Metanoia

"We Were In Love"

Arthur

"This way," Merlin's voice commanded, pushing several leaves and sticks aside to move forward. I pursuited my journey with him, following his every footstep when the floral he had just pushed aside swat my face in a harsh tone. Grunting with slight pain, I pulled the leaves and sticks from my face, edging towards Merlin, straining my eyes for a better view this time. I shouldn't be as oblivious as I am.
Sighing, I let my body switch to autopilot, my senses guiding my way through the forest.
I could hear the calm water from Lake Avalon sift and ripple with foreign waves; small, but powerful.
I could smell the soil, the essence from the droplets of rain connecting with the dirt of the earth warming me on the inside. Petrichor was a rare occurrence to these areas, but it was beautiful to sense when witnessed with.
My eyes traveled back up to Merlin. His dark locks were bobbing as he threaded through the grove, weaving in and out of floral, once in a while sneaking a glance back at me with fierce blue eyes, making sure I didn't leave him.
"You said you didn't know me," I suddenly spoke up, my voice frayed from sadness. I tried to block that, though—just focus on my feet and walk out the forest emotionally unharmed.
"Yes," Merlin casually replied. It was as if he didn't remember me.
What happened?
Closing my eyes for a short second, I kept trodding behind Merlin, replaying my mind through the series of events that led to this.
I did this.
Merlin was like this now because of me.
"My name is Arthur Pendragon," I solemnly introduced, eyes still closed, hearing the squeaks of damp grass underneath my shoes. My body then suddenly came in contact with a warmth—Merlin. Quickly peeling my eyes opened, I gazed at him in curiosity. "Merlin?"
His pupils were dilated, lips parted, an expression of shock overcoming his face. A quick look to my eyes was all it took.
I didn't realize I missed him this much.
"Arthur Pendragon," he mumbled in repeat, tone breathless.
I scrunched my eyebrows together. "Yes, that's my name." I watched as he stared away for a second, looking to the grass floor for confidence before he returned his gaze with mine. Something there this time was different, though. They were replenishing.
It gave me hope.
Sky blue clouded my vision for a second, before it escaped my sight, dancing away.
"Is something wrong?" I asked with slight concern.
Merlin silently shook his head in reply, not daring to speak a word.
My eyes squinted. I knew he was lying; and I was determined to find out.

Merlin

Arthur Pendragon. I was told about him. Whenever I would mention the Prince's name, a wistful expression would cover Gaius's and the knights' faces, trying to avoid the topic. My mind fumbled for the answer. What were they hiding?
"You came from Aeyland by foot?" Arthur suddenly questioned, his voice breathless—like he didn't believe my actions. What was more troubling is how he knew I had come from there.
"Yes. Is that a problem?"
There was silence. Did I mess something up? I let my eyes glance back, watching as he walked with a distant heaviness that most wouldn't detect.
"What's got you down?" I questioned. "You seem depressed."
I could hear Arthur swallow. He sighed. "I'm not quite sure I want to speak of it right now."
My eyes squinted, brows scrunching. "Why not?"
A reply didn't come. I clenched my teeth, giving a small roll of the eyes. Why was he trying to avert me?
"It's turning dark," Arthur suddenly commented after several minutes of silent walking, gazing to the sky to see the multiple hues casting an orphic light.
"Alright. We'll settle for the night here," came my reply. My eyes traveled to meet the ground, then flew back up into the depths of the scattered trees. "You stay here. I'm going to go collect some firewood."
I saw his face—eyebrows furrowed, hands fumbling with tension.
"Alright," Arthur replied, making myself break eye contact from him, stalking into the grove, searching for arid wood.

________________

Soon returning to our small, makeshift camp, I saw Arthur twirling a stick in the dirt. His posture seemed concerned—solemn.
Awkwardly walking over with a handful of wood, I layered them down in a patterned pile, setting it alight with a simple spell. Arthur's ears twitched upon hearing me speak. His eyes shifted to the glowing light, watching the flames flicker. I took a seat next to him, my gaze sometimes shifting over to Arthur playing with the twig, drawing encryptions in the dirt. There was complete silence. I wasn't sure if it was going to shift to a conversation or not. Then, as if he read my mind, Arthur spoke.
"I knew you in a different...timeline," he suddenly started, prodding the stick he held into the flames, watching absentmindedly as it burned. "You were by my side. We stuck together." He paused. "I would never let you leave my sight." His hands guiding the stick out of the fire, the ends of it now a dark black.
I stared at his eyes watching the burnt wood, the reflection of the fire changing the hue of his them. I felt my face flush upon the staring, as I then gazed down to the flames, watching them lick and greet the air.
"We were in love," Arthur suddenly croaked.
Were.
"Did something happen?" I asked quietly, trying not to burst any bubbles.
"Yeah." Arthur gave a humorless snort, soon letting his eyes meet mine. "I died."
My head whipped to see his face. "What?"
He sighed. "We tried to restore the former king to Aeyland." His freed hand gestured to me. "Your father. But, he died before we could finish our journey there."
"How so?" I questioned, leaning closer in curiosity. My mind had always turned with possible solutions as to why the man had died. I needed to know. He was my father.
"He died from hitmen sent by Morgana," Arthur mumbled.
My eyes strained in confusion. "Morgana?"
Arthur's eyes gazed at mine, a nostalgic look in a sheen coat layering his senses. "You really don't remember anything, do you?"
I shook my head in reply. I had not a clue what he was talking about.
A heaved exhale released from Arthur's mouth, his shoulders drooping in defeat. "I..." he lazily wiped an eye of moisture. "I thought after I came back we would finally have peace—happiness." His hands dropped the stick, as Arthur then covered his head with his hands. "I guess happiness isn't a path that you can choose. Felicity just doesn't work with us, does it?"

A/N: Hey everybody! Thoughts? If you have liked this book so far, please drop a vote or comment! It means a lot to me! Thanks! Bye!