The Story of Lady Deadpool

Chapter Seven

I sat on a roof top, legs swinging off the side while singing along to the radio.

" HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME!" I screeched in my beautiful voice.

Jeez, what are you? A dying hyena.

I sighed and shook her my. " Did I ask you to comment on my beautiful voice " I growled, as the voice in my head stayed silent for a while.

I yawned, standing up and starting to dance to another song.

" YOUR THE BEST! AROUND! NOTHINGS EVER GONNA BRING YOU DOWN! " I continued.

Please, kill me now.

" Shut up " I mumbled.

No, anyways, I'm going to assign a mission to you.

" A mission? What am I? One of Fury's little agents?"

No, but your my agent.

" I swear, sometimes I just want to shot myself in the head "

Go ahead, I'm not stopping you, but don't you want to retell the event that you went through just a few minutes ago?

" What event?"

Ya know, with the big green guy.

" You mean the hulk?" I asked, placing a hand on my hip.

Yes, the ' Hulk '

" Alright then. Reader, it's time to listen up. It's story time with Lady Deadpool " I smiled.

" It all started like this-"

*

I stared at the big green monster before me, a little scared.

" HULK SMASH!" It yelled, when seeing me and brung it's fists down. I collided with a marvel comic book store, rubbing my head as a brick fell on it.

" Ow, ya know that really hurt " I growled, standing up.

You should let SHIELD deal with him.

" No " I replied to the voice in my head. " I wanna hug the big guy " I replied, holding out my arms and running towards it.

Hulk was about to smash me, but I flipped over him, landing on his shoulders, pulling out my gun and shooting it's head.

After my ammo ran out I jumped off, bowing.

" That is how it-" I was cut off as hulk grabbed me, smashing me against the ground.

I told you to let SHIELD deal with him.

" You. Were. Right. " I said in between getting smashed into the ground.

I finally teleported away, going up to a pay phone and dialing SHIELD.

" This is a secure-" The operator started to say.

" Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say. Anyways, there's a big green guy trying to smash me to pieces. I would appreciate it if you would take him away " I shrugged, hanging up and backing away as hulk smashed the pay phone to pieces.

" You know, there's always anger management!" I yelled, only making it more angry.

Not a good idea.

" You got a better one?" I exclaimed, dodging all the hulks attacks.

*

" And then, SHIELD came in. But I already had that monster begging me to spare him " I grinned.

No. He smashed you repeatedly into a wall.

" SHUTUP! They aren't supposed to know that " I growled.

They do now. So, are you ready for that mission.

" Whatever. Well, until next chapter readers! " I grinned, waving.