i'd rather be a riot than indifferent

12. protecting what we love

Freed meets Ivan for the first time and things don't go well.

a/n: this chapter is concurrent with the first chapter of 'crash & burn'

tw for physical/verbal abuse, assault, injuries, and homophobic language

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Five Years Ago

Freed yawned, dropping their head down on their textbook and wishing that they could just absorb the information rather than reading it. They glanced up at the corkboard on their wall, smiling at the picture that greeted them. Ever had taken in the first summer that Laxus had come back - it was the two of them at the beach, Laxus' arms wrapped around Freed's waist, Freed gazing at Laxus adoringly.

The first year apart had been the hardest. They'd texted and e-mailed and Skyped nearly every day, but Freed had spent many evenings curled up their bed (or on the couch between Bix and Ever), crying and missing Laxus harder than they thought they would. Laxus had done his best to keep the scary parts of his life from Freed, but Freed could always tell when Laxus was exhausted or afraid.

The years had flown past. Freed spent their time between university and working at the bookstore, and growing from a participant to a volunteer at the Pride Center. Every summer was spent with one week at camp, and the other seven weeks enjoying the limited time they had with Laxus.

Laxus' most recent departure had been a difficult one. They weren't teenagers anymore – Freed was twenty and Laxus had just turned twenty-one in August – and they had spent most of the summer in serious discussions about their future. Freed struggled with the secrecy of their relationship. On the one hand they didn't want Ivan to know, but it was still unfair. Uncertain.

"Freed!" Bix's voice came up the stairwell and Freed heard the patter of feet running up the stairs. A golden retriever barreled into their room and placed her head on Freed's lap, tail wagging frantically.

"Hey, Baby," Freed said softly. It was still bittersweet to see her instead of Lily, even though Bix had brought Baby home several months ago. Lily had passed away a year or so ago from an unexpected tumor, and Freed still felt the ache of missing her keenly. Bix had been devastated, but Baby was a welcome addition to their family.

"What's up?" they shouted back, rubbing their face. There was no response. Freed sighed, standing from their chair and making their way down the stairs. They could see a light dusting of snow falling through the window – unseasonable for November. Christmas was coming up soon, which was always an emotional time for Freed.

"What's up, Bi-" Freed blinked. Laxus stood in the front entrance of the house, hair wet from the snow, cheeks pink, grin on his face. "Holy shit." Freed skipped down the last few steps, dashing down the hallway and throwing themself at Laxus. "Holy shit, what are you doing here?!"

"I missed you, too," Laxus replied, pressing a kiss to Freed's hair. "I have a surprise for you." Freed leaned back and looked at him curiously. "I'm, um... I'm back." Laxus swallowed. "For good."

Freed felt like they couldn't breathe. Were they dreaming? Laxus... back for good? No more leaving with Ivan, no more late nights texting and crying and missing each other?

"You mean you're staying? Here? In Magnolia?" Laxus smiled, hugging them tighter.

"Yeah." He kicked his shoes off and grabbed Freed's hand, heading into the living room and flopping down on the couch. Freed immediately curled up between his legs, resting their head on his chest.

"I missed you so much," they whispered, running their hand up and down his side. Laxus sighed into the touch, pulling their hair out of its ponytail and carding his fingers through it. "You're really staying? How'd you convince your dad?"