The Need to Become Fearless

"Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will."

The weight of all our passion is heavy and both of us need a moment to breathe. Jack's head is on my shoulder as we just lay in my bed naked and wrapped up in each other's arms. His nose is against my neck, and I just enjoy being with him. It's just us.

"If I die from afterglow my ghost will haunt you to demand more orgasms like that," he mumbles in my ear.

"Babe, if you want another one, all you have to do is ask," I chuckle and smooth down his wild hair.

I meant it as a joke... well, sort of, but the way his head shoots up coupled with the dangerous look in his eyes, he was absolutely going to take advantage of it.

"You serious?"

"Jack, I love you. I don't think I'll ever have it in me to say no to you."

With a wicked grin, he's back in the end table, rummaging around for a fresh condom and coating it in more lube, all the while I lay here like an exhausted starfish.

"Hands and knees. Now, Mark." His words take on a new tone, and I know I'm in for more than just making love. Jack's kinks are already bleeding in to the scene and we haven't even started yet.

I move as quickly as I can to obey and get on my hands and knees. The past memory of his fingering me on his couch is already getting me hard again. His hand pushes me down into the pillow and I groan low. He already pressing inside me, and a whirl of pleasure is causing me to make sounds I didn't think were possible.

Giving my ass a quick smack he's pounding me hard this time around. It's not making love, but pure and dirty fucking, and I love more than I can even start to explain.

"I want to hear you scream this time," he moans. "I want to know how much you want me to cum inside you, baby. Tell me how much you want me. Now.

"Fuck, Jack. I want it, fuck me. Fucking bite me, ah," my throat constricts and my muscles contract as I feel his breath against my spine before he sinks his teeth in, and a satisfying pinch of pain shoots through me.

His mouth moves up and down as his hips swivel in ungodly circles. Little nips are left here and there, but his teeth graze over me roughly again, and I know my moan must sound awfully feminine compared to my usual low tone.

"Look at you fucking falling apart for me. Who's in charge, Mark? Fucking tell me." His voice sounds so unlike him, deep and authoritative, but it's so god damn sexy that I almost forget where I am.

"Y-you are," I stutter, my brain barely able to manage anything but keeping myself from passing out from pleasure. "You're in charge. Oh fuck...."

Another snap of his hips and I'm climaxing all over my bedsheets. My member is twitching like crazy and I'm exhausted. I hear him giggle, and turn to look back at him.

"I'm not done with you yet," he smiles, and starts to bang me even harder.

My mouth is disconnected from the rest of me and I am making almost inhuman noises. He grunts long and low as he cums, and with a flick of his wrist I'm climaxing again.

"Oh god," I scream. "Oh god...oh god..."

"Are you good? Mark?" He giggles, and I have to use all of my energy to open an eye and grin.

"M'okay, Jack. Everything is fine," the sigh comes out and I melt further into my soft sheets.

"You're gonna be really sore if we don't get you taken care of, baby. Do you think you might wanna take a warm shower or something?"

His voice is transfixed back to its normal sound, soft and loving as he draws lazy designs along my back with delicate fingers.

"You just fucked me until I'm nearly comatose and now you want me to get in water?"

It's not an accusation, and I don't mean that he's forcing me into anything whatsoever, but the idea of it isn't my favorite. But still, if he's there, it'll be okay, right? Plus, he's right. I'm going to be hurting tomorrow.

"Sorry," he whispers, laying down next to me as he continues to rub my back with soft fingers. "Maybe we just relax for a while? Then work on getting you able to walk again?"

I grunt and sit up, much to the surprise in the bright blue eyes. I'm already starting to feel my muscles cursing our rough sex life, but I don't care. Maybe it's the dopamine still flowing, or the way he's looks in the evening light, but I'm pushed to do something that I have haven't wanted to do since I was four years old.

"I want to stand out in the rain," I say, looking into his amazing face. "With you."

"Wait, what? You realize that there's literally flood warnings going off everywhere, right? It might be really stressful..."

The furrow of his brow let's me know there's a real concern, but for once I'm not worried. I'm confident.

"It'll be okay. We'll be okay. Come out with me. Please?"

He swallows thickly, but nods his head and throws on a comfortable outfit, helping me to do the same. And then his hand is in mine, but for once it's me leading him to the water, not the other way around. With once final deep breath, I'm pushing through the door and standing in the rain.

It's cold, and presses my hair to my forehead, but it's... not bad? The anxiety is there, sitting like lead in my gut, but piece by piece it's leaving. And it's because Jack is helping me to carry the load.

"How ya feelin'?" He asks from beside me, but I don't really have the words to answer. So instead, I look towards the sky at the falling water and smile, a real and genuine smile, for the first time in a long time.