouts up at me and I can't help but chuckle down at her. "You've been with me for too long. You want to get laid all the time now." Not that I'm complaining.

"I'm just used to having you buried inside me." I burst out laughing. "What?" she shrugs "It's just the fucking truth."

"Mhmm," I peck a kiss on her lips "you keep talking like that and I'm going to think you're turning into me, sweetheart." After I place another quick peck on her lips I walk over to the door and let out a hearty breath of air before opening it up.

"Sean," Mark greets me with an outstretched hand and I shake it "how have you been holding up?"

"So, so." I look over my shoulder at Monica, "well, she's been keeping me together." She gives me a smile. "Want to come in?" It was kind of awkward having him standing in the hallway.

"No no, I'm just here to give you this." He hands me a manila envelope. "Trevor wanted me to give that to you in case, well, you know." I nod my head understanding his meaning. "Well, after you read everything I'm sure you're going to have a lot of questions." He hands me a business card. "Call me afterwards and we can set up an appointment to go over everything."

"Jesus, what the hell is in here?"

"Just read the contents and call me when you're ready to go over it all." He nods his head at me before walking away, leaving me dumbfounded in the doorway.

I close the door and stare at the envelope in my hands that has my name scrawled across the top in Trevor's hand writing. I walk over to the kitchen table and sit down. "Sean, what's that?"

"I don't know." My hands are trembling as I begin to open it. The first thing I pull out is a letter written in Trevor's handwriting. Since when was Trevor ever one to write letters?  I brace myself and begin to read.

'"Sean,

So, if you're reading this, I've kicked the bucket. I'm fucking dead as a doornail. Whatever, that's beside the point now. There are some things in life that I should have told you but didn't. You were the best friend anyone could fucking ask for and I was lucky to have someone as fucked up as me around. Actually, you're more fucked up then me but you already know that. Sorry, you know how weird I am with feelings and shit.

Well, here it is, the biggest secret I've ever kept from you. It's the only thing I've ever kept from you. You and I are really brothers. David is my father, I found out when I was sixteen. I found a paternity test with your father's name on it, stating that he was my father. It's in the envelope...."'

I set the letter down as I choke on the tears that are cascading down my face. I have to take a minute to fucking get my head right before taking out the test with shaking hands. There it is, his mother's name, his name, and my fucking father's name. Trevor was my half-brother. I sob again not being able to contain myself now.

"Sean, what's going on?" I don't say anything I just hand her the test. After a few moments she wraps her arms around me and I hug her back. "I'm so sorry, babe." I cry into her stomach as she strokes her hand in my hair.

"Fuck..." I let her go after a few minutes once I can get control of my tears. "Jesus fucking Christ! He knew all this time! He knew and never told me! Why didn't he fucking tell me!?" I grab the letter and continue reading.

'"Please, don't be too mad at me. I was going to tell you but that was the year when all that bad shit happened to you. Your mother was hospitalized and then...  I know we never talked about it, but I had an idea of what happened to you after that. That was the year I watched you die inside. I couldn't do it. I couldn't break you even more. I know you hate the words but I'm sorry, Sean.

Now that you know that, that you and I are brothers, the rest is easy for me to write. Everything that was mine is now yours. All that I own, all of my shit, all of my money, it's yours. Mark will go over everything with you, he knows about it all, oh and he's your lawyer now because I know how much fucking trouble you get into. Don't worry, he's already been paid.

I guess that's it now. Thanks for being there for me, for always having my back. Guess I'll see you in hell when you get here. How do you end this type of thing? You'd probably say 'end it with a fuck off or a fuck you.' But, hey, I love you, man. Don't forget it.

Trev'

I drop the letter and then drop my head in my hands. My mind is reeling right now. I feel like I'm going to be sick. The demons are crawling under my skin trying to temp me sinisterly. I want to get fucked up so bad. I can't control my emotions, they're too strong, screaming bloody murder in my skull. Telling me there is only one way to numb the pain.

I need to numb the pain. Yes, numb it and make it all go away.

"Sean," Monica puts her hand on my shoulder "babe, look at me." I scrunch my eyes even harder wanting to just shut the whole fucking world out. "Come on, breathe for me." I hadn't realized I wasn't fucking breathing because I am fucking hyperventilating. I take a deep breath and open my eyes to see Monica kneeling in front of me. "Come back to me, babe." I stare at her large, pleading brown eyes. She reaches out her hands and I hold them in my lap.

"I'm here." I say down to her making her give me a sad smile. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here." I know she knows what I mean because I would have usually just left, just buried the pain away. I promised her I wouldn't do that anymore. I wouldn't do that to her anymore.

"Good." She stands up and pulls me to stand. "I love you, Sean."

"I wrap my arms around her, taking a few deep breaths as I calm myself. "I love you too."

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A/N:

Well, the end is near and I'm actually quite sad about that. This is the first book I've ever published here. It's my 'wattpad baby', hahaha. Hopefully you've all enjoyed this strange little piece of fucked up fiction.