Blogbuster - A comedy-laced blogger sci-fi thriller

3 - Goodbye Joy

Assistant Joy handed Roman a chill bottle filled with authentic Himalayan mountain water.

“Sir, that was an incredible speech. The way you moved, the way you smiled, it was just mesmerizing. Even though I stood next to the freezer, you made every ounce of me melt.”

Roman beamed.

“Not just you, Joy. Did you see the audience ? They loved me. Five thousand guests and all of them were blown away. That’s quite an accomplishment, I have to admit. And they’re going to love the Blogbuster even more once I reveal the game show mechanics.”

Joy clutched her notepad and nodded. 

“Oh, they will for sure, sir.”

They locked eye contact, one on one. Roman smiled.

“Let’s walk, baby, I’m done with talking.”

He clutched her body to his and whisked her away from the hall area, right into the maze of backstage alleys and VIP rooms. Stax grinned at his assistant. 

“I think the world is craving something different, Joy, something more intense than farting cats and camera pranks. The world wants something deeper, an emotional ride that shakes them up like a nitro blender.”

He flashed his trademark Stax smile. It worked.

“And I’m the one who’s going to give it to them.”

She nodded, wanted to say something, but Roman pressed his finger against her strawberry-painted lips.

So, don’t speak baby, just don’t. Let me show you what matters now.

Backstage. Roman hoped he’d ducked the crowds, but he hoped in vain. Peering down the hallway, he noticed a horde of crew members, reporters and fans blocking the narrow path up ahead. He couldn’t catch a break no matter where he went. It was tough to be Stax. Still, he was a pro, so he put on his trained smile and thrust Joy forward like a knight to his crusade. War-ready for the media onslaught. The first reporter tried to flank him.

“Mr. Stax, that was an incredible speech, but you didn’t reveal anything about the Blogbuster. What can we expect ?”

Another reporter shoved his mic up to Stax’ nose.

“Yes, what exactly is it ? Would you like to clarify ?”

Nah, Stax didn’t. That’s why he kept his mouth shut and brushed aside all the hands pawing his onyx-black suit. Some even wanted their own personal high-five clap with the millionaire superstar, but Roman didn’t return the gesture. He hated shaking sweaty hands. Why couldn’t this nation welcome bow-only greetings like the Japanese did ?  All this stranger-touching, it gave him the creeps. Especially when they were butt-ugly monkeys with spines made out of slime. Thanx, but no thanx.

“Hey everyone, I sooo appreciate your continued interest. But it’s been a long, tough day.”

The media people sighed. Some shot more questions at his direction. Roman put up a shield made out of swagger.

“Now if you excuse me, I need some quality time by myself.”

He waved them away with a smile, pushed himself through the crowd and looked for his VIP suite. The media swarm nodded and left with shoulders slumped, one disappointed face at a time. But when Joy joined the leaving, Roman grabbed her arm.

“Where do you think you’re going ?”

“Didn’t you just say you wanted to be alone ?”

“Joy, general instructions don’t apply to you, silly.”

She smiled. Sometimes a wink said more than a thousand lies.

“It’s time to enjoy ourselves.”

Roman ushered her into his VIP suite. Clapped on the light, clap, clap, and chose the enchanted ambience mode while his smart system played some smooth Jazz in the background. He marched towards the dark wood bar and concocted two White Russians. They toasted, clinked chilled glasses and sipped the cocktails with laser-intense eye contact.

“Thanks,” is all Joy managed to say.

“Let’s celebrate.”

Which was Stax lingo for :

Undress, go bounce on the bed and rub what the parents gave ya.

Rubby dee rub in ze Stax club.

Fast forward.

Lots of sweat and exotic animal sound effects later, Joy put her clothes back on and noticed Roman sipping a hot cocoa with lemon cream. He laid on his emperor-sized bed like a hero who had just conquered Mt. Everest. Which in a way he just did.

Joy said,

“What’s your next step, Roman ?”

He took another sip of his drink, paying only attention to his liquid refreshment. The cream tasted sweet on his lush lips.

“Don’t call me Roman, call me Mr. Stax.”

She finished her ponytail, put on a faint smile, because Roman surely liked to joke.

“Mr. Stax, what’s the next step in the Blogbuster ? Is there anything I can do for you ?”

He concentrated on his drink without looking at her.

“Nah, that won’t be necessary, Joy, it’s all taken care of.”

She raised her eyebrows.

“Already ? I thought that’s my department ?”

He looked at her for the first time after the rub session. 

“Not anymore.”

Joy’s face froze mid-expression. Roman moaned.

“Joy, it was fun, really, but now you should go. I’ve got business to do.”

He waved her away like a neglected dog.

“Ah yeah, almost forgot. You have twenty-two hours left to clear your desk.”

Joy swallowed. This time her spit.

“You’re kidding, right ?”

She tried to smile, but it felt forced. Roman squinted.

“Ninety percent of the time, yeah, but now ? Not so much.”

Joy’s face morphed into a deluxe blank expression. Roman sighed, and he was sick of sighing today.

“Joy, baby. Don’t big-deal this. You got ten seconds to leave before I call security.”

She flipped him the finger with her feline hand and cursed till her mouth shot spit bombs at his direction. She stormed out the suite and slammed the door shut. Roman Stax sighed, now for the last time, took another sip of his White Russian and checked out the possible contestants for his Blogbuster show. He wanted to have at least one maverick vlogger.

Maybe he’d found one already.