Wires

Chapter 2

Hours passed by and before I knew it, it was almost 10 pm. The same doctor I spoke to before walked out to help another patient, and I ran up to him as fast as I could. "Is she okay? Can I talk to her?" I pleaded. I could feel myself getting anxious.

"Quentin, she won't talk to anyone. You're welcome to see her but don't expect to get any words out of her."

I rushed through the door and ran into the room she was staying in. The nurses had wiped all the running makeup off of her face. She had stopped crying. She was hooked up to all kinds of machines and had bandages covering her left arm. I sat down in the chair against the wall and just stared at her.

"Are you okay?" I asked hesitantly.

"Okay? You think I'm fucking okay?" she said loudly, while propping herself up. "You see what you've done? If you would've just kept fucking driving and hit me, none of this would've happened and you wouldn't have to worry about me or all of this."

"You wanted me to hit you? Why?" I asked.

"Why else?" She replied.

That's when it hit me. This girl wanted to die. She wasn't just drunk or crazy. "What happened before you ran in front of me? If you don't mind me asking." I looked down and scratched my neck.

"Why would I tell you? You don't care. You don't understand." she said aggressively.

"Do you know why I stopped to help you? Because I saw myself in you. Now what the hell happened?" I said. I couldn't believe I just said that. I got a chill and that's when she looked at me with the deepest sadness in her brown eyes.

"You wanna know what happened? I've been awful sad for a long time. My dad left when I was 5 and my mom's been an alcoholic since then. I moved in with my grandmother when I was 7. Every single day I can't help but think about my dad and how it was my fault that he left. Grandma always tells me not to blame myself but it's so hard because I know I'm the only one who could possibly take the blame. I see pictures of them before I was born and they were so happy, my parents. I was too big of a responsibility so he booked. My fault." she said.

"But-" I started to speak and she cut me off.

"On top of all that, I've got no one but my grandma. And I love her to death. But I can't keep living like this, if she finds out what happened she'll just blame herself. I can't do that to her. That's why I need to die, so she, let alone anyone else, won't have to worry about me. She wasn't home and I was drinking and I tried overdosing on her sleeping tablets and when that didn't work, I started cutting. I eventually just gave up and started running and that's when I ran out into the street and you stopped."

I had nothing to say. I didn't want her to yell at me again but it seemed like that was inevitable. I looked at her and asked "What's your name?"

"Emily." she said softly.

"I'm Quentin." I said. I looked down at my watch and saw that it was almost 11. "Look, Emily, I've gotta get home, but please call me when you get the chance." I tore the corner off of a paper on a clipboard sitting on the counter and scribbled my number on it. "Goodnight Emily." I said as I started to exit the room.

"Wait, Quentin," I heard her say. I stopped and turned around.

"Yes?" I said.

"Thank you," she said in a small voice. I nodded and proceeded to leave.