Chapter 11

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The weeks kept passing by as before. I spent time with Luna and Neville a lot and I also became really good friends with Georgia and Celine. Draco kept being a prick and I was done with the whole situation, I didn't have any time for his shit. He was a bad person, I knew that now. We were quits and he had started to be mean again, he might have had "complimented" me but then he had turned into a fucking dickhead again. At first, I hadn't known what to think but now I was sure: I was through with it, I was done.

I saw him in the Slytherin crowd at the Quidditch game the whole time and I was happy they lost. That would at least make him feel a little bad, especially because it was against Gryffindor. It started raining and the others ran inside quickly but I walked slowly, I enjoyed the rain for a little. It was kind of a thing for me, I didn't know why but I loved rain.

"Enjoying the shitty weather?" I heard a voice next to me. It was Draco. "Oh, just fuck off" I said and stopped walking. I wouldn't go in quickly and let him ruin the weather for me. We were standing in the middle of the quidditch field right now. I sighed. I wanted to walk away but he'd follow me anyway, no matter if I went inside or stayed outside. I didn't want to go in already though so if I was going to have to deal with him, I'd do it while I was enjoying the rain at least. "Yes, I do enjoy the shitty weather" I said bluntly and hoped that he would just go away once I answered him. But of course, he didn't. "That's weird, normally everyone hates rain." "Wanna make a joke about how I'm not normal? Go ahead, I don't give a fuck." That was a lie. A big lie. I would give a fuck. I would actually start to cry but I wanted to seem strong and not as weak as I had been back when I had met him in the owlery that night.

"I don't want to make fun of you" he said quietly. "Then go away! Or make a joke and then go away, just leave me alone!" I said. I started crying, I didn't know why. Why was I like that? Why was I not able to control my emotions? "Make a sarcastic joke about my hair again! Please and then go! I just want to be alone and enjoy the rain, okay?" I cried. I was happy about the rain because he didn't see that tears were running down my face. It was heavy rain, big raindrops. "What kind of sarcastic joke?" he asked, seeming genuinely confused. "Back in Hogsmeade, when you told me it looked nice." He blinked. "I wasn't joking or being sarcastic." I laughed. "Oh, please! As if you meant it." "I did. I mean, I hate to admit but I do think it looks good, suits you ... I guess." I was frozen, what the fuck? "And I think I need to tell you that I deserved that punch in the face, I'm sorry." What the fuck was wrong with him? I couldn't handle it anymore, it scared me so I decided to walk away and into the castle and then maybe go back out later once he would finally leave me alone. I realised I wasn't through with it though. "Where are you going?" he asked as I ran up the stairs, without a clue about where I was going. "Away from you" I just said. People were walking past us so he pulled me back downstairs and I couldn't push him away from me.

He dragged me down all the stairs behind him, until we reached the dungeons. "Fuck off and let me go!, I shouted but no one was down here. "I need to tell you something, okay?" he said. "What the fuck? Tell me in front of everyone so you can really embarrass me!" I called, feeling more and more crazy. "Listen" he said and I couldn't do anything else because he had me pinned against the wall again like he had done back in Hogsmeade. I couldn't do anything, I was helpless once again. And moreover, it wasn't possible to struggle when you were looking into his eyes anyway. His intense look hypnotized me every time, if I wanted it or not. I managed to not go completely insane. "I ... let me go. Right now!" I shouted but he was obviously the only one who heard me.

"Listen to me, please. It's not easy." "You have to hold me here to tell me something? That's not lame at all, Draco." "I'm afraid you'll punch me in the face again" he said with a smile. That smile was real too. And it was beautiful because he never smiled. This was the second time he had smiled. I felt like it brightened up everything, I couldn't even be mad at him now. I wanted to be scared, I should've been scared but I couldn't help but smile back. "Sorry I punched you" I heard myself say. "It's alright. I only got a nosebleed" he replied. And again, his face turned serious again, dammit. I wanted to see him smile again but I doubted that I could genuinely make him laugh. His eyes were about my height again now, he leant down. I couldn't look away or close my eyes. I couldn't even blink, I didn't want to miss a second of him looking into my eyes. What the fuck was wrong with me? Finally, I managed to look down. I closed my eyes and sighed.

Suddenly, I felt his lips on mine. Oh my god. My first impulse was to push him away and punch him in the face and kick him in the crotch. But then my mind disappeared and I returned his kiss. As he realised that I was not protesting, he let go of my wrists and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer, pushing me to the wall behind me. I put my hand into his hair to pull him closer. I felt his heart beating faster as his chest was on mine. What had started with a soft kiss now heated up.

After a while, he looked into my eyes and let go of me. "I thought you wanted to tell me something" I said. "I think that said it all" he said and his face was cold again as he just walked up the stairs and let me stand there.

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