Dear Older Me

9/17/18

I woke up. That's good. It's Monday. I don't want to be awake. Fuck life in the ass like hell. Well, I'm at school. I don't really want to be but oh well. Well, fuck. I just got news that it's the birthday one of my friends. Like, in all our time of being friends. Is it that I forgot? I happen to be forgetful. But I memorized Ivan's birthday in a week. I feel bad now. AJ and Jordan are not friends anymore. I am siding with AJ. I haven't known her as long but Jordan has always been a bit of a bitch. Fuck English.

Art was good. I'm not angry anymore but I have homeroom with her. Do I have to listen to her blabber? Yea, I know. I'm not being nice. She'll live. I'm doing good on my English so I'm not mad at that. I'm eating Miss Vickie's chips: jalapeño and sea salt. It's good. I'm drinking a berry propel. I'm hella cold. Heyyyyyyyy, Ivan! I'm cold! Fix it! I'm going to work on the rest of my English. We had a pop quiz in English. I missed three questions. In Spanish we had a make up day. I'm allowed to redo quizzes I failed so I'm happy. Lunch was good. I went to Patman's Pizza and spent five dollars on a soda and two pizzas. I'm bored. Oh, update: I still have the purple ponytail.

All my friends are in the cafeteria so I have no one to talk to or ignore. I'm going in the cafeteria to finish my food and talk. Welp, fuck. I talked but everyone wants to kill Skylar and I totally relate. He is a bully and an ass, as well as one of the reasons some of us cut and stress. My friends wanted to fight and I think Skylar knew since he brought Landon, who is like six feet tall and 300 pounds. I shoved him. I've known him forever so I didn't care. I know he is wary of me. I'm small, like 5'3" or so, and I weigh 113 pounds, so they stopped and just argued. I was still in a blind rage so I had a friend who was doing nothing about the drama hold my hand and she let me hold it until I calmed down. Then I told her to get a teacher but the bell rang so it didn't matter. We had a free day in geometry because we went to look at rings. It was pointless. We watched The Office for the rest of class. Listen to "Lean On Me." In English 1 we did an easy paper. Biology was just notes.

I walked home while eating chips, the salt ones. I talked to dad and then took a nice bath using a charcoal and vanilla bath bomb. I watched Snow White and the Huntsman with dad. I'm going to eat some shrimp ramen. Food's good and mum's home. I'm outside. It's nice, I guess. I see my outdoor coming to see their mama. That makes me happy. Our small dog is sick. I'm sad and worried. He pukes up puke bigger than his head. The vet says he is in fair condition so it's better than critical. *Sigh* Watching Bones with mum and dad.