Metanoia

"I Was The Taker"

Arthur

I balled up the ripped skin from my cuticle and threw it to the ground. My mind meandered, consecutively reaching back to Merlin every time I attempted to switch topics. Eyes meeting his figure, I gazed the man over, a longing stare present from my dilated pupils. I watched silently as Merlin packed his leather-bound spell book in his satchel, drawing a frustrated breath of air as he tossed the bag over his shoulders, holding it by the thing strap connected to it.
Swallowing, I then decided to speak, a woeful expression clear against my features. "Merlin."
"I need some time to think," is all he answered, avoiding my grim tone. Wiping a hand over my face, I bit my lip, letting my eyes take notice to the reflective streak of light shining off his cheek. My brows laced, taking a step forward, trying to comfort him. Before I could reach closer, Merlin already left the air's grasp, darting out of the room, a sniffle sliding through his nose with suppressed motions.

Merlin

Time alone didn't help. The most it did was remind me of the present predicaments that pounded the front door open. I was trapped in a pit of agony and couldn't escape.
Kicking off my shoes, I stumbled about my chambers, clawing aimlessly at the dark for support. The sea of black along with the tears that blanketed my vision was in no aid to my sight. Dropping my satchel—along with spell book—to the floor, my body staggered aimlessly, as my mind swam in thoughts of dread. Taking several, lethargic steps, my body suddenly hit the corner of a table, as I concealed a howl of pain, arching forwards to suppress the beams of heat against the bruised area. Eventually treading across the room, my shins met the frame of the bed, as I then traveled to the side, my body promptly falling on the blankets above.
Laying down, I exhaled with a shiver, drawing the covers over me in a lazy fashion, not even bothering to secure myself between the sheets of warmth. A quiet curse tumbled from my mouth, the pain a constant reminder from now on until the tender flesh will heal. Everything was in such a bad state.
I was falling apart.
A whimper blew from my lips, as a silent tear rolled from my eyes, trailing down to meet the surface of my pillow. We were at war with another powerful country. And I was the cause.
I flinched as a hand suddenly began slowly wrapping around my waist. I must've woken him up. I let my breaths labor as the foreign arm finished pulling me closer to a body of heat behind me. I tried to maintain my composure. "Arthur," I whispered, afraid of speaking any louder with the dread that my voice will crack.
"Where did you go?"
Fingers trailed my skin. Tender and smooth.
Emitting a breath, I let my eyes roam the darkness layed out in front of me. "Someplace that isn't at war with another."
A relaxed chuckle escaped Arthur's mouth with a wispy crack of the lips. "Everything's at war with eachother at the end of the day, Merlin," he stated rather poetically, breathing in my scent with a long inhale, placing his lips to my locks. It wasn't just the sentence that hazed my thoughts, though; it was his tone. He sounded carefree. I squinted my eyes, as jealousy began to surge through me, taking me in waves. How was he able to posses a relaxed attitude when we were about to carry out our death sentences? My mind basked in the thoughts. He was a former prince. He was used to this. Arthur was used to bloodshed and guilty tears.
"What's on that mind of yours, Merlin?" Arthur whispered softly, dropping his face for his forehead to meet my curls. His fingers were now clamped against my skin into a solid hand, guiding his palm up gracefully until it hit my sternum. Then my heart.
"Our deaths," I stated grumpily in return, beginning to ease from the tension when Arthur's legs curled around mine.
"Why?" he started, the cracking of saliva signaling that he was about to enunciate a joke. "You afraid of dying?"
I rolled my eyes, biting my tongue to refrain from shouting. "I'm afraid of you dying."
Sighing—and as if possible—Arthur scooted closer, pressing the pad of his thumb into my skin, feeling my pulse guide him to sleep. "Remember when I was frustrated with you? I kept a pillow between us."
I huffed. "What does this have to do with anything?"
"We ended up in eachother's arms anyway," he continued gently, ignoring my comment of aggravation. Arthur's words were lisped, now on the verge of unconsciousness.
"Why does it matter?" I questioned softly in reply after a moment. "What's the point? What is going to happen after all of this?"
Arthur gave a small mouth pop as he parted his lips to speak. "You'll remember," is all he gave in return.
"Remember? Remember what?"
Everything.
My former life with Arthur. All of the locked memories that had granted me a safe passage through life with him. Only him.
"Merlin," Arthur croaked after several minutes had passed.
It took a while for me to adjust. To think. To speak. "Yes?"
"I don't think I've said this yet, even if I did..." he rambled off continuously, uttering nonsense with a lethargic lisp.
"Arthur," I spoke aloud, cutting him off. "Tell me."
He paused. I felt him swallow against my nape. "I love you."
The statement caught me off guard, as I felt a cord of heat tighten around my heart. I knew it was true. Hell, the man had loved me before my memory was stripped. Even now, he's still fallen for me. This wasn't just any playing about.
This was love.
And I was the taker.
"I..."
"Yes, Merlin?" Arthur whispered, lips grazing my hair. "Do you love me too?"
"I do."
"Then tell me." The hand I earlier found on my heart raised to meet my lips, as his fingers touched them ever so slightly, drawing shivers down my spine. "Tell me you would die for me, Merlin. Tell me you would kiss me even when the world isn't ending." He paused, eventually deciding to rest his palm against my cheek. His skin was cold. Or maybe that was just from my flushed complexion. "Tell me you love me, Merlin."
It took no hesitation, because I knew the answer. It was always there, I just needed someone to guide me to it. "I love you, Arthur."

A/N: Hello everyone! So, this book is beginning to come to a wrap! (Sad, I know!) I have fallen in love with y'all's support and this story itself, so it's a pain to see it finally ending! Anyway, if y'all have enjoyed this book so far, please drop a vote or comment! It means so much! Thanks! Bye!