TOO ALL THE BOYS IVE LOVED

The four boys

We all have different perspectives on love. I feel like the universe gives us all different kinds of love for all the different people we meet In our lifetime. We have the feeling of love when our first child is born, we have the feeling of love when it comes to family and friends , love when it comes to our favorite things in life. Even love when it comes to boys we meet. I have four boys in my life I've loved and liked or at least I thought I've loved.  I wrote each of them a letter filled with feelings I've caught for them. But this isn't your ordinary "to all the boys I've loved" where all the letters get out to all 5 boys and I live happily ever after with one. Unfortunately although I wished it would have turned out like that this is the real world and in the real world some people just don't get as lucky when it comes love. The four boys are Eric, Joesph,Elijah, and Christopher.

Now Eric is a very different kind of guy. I know us females say "he's different" and then he really doesn't turn out to be but Eric really was and still is. Eric was kind of the boy of my dreams in a way. He was tall and lightskin. We were in the same grade but never the same class because Eric was always in the honors classes . He's really shy, that was the first that caught my eye. Not only shy but he's very sweet and caring. A lot of boys pretend to be that but never has he changed his character not even around his friends. He was real and that was one of the things I adored about him.

Joesph!!! Now he's a whole other story. Have you ever had one of those boys who break your heart but yet you never really dated him? Well yeah that was Joesph for you. I met Joesph freshman year. My charger had broke and I needed to borrow one so he was kind enough to let me borrow his and that's how it all started with him. I had been using his charger for the past few days in til he needed it back in computer class. I had asked him if I could have it, he looked at me for almost a minute straight and then I was like" JOESPH" and he said " oh yeah you can have it sorry" I wondered why he just dozed off like that. Joesph then became my bestfriend in a way. He made me laugh when I didn't even want to. He was one of those people where you could be completely sad but when he comes around every bad thought goes away. You see Joesph was one of those nerdy kids but had one big glow up. I realized I had caught feelings for him so I started to push him away. Let's just say it worked and it was one big mistake. After we had came back from fall break we had faded completely away. But you see Joesph wasn't Joesph. Like I said Joesph had this huge glow up sophomore year. He began to start hanging out with a few of the cool kids. He started to skip school, and smoke weed and I believe he did other things like lean and all but I have no idea. The very first time I had spoken to Joesph again was my birthday. He's birthday is the 14th of may and mines the 15th of may. On my birthday he had walked into class and came up to me and said happy birthday and gave me something. A sausage! It made my whole entire day because I had never received a sausage as a birthday present. I thought it was the most cutest thing ever. After that we didn't really talk much in til I became really sad posting my feelings on snap because I had nowhere else to really expressed how I felt. One night he had swiped up and asked me what was wrong and I let it all out. He wrote me one of the nicest paragraphs ever and I told him how much I had missed him. We became friends again. Well I started to realize I loved him. I remember seeing him so high out of it one day at school he was laying on the desk and could barely open his eyes because he was so gone it broke my heart into a million pieces because that wasn't the Joesph I knew. Well me being me I started posting about this boy on snap who had my heart. He always swiped up asking who and I never had the guts to tell him I loved him more than anything in this world In til I moved schools. He told me he felt the same but as we can see now that's just one pretty lie. He told me one day we're going to have one big family. We would talk on the phone whenever he had a chance. He would call me the prettiest girl he ever met. I loved every part of him and I still do.

Elijah? I met him at camp two years ago. The first year we never really talked. He was a cit and I worked in the kitchen. Every time he would go thru the line he would smile at me. And if you guys could just see his smile it's just ahhhhh. His older brother had came into the camp cafeteria as I was cleaning up and he had said " are you Chloe ?" I replied with " yes why?" He then said " Elijah said wassup with it." I just laughed and walked away. I've never really been one of those girls who guys like so that's why I did what I did. Well this year was so different for us. All the girls wanted Elijah but he really never showed any of the girls attention except for me. On Wednesday night after his cabin fell asleep he came up to the game room around 1 am where I was sitting. We talked about things we never really told anyone else. He would make fun of me whenever he seen me but in a playful way. Every time he seen me he would sometimes touch me as well but you know In a playful way. If I looked down or upset he would ask me if I was okey. Now keep in mind we went to a church camp so Sunday the pastor wanted us to come. So I got him to come. I walked in church Sunday and started talking to his older brother speaking of his older brother me and him are really close. Well anyways I walked past Elijah with my head down and he said " wow Chloe being fake" I was like no not at all. Finally Sunday service was started and he said "okey where we sitting?" I was replied with "oh your gonna sit with me?" He replied with "yeah of course." There's more to the story but Elijah was the same as Eric. He was one of those boys who make you feel so happy inside and When your around them you get nothing but good vibes . I liked him so much I know this is about love but maybe if we went further I could see it turning into it.

Last but not least there's Christopher my ex. After Joesph christopher was the one I went to after 4 months. Christopher made me feel a feeling that was no like other. He made me feel pretty and cared for. He was a guy that every girl would want. Cooks for you, writes handwritten love letters to let you know he cares about you more than anything. But sometimes I feel like we meet the right one at the wrong time. Breaking up with him hurt me more than ever. I seen the pain in his eyes but me and him were on two different paths.

I can never really tell any of them how I truly feel because I never really got the chance and now that there all In relationships there's really no point to but at least you can write a letter explaining how you feel even if they never get sent.
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A/N: I know this is extremely horrible but this is my first book I've ever wrote so I'm still learning. I'll grow and progress overtime. Let me know feedback like what I need to work on etc....