Twenty days of friendship. That's all that high school senior, Quinn Reid's ex boyfriend wants and then he promises to leave her alone forever. After some initial hesitation, she agrees to be his friend in exchange for her solitude when the twenty...
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I read a quote somewhere about people being so broken that they get mad at others for being whole, and it resonated with me. And I don't mean that in the way that you think. I'm a little ashamed to admit that I'm the broken one and I'm mad at everyone who isn't cracked like I am.
I wasn't always like this. A year ago, I was all bright and shiny and saw the world through clean as fuck windows. Now my windows are stained and I'm jagged and rough.
I could blame my ex boyfriend for making me all dark and twisty, but I suppose that wouldn't be fair to him. I did this to myself when I let my anger and hurt fester and turn to hate. Blood-boiling, toe curling, poison infested hate.
I'm drawn out of my internal monologue by my friends' bickering and it takes everything in me not to yell at them to just shut the fuck up.
"So, what? You need it, but I want it more," Sam hisses at Mandy.
Mandy gives her a look so full of hate that I look away. "You're so selfish!" She says this in that loud whisper voice that she does when she thinks that she's just whispering like a regular person.
I tune them out and poke the lumpy potatoes on my tray. I don't get involved in their fights anymore. Not since they'd left me to fight mine alone and had chosen instead to remain "impartial" although I was supposed to be their friend. Bitches.
"Quinn, can you believe her?" Mandy asks me, and I just look at her. She raises her brow at my silence and crosses her arms. "Quinn."
"I wasn't listening," I say honestly. I know that it'll piss her off. I hope that it does.
Sam laughs and shovels a spoonful of potatoes in her mouth. "Are you coming over tonight?"
"No."
She frowns. "You never come over anymore."
"Is your brother going to be there?" Her brother being my ex-boyfriend, Jessie. Unfortunate, I know.
"Yes, but..."
"No," I say again. "I'm going to Boy Sam's party." I'm not. I'm going home and maybe taking a long nap before going for my evening run.
Sam doesn't like my answer. She purses her lips and pushes her tray away. "You'd rather hang out with an asshole like Sam? What the hell is wrong with you?"
I pick up my coke. "So many things. So many fucked up things, Samantha."
"How long are you going to punish us?" Mandy asks. "It's been an entire year and you're still acting like a raging bitch."
"I'm not acting," I say as I stand. "See you later."
I hear Mandy's high-pitched whisper saying that I'm impossible and I smile.
I'm not punishing them. I just don't like them that much anymore. I know that I should stop hanging out with them if I dislike them so much, but I can't. Our lives are too entwined, and I don't want to spend my senior year feeling even more awkward. And I know that they'll never let me go either for the same reasons. Also, they're hoping that I'll forgive them for taking Jessie's side in the breakup.
