Please Let Me Forget You

Words That Killed Me

Life made me panic knowing that my feelings for Justin might of have been true but fake at the same time. Its just at moments I can totally fall in love with his charming eyes but when it comes to him becoming shady and annoying make me just so irritated.  Which I do blame myself for playing this game. But at the same time I blame him too. If he didn't appear 85% of the time a total jerk and selfish guy maybe I wouldn't be trapped in his tragic tangle mess. But in that 15% left he seems a delicate, sweet, trustworthy guy filled with nothing but laughter. People always see that 15% first which is always his first step into making others  upside down.  Soon after I realized that maybe it would be worth giving us a try but then soon before I could give him a response.  There he was with some other girl already asking them out and in there blind eyes them saying yes. I always told myself "if I was worth it to him then he would of waited!" But then again at least I had common sense. Before I could hear that someone else had a crush on me I only got myself deeper into his stupid mess. His name was Matt he seemed sweet, caring,and just fun to be around.  But I knew myself that not in the world I would be him. That if I wanted to make myself look like I really was playing his game then I would have tried harder. His friends were always making fun of him and pushing him into this uncomfortable spotlight and besides wouldn't blame the guy for being shy. But in him, I could always see in first sight his kindness than in Justin you have to go into layers and layers of unnecessary trouble to find that he can be kind at a time with people. But I could always see in Matt's warm smile that he could be trusted and didn't screw up things on purpose. That rather than Justin who always made you feel like trash even when you didn't need help from someone else.  I never wanted to like matt as more than friend cause my problems were more than enough besides what's the rush into making things more uncomfortable than as it really seems?  Thing is that as people got to see that we started to hang out more often people always predicted that we were dating which made things so crazy at school. People constantly asking me "are you dating Matt?" My response every time a random stranger or teacher asked: "why would be with a person like that when I know myself that i don't have time for that!" Usually, I would get pissed cause most people won't believe me and some rare ones who truly see that I am not lying actually believe me. Matt always tried asking me out multiple times it was cute and all but just never liked him in that way. Until Justin heard that Matt had all eyes on me and decide to hit it off on me. Justin went too much ahead of his game he broke up with his girlfriend and one day he went of to find me in the bus loop gave me a note and told: me" read it when I go!"As he was touching my hand and left. I read it and it said" will you go out with me?" My eyes rolled and before he got on the bus i looked at him gave him like "are you kidding me look." Then got one step closer to me and right there kissed me. Look into my brown dark eyes to tell me "your answer is all that matters!" Then went up to the bus and left me there standing alone in my thoughts.