five.

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i enter tims building, already having a sense of where to head from you know... already being here before. i walk up the stairs and see 1A immediately. i take my next left down the dimly lit hall and walk towards his door. i knock quietly at first but after a few minutes of just standing around, i turn the doorknob to see the door is unlocked.
should i just let myself in? i think to myself.
i slowly open up the door,
"hey tim?" i say loudly trying to make sure he knew it was me. i get no response. i quietly close his door and almost trip on a pair of sneakers that were tossed in the middle of the hallway.

ugh, boys.

i walk into his room seeing him sitting wearing nothing but adidas joggers with the biggest pairs of headphones i've ever seen someone wear. his eyes were glued to his computer screen. i lean my arm on his door frame and knock on the other side of the door frame trying to see if i could get his attention. i look out the multiple windows he has in his room, seeing the sun start to set.
after a minute of failing yet again to grab his attention, i groan and walk right in front of him and the screen. he acknowledges me with a simple head nod, eyes still glued to the screen. he lifts up his index finger from his controller and tells me to move over to the right, away from the screen. he holds out his finger again signaling that he'd be done in a minute. i stand there awkwardly looking around his room trying to find my bra. i sniff the air: the familiar scent of boy and cigs.

"y'know you don't have to just stand there? you can sit on the bed i don't bite." he says with his eyes never leaving the screen.
"youdonthavetojuststandthereidontbiteasdfghjk-." i mimic him. i go over and sit on his mattress with a big thud and huph a bit.
"i can't even hear, but i know what you just said." he says a small smile spreading across his lips. i roll my eyes at him and quickly turn to see what he's focusing so closely on the screen.  my heart stops, gta.
i get a huge sharp pang of sadness while seeing the familiar layout on the screen. i haven't played this since-- wait... he's really bad at this game.

"you know using a handgun is probably why you have such low killage." i say looking closely to the screen.
"okay now i heard that." he says taking off one side of his headphone. he sounds offended. "i mean you could do just fine with the handgun, but..." i reach over and take try to take the controller from his hands but he moves it away. he looks at me like i'm asking him to give up his entire arm.
"oh stop, lemme show you something fast." his eyebrows furrow telling me he's surprised i know how to play a video game.

"you know how to play gta?" he asks almost reading my mind.

"i mean i used to, mostly just watched my brother play though." i say, my hand still reaching out for the controller. he hands it over to me skeptically.  i move up on the bed lying my weight on my right arm, and immediately feel at home with the controller in my hands. i instantly switch his gun to a sniper rifle, heal him, and change his gear. i hear him huff next to me.
i start on my way instantly finding a car. "you see i already tried to hot wire that car it's just probably dead." he says.
i hop into the car, pause to look at him and push the "L1' button five times fast. the sound of the engine starting comes through his headphones. i lift up my eyebrows up at him then turn my focus back to the screen.

as i continue fixing all of the mistakes he's made so far in this game, which are a shit ton. i hear many huffs, sarcastic comments, and eye rolls. after my sixth kill in under five minutes he really starts to be genuinely surprised that i actually know what i'm doing.

"ah there's no way you're gonna get past this part! i've been trying for days!" he sounds so confident i'll fail.

i mentally laugh thinking of the trick to get past this level. the goal is to somehow get away from like ten cars that are chasing you. my brother used to go at full speed for a solid minute, then halt, and do donuts around the cars killing the drivers through the window. he loved that trick so much he made me learn it too.  and i have to admit, it's the thing i do best in this game.
as i'm halting i can feel tim laughing beside me. i start doing the donuts, killing each driver with one shot every time i circle a car.

"what... the... fuck..." tim whispers beside me.
"--- how--- wait, how are you--" tim struggles to speak. i start laughing softly.
after i've killed all the drivers, i speed off trying to find the safe zone.

"you... are a god..." tim says utterly speechless. i look over to him and knod. "yes, this i know."

i hand him the controller after arriving at the safe zone as the game saves his (my) progress. he looks down at me not saying anything. "how? how did you learn to do that last trick?' he asks fascinated. "my brother taught me, he used to play this game so often in high school he'd make up all these cool tricks while playing it over and over." i say.

"your brother is a god." he says simply. i laugh a bit but sadness hits me out of nowhere. i guess i started to tense up a bit because tim asks me, "you good?"

i play it off saying, "yeah it's just draining being a "god" y'know?" he rolls his eyes and starts to get up.

i watch him as he walks over to his tiny kitchen. he has such a small waist, "damn" i say looking down to my own.
"want anything?" he asks over his shoulder. "sure, waters good." i call out.
he comes back handing me a glass of water and my bra.

"was my bra in the kitchen or something?" i ask jokingly. "yup." he says taking a sip of his water. i get flashbacks of him throwing me on top of the kitchen counter and undoing my bra.

we both glance at each other, and both quickly look away taking small sips of our water.

i start getting up, getting ready to leave. as i head towards tims bedroom door, tim reaches and grabs my arm. "you're leaving?" he asks disappointed. "yeah, i mean--" i start twirling my bra in front of him. "i got my bra so."
he starts shaking his head.
"nope, nope you have to teach me your ways." he then tries to find the controller somewhere in his sheets. "are you sure? it's getting late." i say pointing to his windows. "c'mon it's only 7." he says rolling his eyes. "at tops it'll take an hour for me to learn."
i laugh, "with how you play, it could take all night." he lets go of my arm, dramatically clutching his heart.
"you hurt me."

he keeps nudging the controller my way, i cave and drop my bag and bra and sit back next to him, taking my shoes off. "yes." he whispers in relief. i push play, "now pay attention cause i'm only gonna go through this once."
"yes, whatever you say."
i sigh and roll my eyes while secretly my heart is doing little summersaults because he asked me to stay.
~~
this was my favorite chapter to write so far. also i don't know shit about gta so if it's completely incorrect, idk sorry?

delicate. / timothée chalamet auWhere stories live. Discover now