(Gureshin) I wasn't made for him. He was made for me

Unfinished ~ 13

≪ Shinya's P.O.V ≫

"How many tickets would you like?"

"Um.. one is good. Thanks." 

"Alright. Here you go sir, have a good trip." 

I gratefully took the ticket from him and made my way to the train station. The sun was just beginning to come up from the horizon turning the sky from a dark black to a swirling orange and pink. I took a seat on an empty bench, placing my bag next to me. The whole station was empty except for the a janitor who was entering the bathroom. 

As I stared at the train tracks, I felt my phone buzz against my left pocket. I sighed softly and took out of my phone from my pocket. 

Mahiru had been texting me nonstop for whatever reason. All of my notifications were all from her, asking where I was, what I was doing, and if I was in contact with Guren. The only thing she ever cared about was her stupid love life. If she couldn't get an answer from Guren, I would always be her second choice.

I quickly shoved my phone back into my pocket, deleting all her recent text messages about her precious boyfriend. 

As the minutes passed, more and more people began entering the empty train station. Soon the whole platform was full of people holding their tickets waiting for the train to arrive. 

"Excuse me, may I sit down here?" 

I looked up to see a girl standing to the right of me. She had jet black hair that fell down to her waistline and green eyes that stared at me dully. Weirdly I recognized her from some where.. My eyes widened a little when I realized who she was. Her name was Shigure. She was part of Guren's friend group. Always quiet. What was she doing here?

"Er yeah. Sure." I replied awkwardly as a put my bag on my lap so that she could sit down. 

"You're Shinya right?" She asked looking down at me with a frown. 

I wanted to tell her I wasn't but I knew I couldn't lie to her. 

"Yes. That's me." 

"Mahiru's little brother isn't that so?" 

"Yeah, how did you know?" 

"Don't be stupid. Everyone knows everything about Mahiru." 

She glared at me and glanced in the other direction. She had a far away look almost as if she were lost as much as I was. 

"Why are you here Shigure?" Her name felt strange coming out of my mouth. I never would have imagined sitting next to her. Nonetheless talking to her. She never spoke to me once out of all three years of high school. 

"That's not a question I'm willing to answer. Why are you here Shinya?"

"To escape all my problems." I muttered without meaning too. 

Shigure stared at me for a few seconds before looking away again. 

"I see, then I am not the only one..." 

I blinked in surprise. Shigure having problems? That couldn't be possible. She seemed fine to me, but I haven't really been the one to observe other people's feelings. What the hell did I know about people, especially girls?

We sat in silence, not a word came from each other's mouths. Soon enough the train arrived, making a loud squeaking sound as it parked in front of the platform. 

I quickly stood up, holding one bag in one of my arms. 

"I'll see you around Shinya." Shigure lifted up one of her arms and waved to me without smiling.

"Bye." I waved back and walked up the train. When I looked back, she was gone. 

I took a deep breath and got in line with the rest of the passengers. When I got to the front I handed my ticket to man standing in the entrance of the train. 

"Have a good trip." He nodded to me in a polite way as I tried to find a place to sit. 

Lucky for me the train was pretty empty so finding an isolated spot somewhere wouldn't be hard to find. I walked to the back of the train and sat down on a chair next to a table. As more and more people came in, I found myself praying that nobody would sit next to me. I had no desire to be social. Not now at least. 

All of a sudden I heard my phone buzz again. I rolled my eyes as I pulled out my phone for the hundredth time, expecting to see a text from Mahiru, but the message came from Guren instead. I blinked in surprise when the notification appeared on my phone. 

Guren: Where the hell are you?

 Before I could think twice, I shoved my phone back into my pocket. The last thing I needed right now was for Guren to persuade me to come back to him. 

A few minutes later, I felt a buzzing sound against my leg. I grumbled to myself and took out my phone again. This time Guren was calling me. I felt my hand start to shake. A few days back, I would have died in happiness if Guren called me, but now I felt sick to my stomach. Knowing Guren, he wouldn't give up on calling me. When he and Mahiru were together, he would call her countless times until she finally picked up her phone. If she didn't answer, he would end up coming over to our house and of course Mahiru would feel special. 

I looked back down at my phone screen and pressed down on the green icon.

"H-hello?" My voice was incredibly shaky. 

"Shinya! Where the hell are you?!" He yelled angrily. Even his texts were less frightening. 

"Um nowhere you need to know." 

"You can't just leave and not tell me!" 

I couldn't help but laugh at that. When did Guren Ichinose start caring about Shinya Hiragi? 

"It's not like you ever cared. Mahiru probably asked you to call me so she could find out where I am." I muttered. There was the longest pause before he finally said something. 

"... just come back. There's something I need to tell you." 

"What? What could possibly be so important that you can't tell me on the phone?" 

He took a long sigh. 

"Alright. But then you need to promise me you will come back if I tell you." 

"No, I've already made up my mind..."  I didn't want to explain all my feelings to him. I felt used and broken and confused. But for some reason I still wanted to be with Guren more than anything. 

"Promise me, Shinya." 

"I can't." 

"Then I can't tell you."

With those last words he hung up. I felt the train begin to move, and I knew there was no point in going back. Everything felt unfinished and worst of all I felt more lost than before. Why did he have to go around and ruin my life? And what did he want to tell me? 

****

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Authors Note:

I honestly don't have much to say except to thank all of you for continuing to read my story. 

You guys are great!

- Maya N