The night quickly faded as I rolled around aimlessly in bed. All I could think of was our conversation, and him leaving. It was hard to know how to react, after finding everything so emotional he'd now pulled out more information I was unaware of. I tried to respect the fact it was a long time ago, yet it dug deep into my mind. This had proved his lack of love for me. I'd fallen asleep finally, yet still dreamt of odd memories and moments I'd longed for after the breakup. Things like him coming back for me, even messages from him. After he'd left, I would wait by my phone for hours, wishing he'd contact me. That's when I'd brought myself into a depressive state. I really started to hate life around that point; I had stopped functioning. Eventually I'd managed to pull myself out of bed and into the lounge, where everyone had been awake.
"Did you sleep well?" I asked the men in front of me - it was hard to believe they'd been in their twenties, though. It was 11am, and they'd all been watching Aladdin on the television. I'd chuckled when I'd seen the odd sight; college friends watching a Disney movie sat on duvets, eating cereal. I'd received nods in response, as they were too engrossed in the film. I'd known Lewis had a secret soft spot for Disney, though I didn't dare mention it to anyone else otherwise he'd kill me. After watching over them for a few minutes, I looked to Jane. She gave a stare, as if to ask if I was okay. I smiled at her, gesturing over to the kitchen. The floorboard creaked as I made my way over, her trailing behind me.
"Thank you for helping last night, it means so much." I told her. We weren't awfully close, however she knew of my condition, and the procedures to take when something happens. A few times I'd ended up having episodes at dance, especially around the beginning when everything was new to me, and I barely knew anyone there. I couldn't afford hospital bills, so I had asked she'd take me to my apartment and find someone to stay with me. She did exactly that every time, never letting me down. "I owe my literal life to you." I said, hugging her. She returned the gesture, closing both arms around me. When pulling away, we shared a few moments of quietness before her face curled, as if cringing. I questioned whether she was going to ask me something, though I already knew she was going to.
"Can I ask what happened last night with George?" She tried to smile through furrowed eyebrows. "He woke all of us up when he was leaving." She seemed curious, her eyes gleaming with anticipation. Jane loved gossip, yet she never asked me anything. Usually she'd throw in an odd guess, that was the extent of it.
"He's my ex, and things didn't end well. I asked him to leave." I replied. It was the truth, despite the fact I was holding back a lot more information. She nodded, lips pressed together.
"He's hot." I rolled my eyes at her comment, laughing.
"I know he is." I whispered back, winking. She grinned, going over to my coffee maker and grabbing a mug. She always drank immense amounts of coffee when staying over, I had guessed she didn't sleep well, though never asked. It shocked me how little we really knew about one another, yet we had mutual respect. That was all I wanted from a friendship at the moment.
"You know, he was asking about you all night. I think he still likes you." She said, pressing a button. I thought for a few moments, wondering if he had cared. It had probably been him trying to find out more about me, because of how long it had been. Testing the waters, or seeing how much his actions had affected my later life.
"We broke up four years ago, so I don't know if he would." I winced at the fact I was telling her this.
Jane looked up from the machine, eyes wide.
"Four years ago? What?" She put her hand on the counter. "I thought you meant recently." Her voice was higher pitched, making me internally laugh. She did that when she was confused, or defending herself in arguments.
"Yeah. I was eighteen, he was twenty-one. When we were talking I was seventeen, but we didn't do anything illegal. The guys out there are people I know because of him. They all went to college together, but when he left college he left me." I'd spilled out the last bit accidentally. Embarrassed, I looked to the floor, hoping she wouldn't comment on it. Sharing personal information didn't feel right.
