ii. june

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"You STIL haven't proposed?!" All three of them say at once.

"I mean I just haven't had the time to get Zayn and alone. He's been really busy with classwork because he decided to take a summer session to finish his degree in time for the holidays instead of next spring. And I don't know... I'm just so scared to do it" I say, looking down at my feet.

I'm ashamed. Who wouldn't be? It's been three weeks since Zayn arrived and I still haven't popped the question. I thought by now I would be happily calling Zayn my fiancé. Guess not.

"Dude what the fuck?" Harry says.

"Yeah, what the fuck?" Louis follows.

"Literally what the fuck" Niall continues.

"I still have the the rest of the month" I say as an excuse.

Niall pulls out his phone, "It's June 7. Next thing you know, it's already the 30th. You're on borrowed time Liam, and you're playing it too safe."

"Yeah I know... I hate myself for being this scared. It's like I can't do anything right, not even something as simple as this"

I can feel everyone's look change and now they seem to be intrigued by what I just said.

"Huh?" I hear Louis say, breaking the silence in the room.

"Forget about it" I say while looking at the window.

"Anyways," Harry begins to say, "This isn't easy Liam. A fucking proposal shouldn't be a simple question. It's something elaborate. It's meant to tell whoever you're asking the question, that you truly, deeply care about them and pay attention to all the little things in their lives and manage to bundle all the happy times into one big scene on top of the Eiffel Tower with a bouquet of pink roses topped with a night out in the town at restaurant where I can stuff my face with a steak..."

"Harry. This is your idea of a proposal." I interrupt before he could go any further. I could tell that Louis was keeping a mental note of everything Harry was saying for a later use.

"Oh right"

"Anyways, the point is Liam: you need to get over that scared shit and pull yourself together to get the man of everyone's dream to officially be only tied to you" Niall says.

"Yeah... right. Of course. The dream."

I kept looking at the window. The thought of running away creeps my mind and I think about it for a hot minute. I wouldn't have to worry about anyone or anything. But I would be leaving everyone worried, especially Zayn. Shit, how would Zayn feel? Just runaway and forget everyone exists. But Zayn. Italy is always nice during the summer. But fucking Zayn. Say it's a summer abroad program for university. They'll understand. But when will I propose?

Just runaway Liam. Forget about everything.

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