Remember Me || Shawn Mendes

Back Home

*knock on the door*

“Uhhh…..yea?”

“Hey Shawn, buddy we're pulling up to return the bus.”

“Okay thanks”

“Sure thing man.”

****

My phone started to ring in my pocket

Caller ID: Mom

“Hello…”

“Shawn! Honey are you almost home I need to see you already.”

“Yeah, mom I'm almost home…..we're getting ready to return the the bus, then I'm gonna head home to rest a little before my show in 2 days.”

“Oh honey I'm so happy. We really miss you when youre on the road.”

“I know mom….believe me I miss you guys a lot too.”

“So Shawn….”

“Yeeess…..”

“Rose called….”

“Okay….I'm guessing there's more?”

“Yeah….well...she wanted me to ask you something. “

“Okay…”

“Well, they're throwing a little get together considering its been 4 years  since…..well you know…..and they just wanna be with everyone…including you..”

“Oh umm….mom I don't know…...I mean I just wanted to relax at home for a couple days before my show…”

“I understand honey…..we all do…..she just wanted me to make you aware that they were having something in case you wanted to go ya know…”

“Yea …..I get it…”

“Alright hun, just hurry home ….I'll see you soon. Love you.”

“Love you mom.”

“Alright hun bye-bye”

“Alright bye”

****

I know she really wanted me to go but I just don't wanna be with anyone on this day I also don't think this is really a time to through a get together…..I just wanna be alone

I need her…...just her.

She's my happiness…

And right now she's my sadness….

***1 hour later***

Feels a little weird to be back home….

But also comforting

I walked through the front door and put my bags down….I know my mom heard me cause within seconds I heard footsteps getting closer…

“SHAWN!!!”

Next thing I knew my mom slammed into me wrapping her arms around my neck.

“Hey mom…”

I squeezed tight not wanting to let go.

Honestly it felt so good to hug her.

My moms hugs were always my safe place as a kid…

When she would hug me everything was okay all the bad things were gone….

The fear, The sadness, The Tears, The Loneliness, all of it was gone.

To this day it still feels safe but the only thing now is when I stop hugging her the bad things are still there….

I wish I could understand why a mothers hug is so special.

“I missed you much, Shawn.”

“I missed you too mom.”

“Come on your dads outside grilling in the back for back.”

My dad was always someone who the best advice.

No matter what situation it was and whether or not he had ever been in the situation before his advice always helped and worked.

I know he has been waiting for me to ask him for advice on dealing with this…..

But I am just not ready…..I don't even know what I'd say to him….

**later that night***

“Alright thanks mom and dad for dinner I'm gonna go head up to bed.”

“Alright son love you, talk with you in the  morning.”

“Night hun, and please check on your sister that peace and quiet is making me suspicious”

“Hah, alright mom,I will love you both...night.”

*****

After checking on Aliyah I went straight to my room and locked the door

I didn't want anyone coming in….I just wanted to be alone….

In the quiet….