New year New me

Chapter 7 - My First love

(Naveeah's point of view)

Flynn Mackintosh of all people.

My first instinct was to run and run fast, I refused to look back because I didn't want to be there when Flynn came out of our headmasters office.

I dashed into the nearest classroom once I felt that I was far enough away and lucky for me, the classroom was empty. Assuming this room would stay empty for a while, I slammed the door shut then slowly slid down the door and my body just collapsed on the floor. My hands instinctively wrapped around my legs and my head rested on my knees.

Deep breaths...

This is the moment where I finally let it all out.

Crouched here on the floor, all alone, I quietly sobbed to myself. I was trying so hard to contain the sound of my cries so that no one would hear me. I don't cry very often, I mostly try to keep all my emotions in for as long as possible but in certain moments like this, it's inevitable and I don't like people seeing it or hearing me cry hence why I'm trying to contain myself.

I will admit that sometimes letting it all out and crying is relieving, it's healthy, as it feels like you can finally breathe again, you feel at peace and the most relaxed you could be. Because all the weight that had been dragging you down has finally been lifted off your shoulders, even if it's only for a short while.

But it does still show that I'm weak, a weak person prone to my emotions. By showing an emotion such as sadness, by having a breakdown like right now, it just proves that I'm weak and anyone can take advantage of me when I'm in this state. It's happened before and I don't wish for it to happen again, weakness is easy to take advantage of. That's why I would rather cry alone, where no one can see me, judge me or use it against me.

"Naveeah? Are you in there?", yelled out Alexa and I hadn't even realised she followed me through the many halls of our school.

"Come on babe, let me in or at least talk to me so I know you're okay. I know it must have been tough and shocking to see him of all people."

"I'm fine really Lexi, I just need a minute to myself, please. Can I meet up with you later?", I suggest, hoping she'll take the bait and go back to our friends.

"Okay then, meet me at our usual spot at break. I love you Nav, I know you'll be okay", she whispers in her kind voice.

"Yeah, I love you too Lexi", I try to say without sounding like I've been crying.

I heard her faint steps wander off and then once again, I was alone.

But... not for long.

I started to hear another person, a different person, not Lexi that's for sure. This person had louder, heavier footsteps and I heard them coming closer and closer till they were directly outside the door I was leaning against.

They remained silent for a few minutes but then all of a sudden, they knocked on the door. I ignored whoever it was, just assuming that it was a random student. They must've gotten the picture as I heard them slowly start to back away.

"Alright well if you won't let me in or talk to me then I'll just break the fucking door down. Watch out love."

Wait what?

Oh shit...

I jumped out of the way and in barged in Lucas, whacking the door open, nearly knocking it off it's hinges.

"What the hell Lucas!", I screamed, "You could've hurt me!"

I was furious and looking at his perfect face made it really hard for me to remain furious too.